Spencer Reid: Oneshots

Dazed

Summary: Reader has to lug a drunk Spencer home, which ends unexpectedly.
Warning: Drunkenness, mentions and drinking of alcohol

"Let's toast to Mr. and Mrs. LaMontaigne!" Rossi cheered, holding up a glass.

You smiled, raising your glass of champagne with the rest of the guests at JJ and Will's wedding. "Cheers!" The sound of clinking glasses and immediate chatter filled the backyard as you all began to drink. "You too, huh?"

Spencer grinned. "Special occasion."

"You're sure that isn't apple juice?"

He took a big sip, wincing afterwards. "I'm positive."

You laughed. "You can be pretty stupid for a genius."

Spencer rolled his eyes, taking another drink. "I think you've said that 7 times this week alone."

"I just speak the truth." You wiggled your eyebrows.

"And the truth is that I'm still smarter than you." Spencer smiled proudly.

You punched his arm, his drink spilling slightly. "Serves you right."

He shoved you slightly, droplets of champagne spilling. "Ha."

"You're a child."

"Could I child do this?" He filled his glass, almost downing it in seconds.

Your jaw dropped. "Spencer—"

He squeezed his eyes, exhaling. "This is why I drink—" He coughed. "—juice."

"You're insane," you said through your laughter.

Something about your laughter gave him validation. "Your turn."

"Not happening." You crossed your arms. "Someone needs to get all of your drunk asses home."

"Mmm, I'm an adult."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Positive." He sipped his drink again.

You sighed. "I'm only letting you drink this much because you never do, and I think you need to black out at least once in this lifetime."

"Partayyyyyy!"

"Jesus Christ."

You smiled. "It was nice meeting you, Beth."

"You too!" You wiggled your eyebrows at Hotch, earning an eye roll.

"Y/N," Spencer breathed, jogging over.

"Spencer..."

"We should—" He took a few breaths. "—We should dance!"

"Dance? You wanna dance?"

"What was that thing you said two weeks ago? YOLO?"

You face-palmed. "Never say that again."

"Only if you dance with...me." He stumbled backwards a bit. "I'm fine."

You shook your head, laughing to yourself. "Fine, let's go."

"M'lady," he said dramatically, taking your hand.

"Drunk Spencer is so weird," you muttered, letting him lead you to where everyone was dancing.

"I'm great at this."

"You're stepping on my feet."

"Your feet are in my way," he snapped back.

"Oh sorry, let me just get rid of my feet for you."

"Thank you."

You flicked his forehead. "Is Spencer Reid in there? I can't find him."