We were never meant to be

Chapter fifty

Aaron
Once Ryan gave me a clearance, I wasted no time on beating the living shit out of the jackass. All I could think of was what he had caused her. The pain, the suffering, the losses, her future. Everything. And the fucker laughed right in front of me.
I punched him five times. One for Aaron, one for her aunt, one for her future, one for her baby and one more time for Kayla only, because why not?
It felt so good to hit him in the face with my foot. All I could see was him doing the same to her, so naturally I wanted to do the same to him, but make it so much more painful.
And now I'm in the bathroom trying to cool my head, before I do something stupid like actually kill the jackass.
I open the sink and splash some water on my face, hoping it'll rid me of my murderous intentions. I stare back at myself in the public bathroom mirror.
God, I look old.
The black circles around my eyes, the almost formed unshaved beard. It's like these last three years have worn me out completely. And I wish I could fix it, I wish I could fix our situation, but she won't let me.
She won't.
And I can't lose her.
'She was b-bleeding so so much, I thought she was going to die!'
Naomi's voice rings through my head again and all the anger that I tried to leave aside, rushes through my veins all over again.
'I saw the blood dripping down my legs and I couldn't do anything about it!'
I need to sort my shit out and fast. I splash my face again with ice cold water. It does nothing to my Jack-hatred. The only thing I can hear is the ringing in my ears. Not even the running water on my hands.
'He took everything from me! My life, my cousin, my aunt, my future, my innocence, my fucking baby!'
I hadn't even realized I was walking in my way out of the bathroom, when the door opens revealing a very pissed off Kayla. She slams the door behind her and stops in front of me.
"Don't even think about taking another step and into that courtroom again." She doesn't shout, but the fury in her voice is evident.
"Kayl-''
"No don't Kayla me. Are you out of you mind?! You can't just hit our opponent in the middle of a courtroom! And you were about to do it again!" Well now she's shouting.
"Are you aware you're in a men's restroom? You're lucky the aisles are empty." I think I'm pissing her off even more.
"I don't care where I am. Answer me." I know she's angry, but I'm not anymore. Just the sight of her made my rage decrease instantly.
"I'm not going to apologize for delivering not even 1% of the pain the jackass caused you. I should have hit him loads more. In fact, I will. Please step aside cheesecakes." She doesn't move an inch.
"If you think I'll let you out of this bathroom without sorting everything out, you're crazy."
"We're all a bit crazy love." She narrows her eyes at me.
"Revenge isn't up to us Aaron. You will achieve nothing by beating him twice more. You're only going to make things worse." She says most definitely not stepping aside. "Now, let's talk."
I sigh already giving up.
"I don't wanna talk." Because I will undeniably say something I'll regret, but I don't voice that.
"Well like it or not we have to."
"I have nothing to say cheesecakes."
"So you're telling me, that after all that mess that happened in there, leaving the whole fight tournament of yours aside, you have nothing to talk about. None whatsoever?" She says pure disbelief coating her tone.
"What do you want me to say Kayla?" She frowns at the usage of her own name. "What? I understand why you did what you did. I understand why you couldn't tell me what strategy you and Baldwin were going to use. I understand that you couldn't tell anyone what happened to you back then, it kills me that you didn't say anything to your friends and family, that you held all that burden by yourself, but I understand. I even understand why you couldn't tell anyone about Naomi either. I understand all of that. If we knew, we would have stopped you from using all of that evidence, prevented you from using your plan of action, because we wouldn't care about bringing justice to light, we would have cared about you not being exposed and hurt like that. And you weren't concerned about yourself. You needed the justice. And I get that. All of this," I motion with my hand. "I understand it. I'm not mad that you didn't tell me what you were going to do, what plan you had. I get it cheesecakes. I really do." She nods, but just like I know her in and out, so does she me. And she knows I'm not done. "What I don't get, is a whole other 'why'. I keep turning it in my head, I have been since the moment I learned of it and I just.Can't.Find.The answer." I look away, unable to face her hurt. "Why would you not tell me about the baby? I get that you couldn't tell me about it in court, but why didn't you tell me about it before? Before the court, before we ever learned of this damn forsaken trial. Why?"
She doesn't say anything, so I turn my head to look at her, which was a mistake, because now the only thing I want to do is forget everything and hold her. Like we're not in this situation, in this whole untangleable mess. Like we're just two kids who want to love each-other and can. Like we're normal. "Did I do something?" She shakes her head immediately, tears falling from her face. "Did I do some thing to make you feel or believe as if you couldn't tell me?"
"No."
"Because if that's the case, just tell me."
"Aaron no." She says fiercely this time. I look her straight in the eyes. Those damn green eyes. She thinks my blue ones are beautiful, but hasn't she seen what completely captivating eyes she has?
"Then why love?" I say dejected. "Did you think I would judge you? Make you feel as if you're a lunatic for wanting to keep your baby after being raped?" She shakes her head resigned.
"I didn't want you to think I was some fool who wanted to raise her rapist's child." She says so quietly, voice trembling. I'm stunned into silence.
