A wolf of Words
~•°•~
It was over and he had just lost her forever. There were no chances of redeeming himself. That was his fault and entirely his. It was so hard to fathom how disgusting he felt inside. Shame was an overwhelming sensation that glowed brightly on his cheeks. He had his tail tucked between his legs. Being disappointed with himself was not a familiar feeling. A wolf like him prided himself with success, but he no longer felt like that. It made him want to hurt himself knowing he had hurt the people he loved.
First, it was Ignacios. He threatened to take away Lyra from him. And now it was Lyra that despised him for failing to tell the truth.
As he walked towards the cabin, he thought of ways how to apologize to her. But who he found was not who he expected. It was the tall disheveled figure of Edward that stood against the porch. Eyes beaming with a wave of torrential anger. He hoped it wasn’t what he expected. Felix could feel how his eyes burnt through his body, almost melting him.
“Sir.” He addressed him as he trembled.
Edward’s hand gripped the wooden railing he was leaning on. It was truly a frightening scene. Like a beast waiting to explode. Looks like word travels terribly fast. He grimaced.
“What is this rumor I keep hearing about?” The wolf asks.
“I only heard it in the morning too when I headed for breakfast. People know she’s marked.” He replied with a low tone.
“This is stupid. Whoever spread the rumor needs their head twisted.” The hate in his voice was all too obvious. “She’s not marked, she was burnt.”
Burnt. The word alone made Felix scowl.
“The young Seeker, I think Jasper was his name. He tried to shoot her. He was afraid of her.”
Felix remembered how the Seeker froze with fear as he trained the muzzle of his handgun in his way. At the moment, he was frozen too. If Ignacios didn’t come and helped, a bullet might be logged in his guts. Even in the moment of sheer shock, there was Ignacios to save the day. His brother will never fail to impress him even further.
“Ah, it’s understandable. The young kid was from the East. His parents served their Alpha before, he’s only been the Head Seeker for two years.”
It was odd how a teenager was appointed to that position. And a very unstable one at that.
“Listen to me, Felix. Get Lyra out of here now and stay hidden, if push comes to shove, I will do it myself.”
There was that again. The constant commands that still led to nowhere. He didn’t want to fail Edward but he had gone tired of it all. With all his courage, he looked him straight into the eyes and spoke.
“No.” He says. “I’m tired of all of this. I’m not going to help you anymore.”
Edward’s jaw locked.
“That’s not a very funny thing to say.”
He almost snorted. After hearing everything from Esmeralda, it had felt like a revelation. Why Edward was too desperate to keep his daughter safe. It was a frugal attempt to patch things up when all the pieces of his story were too small to even fit in his fingers. It hurt him to even think about the things that had happened in his childhood. To be bullied and hurt for no reason at all. She went through it all. He grimaced at the thought. But he stood firm with the need to talk to him overcoming his fear.
“It’s not supposed to be.” He murmurs.
“Then why, Felix? I thought we already went through this. You can’t quit until the job is finished.”
“When will it be finished, Ned? It won’t, not until we kill whoever is behind this. Kill the one they call the wolf king. We need to kill Orion.” He whispered his last words.
He knew there was no way of shutting him up if no one had said that. And he was right. Edward’s eyes softened, his lips quivering like a mess. It made him feel sorry for him. He must be torn apart with his children being on separate sides of something he couldn’t control.
His whole story was altered. He spoke with reason, with Lyra being his only child and his mate belonging from the Midlands. After rumors of the Midlands recruiting more and more wolves, he had to find a way to keep his daughter safe. She was a Midlander by blood from her mother. It wasn’t the case now. The real reason was wide open and Felix realized it was all a sham to convince him to work for Edward.
Sensing the wolf was not going to speak anytime soon, Felix took the liberty to speak again.
“After I apprehended the shewolf you asked me about, it turns out, she was a direct node to the Midland Alpha. He is your son, Edward. An Alpha son which only means you mated with the daughter of an Alpha and Lyra, a Luna by birth. Do you think it was fair of you to omit that to me? You threw me out there for a mission to protect your daughter with the lack of information. But of course, that didn’t matter. I would be willing to die to protect Lyra, my brother and to follow you. But what you did was wrong. And what my father did to your family was wrong too.”
Indeed the pain that went along as he spoke his words was clear in the tone of his voice. Grief was in him and it made him feel too little. Shrinking down in size as Edward took him in his gaze. Contemplation in the wolf’s eyes glowed.
