Chapter 52

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Steve P

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Steve P.O.V

We've been dancing intermittently all night, stopping for drinks and then dancing again, and I'm actually having fun, despite the horror show of when we just arrived. I don't know why I was suddenly struck with such anxiety but the thought of being intimate with someone I'd never met was overwhelming.

We're on the dance floor once again and Nat grabs my shoulders and pulls me down to talk into my ear so I can actually hear her, and my stomach flips excitedly, which I hate myself for.

"I wanted to tell you, I'm really sorry about the other day, it wasn't your fault for walking in on me. And I forgive you for today, again, not really your fault." I feel the weight of my actions lifting off me in a rush, the relief of being forgiven. I open my mouth to reply and she shushes me, "also, Maria Hill is behind you, she's been watching you for the last 10 minutes, I think she wants to dance. Say yes!" 

She spins me around, not even giving me time to think and I find myself face to face with the tall, slim brunette her face wearing a shy smile. She is wearing a low cut tank top and tight jeans, and I find myself suddenly really attracted to her, not that she wasn't attractive before but I only ever see her in work settings so this is entirely new.

"Hey! Do you want to dance?" She yells and I find myself nodding, reaching for her.

She puts my hands on her hips, the material slippery in my finger tips, she raises her arms starting to dance, but she's being goofy and it makes me laugh. She grins at me, and suddenly she tips her face up and pulls my head down, crashing her lips into mine.

I pull back, stunned, "what was that for?"

"I like you! I want to have a good time tonight, plus I'm a little drunk!" She yells and I laugh.

I lick my lips, "can I do it again?" She nods so I grab her face and kiss softly, but she pushes back feverishly, slipping her tongue into my mouth and pressing her body against mine, she tastes like rum and cherries and I've never tasted anything so good. I feel her hips begin grinding into mine and it's like a flip is switched. I want this, oh my god I want this. I don't know what it is, but I want it so badly.

Just when I'm coming up for air I feel a heavy hand on my shoulder, "Hey little brother, let's go home?" Thor says and I turn to see him smirking at me, "invite her to come home with you," he whispers so she can't hear.

Maria looks at me quizzically and I bend down to her ear, "we are going home, want to come?"

She nods and takes my hand and we follow Thor out of the club.

We all slip into the limo and Bruce and Nat look pointedly at me and then at Maria, grinning mischievously, I ignore them and look around, "where's Tony?" I ask.

"Tony will be picked up later," Happy calls from the front seat, "he has a few guests... and they won't be, uh, talking in the car I don't think."

I feel my face flush as Thor laughs heartily. Maria's hand drops down to my jeans and she runs her finger tips up and down my leg, from my knee up to my thigh and back again. I feel a tightening in my stomach as well as the fabric of my pants and I suddenly feel incredibly nervous and ill-prepared, I have no idea what I'm doing, I don't even have a condom.

I shift my coat to cover my lap and draw in a shaky breath, do I want to do this? How do I do this? Maybe that's not even what she wants, maybe she just wants to hangout I try to tell myself, but I know it is a bold faced lie.

I'm so invested in my own worries that I don't hear the conversation going on around me until Thor nudges me in the ribs and I look up to realize everyone is looking at me intently. "Sorry?"

"Did you have fun?" Nat asks, but the way she laughs makes me think she's asked several times without a response.

"Oh, yeah, it was good." I stammer, Bruce tilts his head at me concernedly but I look away from his searching gaze.

"See? I knew you'd have fun!" Thor rubs my hair and I shove him off, driving my palm into his head. He laughs and puts me in a headlock and I punch him in the ribs.

"Boys! No, not in my car!" Happy yells and we pull apart laughing.

"Children," Nat scoffs, rolling her eyes.

"I am not a boy, I am a man!" Thor bellows.

"Hey what about me?" I jab him in the ribs again and he elbows my stomach.

"No Steve, you couldn't even order a drink at the bar. You are not a man. You are our child." He says and I feel my face flush with embarrassment as I hear Maria giggle. I punch him hard in the leg, "not a Charlie horse!" He whines and headlocks me again, grinding his free fist into my crotch.

"Ouch Thor!" I yell, grabbing myself.

"You hit me first," he says as he grins at me.

"Hey! I'm serious, no fighting in my car!" Happy barks irritatedly.

"Sorry Happy," we mumble in unison.

"Okay, I think we can all agree they're both children," Bruce laughs, his speech slurred from alcohol.

The women both agree and then Happy announces that we are home and the nerves that had been forgotten come rushing back. Everyone files out of the car and wait for Bruce to put in the code for the door. It finally unlocks and I'm about to enter but Bruce grabs my arms and holds me back, Maria looks back at us questioningly, "do you know where Steve's room is?" He asks her.

"Yes I think so," she replies.

"I can show her!" Nat says happily.

"Great, he'll be there in a minute." Bruce says and I look at him in confusion.

"What are you doing?"

"Just a second," he waits until everyone is gone and then he pulls a few small packages out of his pocket. "I don't actually use these, we don't need to, but Tony asked me to give them to you."

I feel my face get hot and I reach up a trembling hand to take them, but my hand is shaking so badly I fumble and drop them. I stoop down and collect the little square packets, running my fingers over the circle outline.

"You okay?" Bruce asks slowly.

"I don't know if I can do this!" I blurt, my nerves peaking. "I don't know what to do, I don't even know how to use a condom!"

"You'll know what to do, your body just kind of... does it. And the condom? Just put it on the tip and roll down." He says, making the motion with his hands.

I shake my head, "what if I do it wrong?"

"Ask her to do it, some guys like it so it wouldn't seem out of the norm if you asked her to." Bruce shrugs, solving that problem.

"What if I can't get up?" I say, trying to find another excuse.

"You're already up." He tells me with a smirk.

"I am?" I look down, "oh, I am! Okay... what if..."

"No, Steve stop. It's okay, you'll be fine. If for some reason it's not, you can come to my room, okay?" He grabs my shoulders firmly, "take a couple big breaths," he breaths with me a few times, "okay, now go!"

I take one last deep breath, stuffing the condoms in my pocket, "okay," I whisper and walk down the hall to my room, a man on a mission.

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