𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐕𝐈𝐕𝐎𝐑𝐒 -titans.

CHAPTER TWLEVE

CHAPTER TWLEVE
tw. talking about suicide 

SUICIDE. HARLOW ALWAYS WANTED TO DO IT. BUT CAUSE HER ANXIETY SHE NEVER PULLED THROUGH.her mother would always say that if you killed yourself it would bring pain to someone elses life. which in harlows case it would be dick, who was also secretly suicidal. no one knew except harlow, the only person that he trusted with this secret. dick was a different suicidal person, he had no intent to live so he put himself in situations that could get him killed so he wouldn't have to pull through himself. 

harlow, she hated her life. ever since dick left, which made her suicidal again. harlow was happy, until he left, and he knew that harlow was going through a rough time. harlow would do everything in her power to make sure she would die, she sacrificed herself, she did stupid things. it made it look like she was a hero if she ever did die.

harlow also knew what dick went through. she knew it took everything in his power to make sure he didn't end it for himself. after he left she knew he would've been a wreck, especially when he knew harlow was going through the same thing and he couldn't help her. 

dick and harlow were actually similar. harlow obviously was different from dick in many ways but when it came to their mental health, they were practically the same person. they always put themselves in danger, neither of them actually caring if they made it out alive. they both had anxiety, dick knew how to deal with it and not show that he has it; harlow was similar, but always showed it in the tiniest ways. she would show it by (1. playing with dicks fingers. 2. completely staying silent. 3. she would play with the rings on her fingers. 4. she would look like she couldn't breath.)

harlow has worn a sweatshirt around dick, unless they made out, but he wouldn't be able to see the scars. she has never worn a short sleeved shirt around anyone, she never will until she got help. which may never happen. 

after sabrinas death, not even a week later jericho died. harlow and dick actually went into a depression together after the team left, only ellie knew that. harlow got addicted to drugs and drinking, dick was only drinking. but they lost so many people in their life they couldn't lose each other. well that's what they told themselves.

"what are you thinking about?" dick asked looking over at his girlfriend who stared out of the window. she didn't answer, instead she accidentally rubbed her arm uncomfortably. dick noticed but didn't say anything, it was her story to tell he didn't need to make it worse. but one thing he was curious about, "did your dad hit you? when you were younger?"

harlow looked over at him, she sighed, "no, he didn't. he just cheated on my mom, thats all. he was actually super nice, hard to believe that but he was the best dad in the world. then he cheated, then he died. now he's back only to kill me."

dick looked over at harlow with a 'seriously' look. she smiled but then it faded as she looked at her hands, "I feel like shit." she admitted as she bit her lip. dick looked over at her, "after you left,  I fucking..." she looked out of the window. "I fucking hated this life, and I took it out on barry. not that you would care but I missed you dick. I fucking missed you every day, I understand why you left but I was this close to making it so were I would never see you again."

dick looked over at his girlfriend, she played with her ring she got from someone other than dick. it was probably olivia, but dick didn't know. "you aren't the only suicidal one dick, so stop trying to kill yourself in situations like last night." harlow pointed out which summed up her whole 'speech.'

"really? I didn't know." dick said as he looked back at the road. "I knew you were going through that, you don't know how many times I picked up my goddamn phone to call you. I just thought... you know."

"yep. now he might be gunning for us and hey I mean, as long as we go down together that's all that matters." harlow sarcastically said but she meant it. she actually meant it, she wanted to make sure she died by dicks side. well maybe just her dying but them both dying together would work also.

as long as they did it together.

brynn speaks

a little on harlows mental health through the years and how dick leaving affected her. poor baby :(