"Well," I attempt to swallow the hurt. "you couldn't be further away from the truth. If you believe anyone, would think of you as less than brave for what you strived to do, you're absolutely delusional."
"What's the truth then? What would you have thought?" I don't answer that right away. No. I wait. I wait to find a way to explain to her everything that I feel. I'm not good at expressing feelings, but for her I'd thoroughly describe a Da Vinci painting.
"I admire you Kayla. And I'm not saying that, because I love you or because of that unexplainable pull we have towards each-other. I truly admire you and so does anyone who hears your story. I admire your bravery, your strong will to not give up, your faith, everything. And if you had told me the real story, the only thing that I would have felt towards you, was admiration and an increasingly amount of love. And I definitely would have felt an increasingly amount of anger, but that would have been towards the jackass." She chuckles a bit. I smile back at her, but I don't stray away from the words I need to tell her. "Who does that? Who has the guts to give birth to a child you carry by a man who destroyed your whole life? No one does that. And it's completely fucking amazing. Your bravery, your compassion towards others. And I know you're going to say that God strengthen you, but it was your choice sweetheart. God can strengthen anyone, but it was you who let Him do that. So many people give up everyday. You could have given up that day at the beach, but you didn't. You chose to move forward. And for that, I will always be in awe of you." I haven't even finished completely when she closes the small distance between us and throws herself in my hold. I wrap my arms around her without hesitation. Her small figure clinging to me, her smell, her warmth, they feel perfect, beyond comparison.
"You are otherworldly Aaron Andrews. Always remember that." She whispers in my neck. Her tears wetting my skin.
"As long as I have you near, I won't have to. You'll remind me. You'll push me to be a better man. A better one for you." She tightens the hold.
"You already are." God I never want to let her go.
We stay like that for a fraction, before a knock at the door interrupts our precious bubble.
"Go away it's occupied!" I shout still holding Kayla.
"All the five aisles?!" The guy from the other side asks shocked.
"Yes all five of them! Get lost!" I hear him curse under his breath and after that he's gone. Thankfully.
Then I feel Kayla shaking silently in my arms.
"Cheesecakes wha-''
"I can't believe you just kicked a guy out of a public bathroom." She says between laughs looking back at me.
"Well of course I did! He can't just ruin our moment and then to want to enter our personal space." She laughs furthermore.
"Except that it's not our personal space. It's a public one." I take her face in my hands drying away the tears.
"So not the point love." She stops laughing abruptly, but the smile is still plastered on her face. My hands linger there, my thumbs drawing circles in her cheeks.
"You've been calling me love a lot today. Any indication why?" Now I smile bright at her.
"I love when you talk fancy to me." She rolls her eyes waiting for me to answer her. "Maybe because you were astounding up there in the stand. Fierceness coating your every move. Or maybe, you're too damn enthralling not to call what you make me feel every time I lay my eyes upon you. 'Love.'"
"Aaron-'' Before she has a time to protest, another knock on the door interrupts us. I groan in frustration.
"I told you man! It's occupied!" I shout.
"Little Shit? K? You're in there?!" Ryan's voice rings through the bathroom hall.
"BB?" Kayla asks. Turning her head slightly.
"Finally found you! You guys about done hooking up? Baldwin and the guy that looks like Michael.B Jordan's lost twin, whose name I can't remember, are asking for you." God he talks too much. I could never.
"Oh. Okay." Kayla mumbles looking up at me. "We'll be right there." I respond and then we hear him leaving. "We should probably get going." I mutter disentangling myself from her.
"Aaron, about the-''
"Just turn a blind eye this time. Please. Just don't tell me how I shouldn't hold onto an irrational dream. I know that, but that doesn't mean I stop loving you with a snap of the fingers." I say resigned. She stares at me for a long time. Too long.
"Okay Aaron, you win. Let's go."
***
"Miss Everson." Baldwin nods at Kayla once we meet them. He turns to me.
"Mr. Andrews." God, he's so British. I nod back not procrastinating much. "Good punch lad." He follows it with that and I'm honestly surprised.
"Thanks. Appreciate it." I clear my throat and look at the documents he's holding, but not before I see his faint of a smile. And then it's gone, replaced by his serious demeanor.
"Miss, I just wanted to compliment you on a job well done. I'm going to be honest with you, I did not expect for the cross-examination to go that well. I didn't want to use the second strategy we had agreed upon, but I'm glad I did, because it was an utter success. You impressed me with your poise and skills, with the way you handled yourself up there. No many people can face what you encountered today. So I admire your bravery and I applaud you for it." Baldwin finishes. I think the man just earned my respect.
"Oh, uh...um, thank you sir, but I can assure you that your preparation for the trial helped me a lot, otherwise I wouldn't have-''
"Yes you would have." Baldwin interrupts her. "I barely helped Miss. I know when to take credit and when not to. In this instance, I can't." Kayla swallows the bewilderment and looks at me. I smirk with a knowing look. I turn my head at Baldwin just in time to see Huntley joining us. He shakes Kayla's hand baffled.
