So here I am alone in my room. Looking at my window. Hoping to hear a knock again from him.
I've been miserable for 7 years.
Yeah, 7 years.
Weird huh?
Sige sabihin nyo ng bata pa kami non pero who the hell cares? Si Peter kahit puro Neverland ang nasa isip nyan, sya lang ang nakakaintindi sakin. Yung tipo bang kahit sobrang moody ko pilit nya kong iniintindi.
Hindi ko din maintindihan kung bakit ganito kalaki ang effect sakin ni Peter.
Sa loob ng 7 years wala akong naging kaibigan. Hindi ako kumakausap sa kahit sino. Di ako nagkaroon ng boyfriend at walang nagbalak manligaw sakin.
Because I'm Wendellaine Jadeson.
They all know na si Peter Faulkerson lang ang tinuring kong kaibigan sa buong buhay ko. Sya lang talaga.
Peter's right.
Growing up is really a trap.
"Honey?" Nadinig kong tawag sakin ni Dad.
"Yes Dad?" Malamig kong sagot sakanya.
"Can I come in?"
"Yeah, sure." Without hesitations pumasok si Dad sa kwarto ko at umupo sa kama ko beside me.
"Hey princess. What's up?" He smiled at me. Pero halata mo sakanyang sobrang lungkot nya. Because I changed a lot. A LOT.
"Still the same." I sighed looking at the window.
"Wendy, hindi ko alam kung ano ginawa sayo ni Peter pero it's been 7 years. You need to move on."
"I'm trying Dad. I'm trying. Ako rin sa sarili ko hindi ko alam kung bakit 7 years na ang nakalipas eto parin ako nangungulila sa isang 12 years old na kaibigan!" I shouted at the top of my lungs.
"Ni minsan di na kita nakitang ngumiti and you never celebrated your birthdays. Anak hindi na tama, eh. Pati buhay mo naaapektuhan na ni Peter eh. Walang nakakaalam kung buhay pa ba si Peter or ano. Hindi na nga sya nagpakita or nagparamdam diba? The police also stopped searching for him kasi wala talaga silang mahanap. There are no signs of him. Kahit bangkay or ano, wala. Peter's gone, Wendy. Please. Stop this. Move-on."
"Lahat naman kayo ganyan yung sinasabi sakin. Na kalimutan ko na si Peter kasi sobrang tagal na niyang nawala and there's no chance na makita pa sya ulit. Bakit? Bakit kayo ganyan? Bakit ganyan nalang kayo sumuko sakanya?"
"Anak.. mga bata pa kayo nun! Hindi ko ine-expect na hanggang paglaki mo dadalin mo yan."
"Because he's special, Dad. He's not 'just a kid' for me.. He's everything. Please try to understand me.." He hugged me.
"Nahihirapan lang kasi ako para sayo anak. I don't like seeing you like this.." Umiyak lang ako ng umiyak while I'm on his shoulder.
-
Another year passed and I finally forgot Peter.
Hindi na ko umiiyak.
Hindi ko na sya masyadong namimiss.
But I'm still not back to my usual self. I'm still not Wendy. I'm still not that girl 8 years ago. The Wendy who used to laugh at everything and just write fairytales and such. I miss the old me...
What had happen to me?
I've let someone destroy my life just because of leaving.
Did Peter destroy me?
Do I need to blame him?
All I know is that he turned my life into shit. He made me weak. He made me wait for nothing.
One simple advice from me,
FAIRYTALES WILL DESTROY YOU
Don't believe in them because they're just playing with you and your mind.
I once believed in them and my life instantly turned into a nightmare.
Some fairytales aren't supposed to be happy. Just like mine.
Wendy and Peter's love story was really really tragic just like what happened in the book.
Wendy wanted to grow up, Peter doesn't want to. They're both different that's why they didn't work.
My situation right now is quite similar to what happened to them.
Peter doesn't want to grow up so at his birthday, he disappeared. Well, wala akong sinasabing nagpunta siyang Neverland because that place isn't real at all.
He left. Just like how Peter Pan left Wendy Darling.