“So you know about her?” Edward sighed in defeat.
“I’m sorry, Edward. I’m sorry about Lyca. I’m sorry what my father did to her.” He refused to meet Edward.
“Doesn’t matter now, it’s the past.”
“But it should. He destroyed your family, Edward. He killed your mate. How do you even stomach looking at me and Ignacios?”
Edward walked up to him. Every second it took adding suspense in his stomach. But what he didn’t expect was a warm embrace. It sent him back in time when Edward lovingly held him like a son. The sheer moment of peace caused his heart to pause and relax. It was both pure bliss and dread that he felt. Mostly because, the father figure he always looked up to hold him proudly as his own while the unrelenting thought of his real father, Jopheil being responsible for Lyca’s death, haunted him. He had no idea how much he needed this. A familial hold that which he was denied for too long.
Felix never wanted to dig his memories. But when he was growing up he had suffocated from the sheer amount of jealousy. With Ignacios being the next Alpha, everyone’s attention was directed towards him. And Felix was forced to follow his brother’s footsteps. That’s why they were both different in many ways. He couldn’t catch up to his brother and instead followed his own steps. Nevertheless, Felix loved with an older brother with all his heart as both of them carried their own lives with Edward being their father.
“Jopheil and I were great friends and I know what he’s done to my family is irreversible but I have forgiven him so such a long time.”
He felt Edward’s hand lightly squeezed his shaky shoulder. Slowly, he gazed up to meet the wolf’s cool blue eyes.
“You’re father only did what he has done to protect the people he loved.” Edward smiled at him.
He felt his wolf weep at the soft gesture. Felix had thought no way. No one could justify that. He shook his head.
“I don’t understand.” He whispers as he stepped away from him.
“I still remember that day, very vividly in fact.” Edward started.
As Edward stood in the door frame, he couldn’t help but feel all too useless. The pain in his heart only grew when he set his eyes on his Alpha. Jopheil had a sickening glow to him. His pale skin and darkened eyes was a trait that has never existed before. He was mortified with what he was about to say. It made him feel even weaker.
His best friend lay in his deathbed like a lifeless husk of a man.
“Neddy.” Jopheil’s weak voice called for him again.
But he did not answer. His throat suddenly burned with unexpected anticipation. He wanted to kneel by his side but fear overcame him. Was it selfish of him to wish his Alpha did not look like that?
“Edward, please.”
He couldn’t wait anymore as if any second had passed, he was sure it would only melt him down to a sobbing mess.
“My Alpha.” He lowered his head.
A sly chuckle let off the Alpha’s lips. “Edward, you don’t have to call me that.”
“Yes, yes, of course, Jopheil.” Edward stepped closer to his side.
“I’ve been waiting for you. I just couldn’t go without seeing you.”
He almost choked from the tears he held back.
“You’re not going anywhere, bud, I’m here and we’ll have the most amazing time of our lives.”
It was foolish to stay in the light of a sunny disposition. But he was willing to say anything to calm the raging sadness in Jopheil’s gray eyes. His heart ached with defeat as he sat on the bed.
“I like that. I like that very much.” Jopheil mustered a weak smile. “I have something to tell you, Ned.”
“You don’t have to talk now, let’s talk after you rest.” Edward offered his hand but the Alpha shook his head.
“You know I would never intentionally hurt you, right?”
Edward smiled. He was caught by his sudden exclamation. “Of course.”
It had him feeling confused. He didn’t know what his Alpha meant by that. But the edge of his voice caused him to dread for the worst.
“Because I did.” Jopheil grimly stated.
He felt his heart drop to the floor as the nerves in his body started to slowly unravel. The serious tone the Alpha shifted to was a daunting one. Like snow turning into a storm. Every muscle in his body tensed making him brace himself.
“When the pack came under fire from the Midlands, I was the first to respond. There were dozens of them, screaming for a runaway Luna’s name. They said she fled into our borders.”
Every single color in his face drowned and fell from his face. Tears begged to be let out behind his eyes. But he held them in.
‘Please Moon, no…’ He silently begs to himself.
