Oh. My. Fate?! (BL, Volume 12, Part 2)

259 His Decision Had Been Made

At the edge of the Spring of Fate, Jing He stared into the distance, his expression blank. It took several minutes for him to collect himself. When he did, his brows furrowed and his gaze held a hint of forbearance as he slowly lowered it to the golden surface of the spring.

"So it was like that."

He didn't say more than those words as if he couldn't bear to speak further. Only he himself knew how much his heart hurt as he stooped down and picked up An Xin, only slowly straightening up. It was time for him to return but even though his decision had been made, he still felt reluctant.

He closed his eyes and kept quiet for another moment. Sometimes, there just was no perfect solution and in this case, he could only walk the path of least resistance. Tears gathered and fell but it wouldn't change his decision.

He finally took a deep breath and forced himself to open his eyes before he turned around. His fingers brushed through the soft fur on top of An Xin's fur and he tried not to think further. All that was left for now was to go home and admit his mistakes.

With his head hanging low, he took the staircase leading down one step at a time. The further he went, the slower his movements became while his thoughts rushed ahead, unable to stay on the same worry for more than a moment.

He had made his decision but he didn't know how to go on. At this time, Qiu Ling was in the Nine Heavens, living in his father's palace so when he went back there, he would have to face both of them at the same time. The pressure of simply imagining the scene was huge but actually having to live through it was worse.

He couldn't change it though. He had given up the abilities of a fallen god so he could not figure out ahead of time whether Qiu Ling and his father were in the same room or not. Even if he could, he could no longer open portals so he was unable to get to Qiu Ling ahead of time. Since this was the case, what else could he do?

Jing He finally reached the foot of the staircase and stopped in his steps. He raised his head and stared off into the distance once again.

Was there an alternative?

He had decided and even though it broke his heart, he would listen to his father's wishes. Qiu Ling would be devastated when he found out but his father was likely to make matters worse and pour salt into his wounds. He ... could not allow for that to happen.

He was only choosing his father's side because he could not bear the consequences if he didn't. That didn't mean that he didn't still hold much love for Qiu Ling. No, his love for him would not diminish with this decision and it wouldn't with time either. On the contrary, their inability to be together would only heighten the longing in his heart.

This was something he could not change and he shouldn't either. He had to bear it. This was his punishment for falling in love with the wrong person and deviating from the right path, his retribution for letting Qiu Ling sink deeper into the quagmire and put everything at stake. He deserved it. But Qiu Ling didn't deserve to be tortured any further. This was the one point in which he couldn't concede to his father despite his decision.

Jing He hesitated but finally pulled out the transmission stone his lover ... or no, the man who had once been his lover, had handed to him so they could stay in contact during his time in the High Heavens. Holding it now, his hands trembled. He felt guilty beyond belief but the choice had been made and he couldn't go back on it. That was impossible.

Thinking of what he had to do, his eyes teared up again and he had to take a few moments to calm down again, drying those tears with the hem of his sleeve. When he felt that his mood should not be as obvious, he finally imbued spiritual energy into the transmission stone, trying to contact Qiu Ling.

For a while, there was no reaction. The spiritual energy sank into the transmission stone like a stone that fell into a lake: disappearing after causing a faint ripple. Jing He's brows furrowed but told himself that this was likely due to where Qiu Ling currently was.

He himself wasn't entirely sure where he currently was and what rules applied to this place so he had no way to tell what time it was either. He could see everything around him clearly as if it was the middle of the day but the Spring of Fate and everything around it might very well be perpetually enveloped in this light, no matter the time of day.

Either way, it was possible that it was currently daytime in the Nine Heavens. Then, Qiu Ling would likely be in the study next to the throne room with his father, working on documents or listening to the reports sent by his advisers. In short, he would be unable to accept this transmission for the time being.

Jing He furrowed his brows and finally stopped imbuing his spiritual energy. He wanted to tell him ahead of time but ... if it couldn't be done right now, then he couldn't change it. Since he still had a long way ahead of him before he would reach the Nine Heavens again, he might as well leave first and try again later. When he arrived in the immortal realms again, he would have a better grasp of the time. Then, he would certainly manage to reach Qiu Ling and warn him so he could leave the palace first and return to the dragon realm.

Anyway, this was the only thing he could do and it would likely be the last time they were ever in contact. Of course, he wanted them to have a little time at least to exchange their parting words.