back to you • lrh

27

Chapter 27: 
"Sounds like a you problem, lady."

Eloise-Anne

I grab the spare key to Calum's apartment and walk in. He hid it in the dumbest place and if he ever gets robbed, I sure as hell know why. As I walk in, I hear several moans. Ashton walks out of the kitchen and looks at me, hiding his happiness to see me. I somehow had hoped those moans were Ashton's because now I'm traumatized for life. I did not want to hear my brother in this specific way, in like, ever. 

"Ash, can we talk?" He gestures to walk into his room and I follow him. I sit down and take a deep breath. "I know I can't blame the alcohol for the shit I did, but I'm sorry." He looks at me and crosses his arms. "I truly am and I know it doesn't he-"

"I'm sorry doesn't change the fact that you kissed him." He hisses, interrupting me. 

"Then tell me what you want, Ashton," I say sternly. "You apparently want to stay mad at me, you want to call me names, you want me to get out of your sight. You don't trust me and I don't blame you. But I don't trust myself with him." I feel the attitude taking over and my patience seems to be leaving this room. I am trying, but he won't let me.

"You're in love with him." He states. I fight back the urge to roll my eyes. He will only think of me as a brat if I do so. 

"Don't start the bullshit," I say annoyed. "I am not in love with him, and I don't want to be in love with him. He annoys the living shit out of me. Sometimes I tolerate him, but barely. I don't know what made me want to kiss him, but I do know that I thought I kissed you for a split second." It's true. Some slight appearances came back into my mind and I know for a fact that they're true. 

"Yeah, that makes it so much better." He tries to intimidate me with his height, while I'm sitting on his bed. His eyes are forcefully looking into mine. As if he wants me to admit something. 

"Ash, what do you want to hear? Yes, I made a mistake but I'm sure it won't happen again." I tell him. I should stop thinking about Luke and try to continue things with Ashton. Every relationship has its downfall. "Ash, I love you." I feel my heart fall, I know I don't mean those words. It hurts me to say them out loud, not meaning them. It's not right, I'm lying about it. I'm really throwing this card at him. 

"Don't come fucking near him again." I simply nod. "I really don't want to see you guys together anymore." Yet, the card I just threw at him seems to have worked. Of course, this isn't what I want nor is it ideal, but at least he can grow to hate me a little less now, right? 

"Okay," I whisper softly. "Guess that works," he reaches out his hand and pulls me off his bed. His body is close to mine. "You still mad?" I ask him carefully. 

"Promise me one thing." I nod immediately. "Promise me to not talk to him, to hang out with him." I sigh deeply but nod. He's really going down this road, just like Calum and Michael. I can hang out with whomever I want. "I am serious about this, I don't need that attitude around when I'm here trying to forgive you for cheating on me." I bite my inner cheek to not give him a reaction back. 

But yes, he's still mad. Otherwise, you wouldn't answer the question with a question. Otherwise, you wouldn't barge over it with your own words. Otherwise, you would answer the question as a normal human being. I might even be underestimating mad, he's more than that.