"Miss you were outstanding up there. I really am moved by your courage." Kayla's hardly holding her tears, while Huntley's still shaking her hand and the glare I send his way, has him pulling back his hand like I'd bite it. I think he's a bit scared of me.
"Thank you. Both of you. If you hadn't found us, I wouldn't have had the possibility to do something about it. Even if we don't know the outcome yet, I'm grateful for having been given a chance." Kayla speaks thankful.
"What are the possibilities of the jury ruling on our side?" I ask Baldwin. He turns to me.
"With Orlando not cross-examining Miss Hart, which was quite a shock might I add, things look slightly better for us, but I can guarantee no thing. Be that as it may, here's what you need to know. After Orlando and I give closing statements next week, the jury will retract back into their chamber, to decide on a verdict. When that verdict is reached, we will be notified." He's explaining us things we already know, we're third-year law students for Pete's sake. "But what will give us some indication on what the verdict is, will be the time." Okay now it makes sense. I nod understanding.
"What time?" Kayla asks. I'm about to explain it to her, but I think it's better if it comes from Baldwin.
"If the jury reaches a verdict within the first 24 hours after the end of the trial, then it means that they were already very convinced by the presentation of the facts throughout the trial. Meaning it's a good sign for us. It's clear that they didn't need the time, because they're already sure that Mr. Tyler is guilty. But..." Baldwin raises his voice. "if the jury takes days or furthermore to rule, then that means they're not very certain who is the actual guilty party. And that Miss Everson can mean anything. But this is not on any law book, you don't learn everything in school Miss. This is from my own personal experience. So let's hope the jury will act fast." Kayla exhales a long breath.
"Okay yeah. Thank you sir." Baldwin just nods again.
"We'll be in contact Miss." Then both him and Huntley leave.
"I don't even know what to expect of the jury now." Kayla says turning to me.
"I suggest praying and letting someone else handle this." She nods again and wraps her arm around herself. And that's my cue. Every time she does that, it's her tell, it means she's protecting herself from the outside world and wants to be comforted, wants someone to hug her. So I do exactly that, I hug her each time.
"How do you always know when I need to be hugged?" She asks wrapping her arms around me back.
"I have my ways." I mumble in her hair. She tightens her hold.
"I would have never believed Kayla to be this smitten with a guy, if I hadn't seen it with my own eyes." A voice I've started being familiar with, interferes, making us pull back and look at her.
"Naomi Hart, as I live and breathe." I say facing her.
"Aaron Andrews, this amazing guy I keep hearing about." She looks nothing like the girl I saw up in the stand. There she looked broken and hurt. Here she seems cheery and merry, but something tells me that's not the real case. She hides her demons well, like all of us.
"You throw a good punch. I like that." She says and I smile smugly.
"You threw a good punch yourself up there. It got all of us." I voice not really joking.
"Aaron be nice." Kayla says beside me.
"No, no. I like someone who doesn't hold back and speaks his mind. God knows we don't have enough of them." She snorts.
"K! I need your assistance immediately! Your best friend thinks she's the smartest of them all!" Ryan's voice booms throughout the hall. Good thing the guards are finally on our side.
"I guess that's my cue." Kayla says to both of us before leaving Naomi and I alone.
"Thank you." I say catching her off guard. Naomi's shocked face shows it all. "I know it's not easy to just show up after so many years and recall parts of life you wish you could forget. Let alone having to do that on the stand, in front of a sea of unfamiliar faces, judging you, criticizing you for the choices you've made. So thank you for coming through and helping us. I'll always be grateful to you for that. And I'm sorry for everything you had to endure, it mustn't have been easy to have to encounter that alone." Naomi's frozen, but her eyes, her eyes tell me everything.
"Thank you for acknowledging all of that. Not many people do. You really are the amazing guy I've heard about. I'm glad Kayla's got you. She deserves someone good." I'm already shaking my head no.
"She deserves better than me." Naomi's smile is a faint one.
"Perhaps, but I don't think she wants that. I believe that that mesmerizing girl, doesn't want perfect in her life, doesn't need better, she just needs real. She needs someone who has gone through pain, who knows the real meaning of it. Has had to overcome trials and stimulations before her and with her. Someone who isn't blindsided by life, by the unexpected future, because he's already familiar with the injustice of it. And I may not know your story Andrews, but I know a survivor when I see one. So you may not be the great successful guy, you may not be the hero or the prince. No. You aren't good, no one is. But you are perfect." Just when I'm about to protest, she adds. "Perfect for her." I stare at her dumbfounded.
"I didn't know how much I needed to hear those words, until I did." My voice hoarse. I've been holding back on doing something, living under this exact fear. Maybe, just maybe, I am enough. Not better like Naomi said, but true. I'm not going to refrain myself anymore. Kayla's my happy ever after and she needs to know that, while I need to start doing something about it.
"Glad to be of help." Naomi sings. She then turns looking at Kayla's figure standing next to Ryan's. I do the same. "Take care of her Aaron."
"I will." And for the first time in a very long one, I actually believe it.