A Little Hospital Ward ( A Zollie story ) #wattys2016

Valentines

I stumble back, watching mo and Jac lifting him on to the bed. My dad pulls me back.
'Zoshy stop..' I squirm in his grip.
'No, I have..'
'Let mo and Jac handle it..' I pull myself out of his grip.
'No, I'm not going to let my husband be alone when he wakes up.'
I look at him releasing what I just said.
'Husband?' He glares at me.
'Look I need to go..'
'Zosia' he grabs my arm.
'You heard me, now get off me.' I yank my arm back and run down the corridor.

'Ollie' I rush into the room, Jac and mo are resuscitating him. I stop and watch in horror.
'Zosia, it's better if you're not in here.' Jac glances at me. Then at mo, mo comes over to me.
'Come on I'll take you..'
I'm going to fight back but I realise the more time mo spends trying to get me to leave, the less time she spends helping Ollie.
'It's ok, I'll go.'
I turn around and leave the room, dropping to against the wall.
I can't lose him.
Dom sits beside me.
'Hey sista..' He kisses my cheek, I try to hold it together. I can't.
I turn to face him.
'What if I lose him..' My eyes fill.
'Zosia, listen. You're not going to lose him!'
I nod at him through my tears.
'Zosia!!' Dad walks behind us. I turn to face him.
'Can I talk to you' I know what it's about, I let it slip about me and Ollie being married... I slowly get up and follow him to his office.
He locks the door behind me. I awkwardly sit down in the chair waiting for him to start. He paces for a while before sitting down, even then he just glares at me for a moment or two.
'Zosia, can we talk about..'
'I don't want to talk, I want to go out there and..' I raise.
'No, you're going to sit and listen' his tone raises, I sit down.
'Thank you, now how is your bipolar?'
'It's fine.' I can feel myself getting irritated.
'No swift mood changes..no..'
'Can we just get on to what you actually want to say.' I stare directly at him.
He stands up, paces to the door, straightens out his suit and sit back down.
'You married Oliver...'
'Yes I did..' I half smile.
'Without my consent?
'I don't need your consent!' I walk to the door.
'I'm your father...'I stop and turn back to him cutting him off
'O, here we go...the I'm your father crap, save it. I don't want to hear it, how can you be my father when you've never been there for me..'
He sits back in shock. I stare at him.
'Look all I'm try to say is, I thought you was getting used to the idea of us.'
'That's until you eloped!' He gets up.
'We didn't plan it, it was a spare of the moment!'
'You got married out of a spare of the moment?'
'That's not what I'm say!!' I raise my voice and grab the door handle.
'Zosia March get back in here!'
'It's Zosia Valentine!' I open the door and storm out.
I've tried, I've tried everything to connect with my father and I'm sick of it!
'Zosia, Ollie's awake!' Mo rushes out of the room. I run into the room, Ollie turns his head and smiles at me, it feels like a huge weight has been realised.
'What happened to him?'  I walk over and grab his hand.
'orthostatic intolerance' mo hands me a medical sheet.
'Low blood circulation?' Ollie sits up.
'Yes.' I kiss his forehead.
'So I'm fine, I can go home?' He smiles at me.
'Just rest for a bit but yes you can. Try to avoiding triggers, such as hot and crowded environments or emotional stress and remember lying down to increase blood flow to the brain'
Ollie glances at me, not taking any note of what mo just said. I laugh.
'Yes mo I got this, I'll make sure Ollie behaves' I smile at him.
Mo smiles and leaves the room. I move round the Bed and sit next to Ollie. He grabs my hand.
'Somethings bothering you..'
'I did a pregnancy test today...and I wanted it to be positive, so when it came back negative...it crushed me Ollie, I wanted a baby. I wanted a baby that was ours..'
Ollie grabs my hand and squeezes it.
'Hey, it's ok. We can try again.'
'It's not that simple..' I look at him my eyes filling.
'I can't have children..'
'But you was pregnant once before?' He looks at me confused.
'I went to the doctors, they said that it was a one of coincident and the chances of that happening again is slim..'
'We can still try Zosia.' He kisses my cheek.
'We had a baby, I had a baby growing in me. It could of been yours.' I sit back with my head in my hands.
'But Zosia, we know full well who's it could have been.'
'But it could have been yours' he re grips my hand, I stare at him.
'You can't beat yourself up about that.'
'I have done since the day it happened, what are the chances of me getting pregnant after rape when I can't have children.' Tears glade my face, saying it out loud makes it all so surreal.
'You said it yourself, it could of been mine but you have to move on from that, that's in the past you have to let it go.'
'Yes, that's in the past but my not having children is in the future...our future..' I stop, I get up.
'I know you'll want children some day and Ollie I can't give to you...'
'Zosia..no don't you..'
'So I understand if you want to be with someone else who can give you that..' Say that kills me, but I know inside I'm right. I kiss his forehead and dash out of the room.
Ollie rushes after me, grabbing my wrist and turning me to face him.
'I don't need a baby, I have you and that is enough for me...so Mrs Valentine I would love you to escort me to back to my bed.' He smiles at me.
'Mr Valentine, I would love too.' I wrap my arms around his waist and head back to the room.
If only I could have one more coincidence.