𝐷𝑜𝑛'𝑡 𝑇𝑒𝑙𝑙 𝑀𝑒 𝐺𝑜𝑜𝑑𝑏𝑦𝑒 | 𝐶𝑎𝑟𝑛𝑖𝑑 （𝑇𝑊𝐷）

chapter 4

Carl
After dinner, we were all cleaning up the aftermath. Enid was helping Maggie wash the dishes in the kitchen, and Jesus and I were in the dining room pushing in the chairs and folding the table cloth.

This is my chance! I've been thinking lately, and as embarrassing as it is, I need to learn more so i'm not in the dark here. I'm going to ask Jesus about sex. The whole word going to shit thing happened when I was 11, so there was so real time that my parents could sit me down and have 'the talk' like they normally would.

I never got the 'bird and the bees' conversation because there was never really a need to. It's not like the old world where i'd be in high school, dating people and going to prom but now it's different. Now me and Enid are in a long-time committed relationship, and I feel like I should be ready if we decide to take the next step.

I think i'd be less awkward with Jesus than if my dad was the one to tell me. Jesus is really chill and we have a pretty good relationship-he wouldn't make it weird, and my dad is... well... my dad. Plus, I'm pretty sure he'd kick my ass if he knew I was having sex.

"Hey Jesus, can we talk?" I try my best to not sound awkward.

"Huh? Yeah, sure. Just let me finish this up and we can sit down in the living room." He doesn't look up from the tablecloth.

"I mean... privately?" Shit. I cant stop myself from blushing. I stare at the ground to avoid any awkward eye contact.

"Uh... sure?" He looks skeptical, but leads me to my room anyways. I gesture for him to sit down and I close the door behind us before taking a seat down on my bed next to him.

"You're not plotting to kill me are you? I thought we moved past that." Jesus holds his hands up in a surrender.

"No! I wanted to ask you something but it's kind of... embarrassing." I chuckle and once again avoid eye contact.

"It's not weird if you make it." He shakes his head and I can't help but chuckle. "So what's up?"

"I uh..." I rub my hands on my jeans to try to stop sweating and i'm pretty sure my face is beat red. God this is pathetic.

"Can you teach me about sex?" I just blurt out like a fucking moron.

Great going Grimes!

Jesus just kinda stares at me for a second before bursting out and laughing in my face, grabbing my shoulder to support himself and steady breathing but utterly failing.

"Sorry kid, I just wasn't expecting that!" He manages to get out between breaths.

"Ughhh! Forget it! I just didn't want to wait and ask my dad. Imagine how bad that's be!" I groan and throw my head back.

"No, it's fine! Im actually honored that you came to me. I've got you covered little dude." He actually manages to seem genuine and i'm finally able to make eye contact with him and give him a nod.

"So, what do you wanna know?"

"Everything. I know nothing. I mean, I know about the girl parts and the guy parts and how they react when we get turned on, but that's really it. And I hate to admit it, but I only really know the second part from personal experience." I ramble. God this is so embarrassing.

"Okay. Well, then we'll start from the beginning. I'm guessing this is about Enid?" He waits for my nod in response. "Alright, well we all know that Maggie and your dad will kill you both if you get her pregnant, so you need to get condoms. You can probably get some from the doc. I will say this once, and ONLY ONCE. Always use a condom! Anyways, just don't stress. No one is good at it their first time. Just see what you both like, try some things out, and learn for the next time. It's more about expressing your love for each other than having experience. Just go for it. That's all I can really tell you." He sighs before getting up and heading to my door and turns back to me before leaving. "Does that make sense?"