“After I was done with every single one of them, I tried looking for who they were looking for. She was the cause of so many deaths that day. I thought, maybe getting rid of her was a good idea. I didn’t want the wolves to get into the packhouse and hurt my family. So I scoured the woods and found this little home by the edge of our borders. It was well hidden and very secluded. This strong unfamiliar scent, I knew then it was I was looking for. A shewolf hid her children behind her. I tried reasoning with her, but she flashed a silver dagger in front of my face. I was provoked and I thought of all the dead warriors because of her and I started losing grip on my wolf. I chased after her. She left her daughter in a hurry, she couldn’t carry them both and run at the same time. I could see how painful the decision was for her but I chased her out of their home, followed her through the woods until she was trapped between me and the river. I couldn’t stop. My wolf was on a high roll and I took a step closer until she fell in the river. It was when she called out for your name being carried by the rapids. I killed your mate, Edward. I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”
Like a monster, his words consumed Edward’s heart with ease. He was starting to feel light-headed. The insurmountable amount of tears that slowly cascaded down his pale fear-stricken face dripped down on the thin sheets of the bed. How could he live now with the knowledge of his best friend being the reason why he had lost his mate?
Jopheil’s hand reached under his pillow, bringing out a silver dagger and the ring he had given to Lyca. It was her wedding ring. Her scent still clinging onto the metal.
“I made a mistake, Neddy and I want you to rectify that.” He handed him the dagger and ring.
Shivering with fear, he only stared at his hands. In his left was the ring, in the right was a dagger. It was anger that fueled the will to drive it straight into his skull was indeed overwhelming but he restrained himself. He had the audacity to just say that. Just thinking about it, he knew why he did it. He was protecting his pack. Edward would have done everything to protect his family too. But he couldn’t stop himself from feeling extreme hatred. Both of them were fathers desperately trying to make good to their families.
He tucked the ring into his pocket and gripped the dagger. He threw it to the hall, with the tip piercing the wall. It was a realization that dawned upon him. Death was not an option to heal someone’s wounds. And killing Jopheil would only amount to nothing.
“What are you doing?” Jopheil asked.
“How can you be so selfish? You want me to kill you because of what, exactly? You’re a coward then.”
“I don’t know why.” Was his meek reply.
“You’re going to abandon your children just like that? No Jopheil, live for them, you have to. You owe it to them to step up and be a proud parent.”
He would do everything to be that way to his daughter. To live for her. Nothing could stop him from doing what he wanted. Even if he would be standing on the sidelines, he would stop at nothing.
The Alpha only smiled at him. His kind eyes looking a little bit lost.
“That’s another problem. You see, my wolf has already cleaved me. It’s only a matter of time now. Once I lose my wolf and become human, I ordered Beta Larry to have me killed. It’s the only way I can atone for my sins.” He cocked his head.
Words fail to leave his mouth as the stinging pain of truth kicked in like a punch to the gut. That’s why he was looking weak and tired. He had only thought it was stress that consumed him. His feet thudded the floor and his hands flew up to the sides of his head.
“Fuck!” He cursed aloud.
“I’m sorry, Edward.”
“No. You don’t get to apologize about this!” He turned to his Alpha with rage.
“Please, listen.” Jopheil tried to raise himself from the bed but ultimately failed, causing him to squirm in pain.
Swiftly, Edward went to his side and braced the Alpha. He held him, gripping his hand.
“This is a dying man’s wish.” Jopheil pulled him closer. “Yes, it is selfish of me but please. Love my sons for me. Lead them to a path of your choosing, be their father.”
“But you can be that father to them.” He pressed.
Jopheil shook his head gently. “Edward, it’s too late for me. Your hope for me only shows how much of a better person you are to me.”
“Edward,” Jopheil called his name one more time.
He paused, knowing it was almost time to say goodbye. He didn’t want that. Saying goodbye meant he would give up on him.
“Yes.” He whispered.
“Promise me.”
Before he could say anything more, Jopheil fell onto the bed and closed his eyes. He has exhausted his final breath of life. Edward screamed his friend’s name out in the air, trying to wake him up. But he didn’t. A man laid in the bed, pale and deathly. His heart could only take this much heartbreak. With time passing, the door slammed open and Larry entered, pulling him away from Jopheil’s cold body. He couldn’t stand to be with the same room as him. His feet trudged through the thick depressing air in the room and ran away.
He promised himself he would live up to the Alpha’s words. He was tired of letting the ones he loved down.
Felix could only stare at awe. Hesitation and humility slowly perked up in his senses. He could not fathom how much hurt and pain Edward had gone through all those years. Being able to have his daughter near but never really call her that.
