Five Year Old Insults Are The Best

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The day went fine. Totally and completely normal.

Until lunch. That was when things got awkward...

Let me set the scene:

The guys decided that we would all eat lunch together. Without my permission, as usual. At lunch, their delayed popularity kind of hit everyone all at once. And of course, they got noticed by the self-proclaimed popular kids.

That's when a whole bloody fleet of girls showed up by my tree, basically plopped themselves in the guys' laps, and ignored me as they began to talk to them as if they were best friends. 

Elle being one of them.

I rolled my eyes at the scene.

'Desperation isn't a good look on anyone, mate.'

Next thing I knew, all the damn jocks showed up and crowded my tree even more.

AND TRIED TO TALK TO ME.

Yes, Houston. We have a problem.

"So, what's your name?" A brown-haired kid asked me with a smirk. I simply kept my head down as I read my book as if he wasn't even there. After a minute, he spoke again, "Quiet, huh?" He paused at my silence, then leaned in my ear. 

"Not for long." He whispered as if to seduce me.

It didn't work. All I heard was a garbage disposal that needed to be taken care of;

'What in the actual bollocks is this prat talking about? I mean, what did he think my reaction would be? Christ, I'd prefer to see this piece of shite get his di-'

"Um...can you guys...get lost?" John spoke up awkwardly, disrupting my wanting to tell this twat to go to hell. 

And it's a good thing he did. 

Secret identity be damned, I was so close to giving those morons a taste of my fist.

After I heard his words, I snapped my head up from the ground and gave John an amused look.

'Someone can't handle the popularity.'

He looked very awkward and uncomfortable with Elle who was practically on his lap who had somehow managed to weave her fingers through his. I stifled a snigger at the comical scene before me.

'This is too good.'

Poor Ben looked the same as John, and Grayson just looked bored as a redhead stroked his hair.

I had to literally swallow my laughter so no one would hear me. And let me tell you, it was hard as balls.

The whole scene was just so awkward. 

The girls stopped whatever they were doing to the guys and gave them incredulous expressions. The jock who was trying to talk to me along with the other jocks, stopped talking and gave John an 'are you serious?' look.

To everyone's surprise, John removed the blond bimbo's hand from his chest and put her off of his lap.

"My friends and I were about to discuss plans for their English 3 class. And y'all are kind of disrupting us." He continued, faking politeness.

"What my cousin means to say, is scram." Grayson so inelegantly put it, making a smile threaten to take over my expression. 

The girls looked surprised and utterly appalled.

'AHAHAHAHAHA!'

And guess what. Elle even had the nerve to start tearing up. Sadly enough, her acting was so poor that it wasn't as amusing as I hoped it would be. The whole thing kind of turned into a pathetic soap opera.

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