Chess Pieces #5: Loki Von Amstel

Chapter 53

Loki tugged my hand gently and led me out of the room. I was just following him as I didn't know where he's planning to go. I know that he's gonna tell me his story. That's what he really meant when he said that he'll introduce the real Loki to me.

We went to the veranda in front of the house that has a view of the whole beach. The wind was now calm compared to what it was earlier. It was blowing our hair gently so I didn't have to mind much about it.

Loki leaned his elbows on the railings and looked at the sea. His hair was gently moving against the wind. He has a calm expression on his face but I could see the sadness in his eyes.

I looked at the sea as well. The sounds of the waves made me feel so calm and sad at the same time. Maybe that's why I, as well, saw saw those expressions on Loki's face.

I remember what he had told me. That he celebrated his seventh birthday here alone. What if that day was like this as well? Imagine a seven-year-old boy hearing the calming sounds of waves of the sea and instead of celebrating, he felt sad and cried that no one was with him that time.

I was right. He had a rough childhood as well.

"My original plan was to take you to the main manor at London." he said, eyes were still on the sea. "But father was there so I had to bring you to York. It doesn't mean that I don't want you two to meet. There's a right occasion for that." he looked at me. "I'm just afraid of what he'll do if he sees you."

Loki being afraid... This man who looked so authoritative and powerful. I just can't believe that there's something that he's afraid of.

"He's a very, very strict man, Eresh. It was obvious how influential he is with just his title." he continued. "His Royal Highness, the Duke of York. And he used his power even to me."

He played with his fingers. I noticed that he doesn't want to look at me while telling me his stories. He's not comfortable showing his vulnerable side. And I realized that he really is the King of Pretend.

He was just pretending to be strong, to be powerful, to be manipultive. But the truth is... He has weak side as well.

"You don't have to tell me this, Loki. If it makes you uncomfortable."

Mabilis syang napatingin sa akin. He shook his head firmly like he's telling me he wasn't going to change his mind.

"No. I told you, Eresh. I want you to meet the real me. No mask. Just the bare me."

I nodded. Well... I kinda understand why he looked uncomfortable. I was like that when I was opening myself up to him. I was uncomfortable. I felt uncomfortable. But I still tried to tell him everything. 'Cause I want him to understand me. I want him to know my story.

And maybe, he's like that to me as well. Trying to tell me his story even if he feels uncomfortable 'cause he wants me to understand him.

I sighed. I know Loki had said that we should forget the game for awhile but I can't help to think what will gonna happen after this. Especially now that I have special feelings for him.

"My parents disciplined me to act like a royalty. To think like a royalty. And to talk like a royalty." he said. "That's what my childhood life is. I wasn't allowed to play 'cause they said that apparently, playing isn't necessary as a royal blood and it will just just make me a naughty child."

I looked away. I don't know what to do. Loki looked so sad as he talks. It seems like he really was hurt from what happened to him.

"All I did was to study and read books. That's all." Loki continued. "It felt like... I was just a robot that needs to follow all the orders from my masters. I must behave. Or else, I won't be of any use if I disobey."