Oh. My. Fate?! (BL, Volume 12, Part 2)

287 Persisting Doubts

This painting ... wasn't it the embodiment of what he saw the present of their demon race as?

Due to Tian's curse, they had lost the ability to love. Not just lovers had suffered from this but also families, friends, and even the love people had for the things they did. Without this emotion, their world had become just as dull and gray as the stone and sky in this painting. And the only way to introduce a hint of color into this world was to search carefully, to find one place to break through and make everything shine again just like the petals of that small flower.

Ye Yang had to turn away so as to not give away his thoughts on this artwork and continued to walk through the rest of the floor at a leisurely pace. Anyway, the painting was etched into his mind. These days, it gave him some hope.

He didn't know what the artist had thought of when painting this but maybe ... just maybe there were others with similar thoughts as him. Maybe this was their way of expressing the disappointment over the demon realm's current state. Their way of showing some careful hope now that such a competition was happening. It might be possible.

Of course, it could also be that he was simply delusional and thinking too much. Maybe they had just seen something similar once and decided that it was interesting enough or thought that the concept would speak to someone and net them a better ranking. That was entirely possible. In fact, it was probably more likely than them being a kindred spirit.

Ye Yang suppressed another sigh. It was so difficult to find trustworthy confidantes in the demon realm. If he could find people who shared his vision — not just because he bribed them with something they wanted but because they truly shared his aspirations for their people —, he would have a much easier time with everything. Not to mention the tasks that could be handed over, just having somebody to discuss everything, to see what they thought of his ideas and his plans to implement them, and whether or not there was a better way to reach that goal ... he really needed that.

He reached the end of the floor and slowly made his way down the staircase. He didn't really know how to find people like that. Where to even look? It wasn't like most demons would talk about their inner thoughts outright. Because of how their people were, distrust was always high. Keeping your innermost feelings and thoughts hidden was a way of protecting yourself. Nobody would easily expose them so it was difficult to find someone who shared yours.

He unwittingly thought of the dragon king again who had a group of six whole advisers with their own area of responsibility. Something like that would be ideal. Even if it couldn't be six, just half of that would be an enormous help. But among the people he currently had at his disposal, there was at most Lin Shi whom he could trust. Even Xia Wei whom he had given some important tasks was only available in a very limited scope. That just wasn't enough.

Ye Yang reached the entrance of the pagoda and stopped for a moment outside the door, looking up at the sky. The weather hadn't been great recently so it seemed a little gray, just like in the painting he liked just that there were no dark clouds to be seen. The demon realm ... it still stood at the beginning when it came to the transformation he wished for. And the worst part was that he lacked too much to speed up the process.

Of course, he also knew that this kind of change couldn't be accomplished overnight. It would take years to show the actual first results and decades at least for something more substantial. It was just that some things couldn't be done without help. One or two people alone were unable to deal with everything. They really needed help.

Ye Yang quietly walked through the streets of the capital city, looking around and trying to gain a better understanding of this country of his. He had lived a long life in the demon realm but only ever as one among many. Even if he saw things he disliked, he never had to think much about them. Now, those unsavory practices in the demon realm, he had to take a long, hard look at them and see what he should do away with and come up with another plan to actually make it work.

The longer he watched, the less optimistic he felt though. Whatever plans he could come up with, they all fell through due to the lack of trustworthy manpower. And the worst thing was that he couldn't change that. He could make the demons focus on something new instead of the eternal chase for winning a pointless war and subjugating the dragon realm to restore whatever glory they believed their people had had in the past but ... he couldn't make a race without more tender feelings let go of their distrust. In this case, his hands were bound.

Ye Yang closed his eyes, took a turn at the next corner, and finally returned to his palace. He didn't want to admit it but even though he was slowly working toward the next small goal, he felt anxious about the future far ahead. He only had part of a plan and nobody to help him come up with the rest.

Maybe it would become obvious to him on its own while he pursued what he had planned so far but currently, he doubted it. In fact, he doubted everything and he had no one at his side who could notice and try to build him up. He really ... didn't know how he was supposed to shoulder the burden of being king alone. Maybe he just wasn't cut out to do it.