Heartbeat of the Sunrise

49 (Part 6)

"You told them about my parents?" I asked in frustration.

Jonathan shook his head. I waited for him to respond but to no avail.

"Sumagot ka!" sigaw ko.

He flinched.

"L-Let me explain–"

My chest burned in rage. I gritted my teeth and squeezed the wineglass by my hands.

"Ximena! You're bleeding!" 

Lalong umagos ang dugo sa kamay ko. I dropped the remaining shard of glass to the floor.

I can't tame my fury anymore. Sa lahat ng pinaghinalaan kong taong pwedeng gumawa nito, siya lang pala? Oh well, hindi na ako dapat magtaka!

He just made a way for me to bite!

"You fucking asshole? You betrayed me!" Binato ko sa kanya ang isa pang flower vase. Umilag siya kaya nabasag sa dingding ang babasaging gamit.

"I didn't mean to tell them!" He asserted.

I smirked when I saw tears in his eyes. Para akong nakakita ng diyablong umiiyak. I know he will justify everything so I calmed myself again and tried to listen.

"At nakipagsabwatan ka pa kay Mira, ha? Tell me. Did that bitch also did something about my parents?!"

"Please. Walang kinalaman dito si Mira. She's–"

"That woman harassed me in my own house!" I yelled.

He went silent again.

"I didn't... have any choice but to obey them."

"Bakit Jonathan?" Natawa ako sa excuse niya. "Bakit pagdating sa'kin, wala ka parating choice? Ginagago na ako ng mom at lola mo, pati ni Mira, and there you are... still finding ways to please them?"

"I'm sorry..." He shook his head.

"Is that your way of loving me? Then I don't want that, Jonathan."

He looked at me with tears in his eyes. Naramdaman ko ang hirap na pilit niyang tinatago sa akin. He looked miserable in front of me as he laid back his gaze, leaning on the closed door.

"I... want to... get my inheritance–"

"Inheritance? Inheritance!" sigaw ko. "Isaksak mo sa baga mo ang inheritance niyo!"

"I want to get that for you!"

Ako naman ang natahimik.

"I know I am nothing without them! All of myself, including my things... my outfits... my suits... the food I eat, sa kanila galing 'yon! Maybe the paper stated that I am theirs legally, but they never... treated me as one! Still, I want to get that money so I can afford to live with you far away from them!"

His words struck my chest. I've never been this cold before. Natablan ako sa puntong pinagsisihan ko bigla ang mga sinabi ko sa kanya kanina.

But even to the core, I still felt nothing for him. Neither did I felt the need to consider my feelings because of his reasons. 

"Kailangan kong makuha ang loob nila para payagan nila akong maging independent sa kanila! But mom wouldn't let me! Lola wouldn't let me give up the chance to be her successor! Pakiramdam ko?! Buong buhay ko... binuhay lang nila ako para maging isang replica ng namayapang apo nila!"

He wiped his tears away with his thumb. 

Oo, pinagsisisihan ko na hindi ko pinakinggan ang side niya. But this is not what I want... anymore...