To the Moon and Back ~ chase hudson

63

I wake up and notice
that no ones here. I look around,
expecting to see chase pop up but then soon remember everything that happened yesterday. Even though I still feel like being a sad piece of shit and lounging around the whole day, I have a show that I need to attend. It's today, then tomorrow, and it will all be over. I will have a week before I have to return to Minnesota and have to bare seeing my family again. I never mentioned it before, but I have a little brother and an older brother. I am the middle child and as you would assume, I get the least attention. And the only attention I do get isn't good. I'm constantly yelled at and even though I am successful my parents aren't proud of me. However, me and Hunter, my older brother, are super close. He's only 2 years older than me and just graduated a couple months ago. Last time I was there, my dad slapped me because I was leaving him for so long and he thought I was gonna get pregnant since there are so many boys around. My mom has a different heart than him. She loves us all dearly and would never do anything to hurt us. Sometimes I wonder why she doesn't see that dad is a bad person and gets a divorce. But that's love. The love between them is like a concealer to her, covering up all the imperfections about him and all the trouble he causes. But enough of that. I quickly remember that I don't have any clothes for today and neither Natalia or Hannah are in the room. I come to the conclusion that I have to get some from my room. Great. I text Natalia that I'm going to get clothes from my room and hope that chase isn't in there, although I'm gonna have to see him today anyways, which I am dreading. Walking out of my room and into the other hallway, my hallway, I see Anthony talking to Zoe and quickly remember everything that happened. Of course I already remembered it, but seeing them again stung my heart. Tearing up, I try to walk faster to get away from them and then walk into my room once I get in there. I peek over to the bed to see if chase is there, but I don't see any sign of him. I quickly dig through my suitcase and grab the first pair of clothes I find which happened to be a white cropped sweater and a black and white plaid mini skirt. Perfect. I rush out of the room and back into Natalias so I don't come across anyone I don't want to see. As soon as I open her door I am greeted by the one and only Natalia. She notices the clothes I have in my arms. "Why didn't you just bring your whole suitcase?" She laughed as she asked. I laugh along as I think I probably should've done that. I scurry into the bathroom and change, brush my teeth, straighten my hair, and do my makeup. I actually look, pretty. I haven't felt I looked like that in a while. It's definitely a change, but a good one. I open the bathroom door to step out of it and as soon as I do Natalia pops out and scares me. We both end up on the floor, laughing. This is the first time I've had a good genuine laugh since the whole situation happened. But reality quickly kicks in and my happy laugh turns into a sympathetic frown. How am I gonna face him at the show? It's gonna be the first time we've seen each other since the breakup and that's not gonna go well at a show. People are gonna ask what happened and their gonna assume things that aren't true. Hell, Zoe's probably gonna bring it up and there's gonna be a heck of a lot of drama and yelling. But something inside me still hopes chase will stand up for me. And that's when I look down at my finger, my ring, the ring that promised he will take care of me through thick and thin and represents trust as well as love. I fiddle around with it for a second as tears fill up my eyes and Natalia wraps her arms around me as I let out soft cries. "I just don't understand. I thought he was perfect, I thought he was the one. Honestly, I still do think that. It's just my stupid ass being selfish and dumb to realize that he does trust me and he does love me. I miss him Nat, I miss him a lot." I say as tears drip down my cheek and I rest my head on her shoulder as we sit on the floor against the wall. "Just give it time El. He'll come around and I know he will. I've never seen him look and act like that to another girl than he does with you. Your special and he can see that. He'll make it up to you and everything will he happy again." She replies as I see a salty tear come from her eye. We both end up crying, somehow, and holding each other's embrace. It's weird to think about how I just met this girl not too long ago and she's already one of my closest friends. But it's nice, having her around, having another body of support. It's odd though that Payton hasn't come and talked to me yet. God knows where he is right now. Come to think of it, I really don't know where anyone is. "Where is everyone?" I ask Natalia knowing she'd been up longer than I have and hoping she knew where they were. "They're uh- uh... helping set up for the show. It's supposed to be a special one today." I nod my head  and just believe her because I'm too tired to think of anything else they could be doing. I'm just hoping chase doesn't pop up at the show begging for my forgiveness the way he did to ask to be my girlfriend. It was very sweet, the way he did it, and I really couldn't have asked for a better way for him to do it, but if he does it another time that's overdoing it. As I start drifting off into thought, Natalia warns us that we have exactly an hour till show starts and we both stand up and quickly fix our makeup. We also just start laughing at random stuff while looking at ourselves in the mirror. Oh, how much I will miss her when we all have to say goodbye. Finishing up, we run and pretty much tackle each other down the stairs, leading to both of us tripping onto a step. I stand up and reach my hand out to help her up. I turn around and that's when I see Chase. The one who I had once loved more than anyone else in this world. Who am I kidding, I still do. Nothing we've been through changed my opinion about him. We make eye contact for what felt like ages. I notice tears starting to form in his eyes making them glossy but soon realize mine are too. The amount of temptation I have to just run up to him and him hold me in his arms is unbearable, but I know I can't do it. I feel Natalia pat my back and that's what puts me back to earth. I look back at him for a quick second and notice him mouthing, "i miss you." I quickly mouth back, "me too" without thinking. That was a big mistake. Realizing what i had just done, we walk toward and onto the stage because we only had about 10 minutes left until it started. I tap my fingers and shake my leg up and down anxiously waiting for chase to come on the stage. Surely enough, 5 minutes later he showed up and sat right next to me since our seats were assigned. I try to pull myself together and not let too much emotion show, for my supporters. "So if the fans ask what happened, do we answer?" He asks me, breaking the silence. "If they ask you, just hand me the microphone because i want to say it myself if Zoe doesn't get to it before I do." I reply back as my voice shakes and I can tell he picked up on it because he started to look even sadder, if that was even possible. And just like that, the crowd pours in, and the show starts.

(I hate this part so much but it's whatever it's not too bad ig. Also next part is gonna have big tea so stay tuned. These last 2 haven't been very exciting but I promise you the next one will 🤫)