Severus Snape x Reader - The Note Box

『S4 Chapter 54 ~ Three』

❝ Hi :)

I think it's been about two years since I last updated? I can't even begin to describe how sorry I am to those that have begged for new chapters. I can't guarantee anyone is still invested in this story anymore but... I started something big and even if it takes me till the day I die, I kinda want to finish it. I'm giving this another shot. Hope some of you are still on this journey with me <3

Also for some reason I can't figure out how to put the video and photo here like I used to- I'll try to work it out but for now it's just at the top I'm sorry! ❞

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Me and the Devil by Soap&Skin
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YOUR POV

Over the first week of term, every student that met the requirements was encouraged to consider dropping their name into the Goblet of Fire. I'd managed to miss the announcement, but heard plenty about it the following day in class. Fred and George Weasley had the most to say, grumbling to each other as they watched the skrewts— something about the rubbish age requirement for the Tournament, and how their birthday was so close but just didn't cut it.

I wished, as a teacher, I could've just allowed them a free pass. I wished I could've told them that the prize money was practically theirs for the taking, that boundless opportunities awaited them— ones they wouldn't get in their unfortunate caste in society, not without help. But even I didn't hold that authority. And a wish was just a wish.

No, it seemed the only thing I had control over at Hogwarts was the Magical Creatures class. And even then...

Hagrid's blast-ended skrewts were disgusting little hazards. I always tried to encourage the gentle giant into taking part of the curriculum into his own capable hands, but since the accident with Buckbeak, he tragically reduced himself to animals impossible to get attached to. And believe me, it was impossible to get attached to skrewts. They were gross and pointy and weed-like.

Perhaps I would give Hagrid this week to experiment as he would, but next week I made the promise to myself to change it up. Something I was certain the students would appreciate. Maybe a segment on unicorns or Albus' phoenix would be nice.

For this quiet week period, as students wrestled over whether or not to drop their names into the Goblet of Fire to be selected the coming Friday, I had managed to completely evade Karkaroff. Only... I thought such a success would make me feel more at peace. After the first few days, it become apparent that peace was the farthest from me.

There was an anger nestled inside, like a small but heavy stone, too. It weighed down my chest. Severus ended up near Igor much more than I would have liked, and almost every moment I didn't spend either in class or with Severus, I was with Ludo. Ludo provided a desperate sort of companionship— on my end, anyway. I liked being around him, but after the first night of term, I realized there was an underlying tension and I wanted to avoid it. But he was the only person with the spare time to follow me around and I couldn't face the idea of being alone with a Death Eater (aside from Severus, of course...) in Hogwarts' walls.

So basically my choices were either "be alone and scared" or "be around Ludo, knowing full well he makes you feel farther from Sev". I surmised being with Ludo was better than being terrified and completely isolated. And besides, that tension was probably all in my head anyway. Ludo was a perfectly sweet friend. I was being unreasonable.