It dawned upon him why Edward was always too hard with him and his brother when it came to training them. He was honoring his dead Alpha’s words.
“I honor your father’s words. Deep down, I know. He was just trying to do everything he can to protect his family and that’s what I’m doing now. But I have failed your father. I promised him to protect you and Ignacios at all costs. Now, your brother’s head is gone in the wind and I sent you off to mission barely informed.” Edward smiles sadly.
He felt torn. Now that side of him was opened, Felix contemplated if he really wanted to leave Edward. He owed him to stay there, but it didn’t feel right to.
“My father, he doesn’t deserve a friend like you.”
“Maybe not but I looked up to him.”
Felix bit his lower lip and breathed out heavily.
“Lend me your hand,” Edward says.
The wolf draws his knife out of his pocket and grabbed Felix’s hand. His palm facing up and exposed. His eyes widened at the sudden action as the light that reflected from the sun onto the dagger glared with benevolence.
“What are you doing?” Felix nervously asks, fearing something terrible was going to happen.
The blade sliced the palm of his hand, letting out a stream of crimson red blood. He hissed as the stinging pain from the silver metal. Terror was spread across his face as Edward did the same thing to his hand.
“I, son of the South, Edward, promise to let go of the binds that connect Felix Santillano to me. This pact is witnessed by no one. A promise of freedom and liberty I shall grant him.”
He was taken aback by the sudden act. Disbelief rocked him knowing that Edward had now given up and offered another pact. A pact that would let Felix go back to the South. He paused as the dread in him continue to grow. His thoughts brought him back to what Edward had done to his father.
Edward honored the words of a wolf who had done him wrong.
He wasn’t going to slip up and let that pass by. If he was willing to go in and all out to fulfill his promise, Felix was going to do the same. He slapped his bleeding hand onto Edward’s and spoke his part of the pact.
“I, son of the North, Felix, prove my loyalty to my father, Edward Millard and stay in the North as long as I am needed. I promise to do everything I can to serve him. This pact is witnessed by no one. My fealty and unending allegiance I shall grant him.”
He shook Edward’s hand and lowered his head. That was his goal. To help the wolf who taught him everything. Pride was what he saw in Edward’s eyes causing him to smile with happiness.
“Your father would be so damn proud to see you now.”
“His words don’t matter to me. I’m sure he would have been a great dad, but you’re here and it’s you that I believe in.” He nodded his head confidently.
A pat on his back only assured him of his decision.
“So what’s the plan now?” Felix asked.
“Well, that rumor must have come from someone. We need to find out where and from who.”
“How about the Beta?” He questions. Although he and Diego had never really talked much. He knew of him from stories he heard from the South. He was a defector from the South. He left but all the terrible things he had done stayed. It was quite a shock finding him here. That was why he never trusted him.
“Seems highly-unlikely. That cuck is too busy sticking his nose into other people’s problems.”
“But who appointed him to be the Beta?”
Edward paused, suddenly realizing where he was going with this. “It was Larry. He appointed the Beta just a few weeks before he retired and left.”
“And we both know Larry is not a very trustworthy wolf.”
“I will have a word with my connections. They’ll find who started all of this and I will have them look over some things about Diego.” Edward promised. “And what of my daughter, are you still going to go after her?”
“No, I realized, even all the shit Ignacios has done, she still loves him too much.”
The wolf side with disappointment. “He’s getting married in less than two weeks.”
Felix only smiled sadly. Earlier today, he saw all the love Ignacios held for Lyra. His gentle kiss on her forehead only cemented that fact. That Ignacios would stop at nothing to be with his mate.
“No, Iggy’s not going to let that happen. I see it in him and plus, what is my happiness when my happiness takes away the life from people I want to see happy with me?”
Edward nodded. “I’m proud of you, Felix.”
He only smiled, thinking how much he wanted to say more. To be better, you have to let some things go. He was letting to let his own self aside to make the people around him happier. Just like Edward did. No doubt he was determined to follow the footsteps Edward left behind.
~•°•~
Hello, everyone! How are you doing?
I hope everyone's alright. <3
Basically, it's like there's two chapters in this chapter. If you remember chapter forty-one, I immediately cut it off then and then. This basically explains everything between Edward and Jopheil.
Tell me what you think down in the comments?
Is Edward still a jerk from hiding everything from Lyra?
Let me see you thoughts in the comments. 💕
Loving all of you always,
Jino