Warning: mentions of suicide
It was an early morning in Boston. A warm, comforting morning. Sean was the only one in his whole suite that was relishing in sleeping in, even if I was for only half an hour longer.
He'd had a hard week. He was swamped in his classes, and had been feeling distant from Kaycee lately. She had been stressed out, and so had he been.
"Sean Lew, get up!" Sean heard one of his suite mates shriek.
"What the hell is going on?" He immediately woke up, feeling grumpy that his sleep was interrupted. "And what the hell are they doing?!" Sean asked once more, now in a more concerned tone.
He watched as the head disciplinarians and security of Harvard searched through Kaycee's room.
"Mr. Lew," one of the gaurds started. "Kaycee committed suicide last night."
"Excuse me?" Sean asked, staring at the man who seemed to give about no emotional connection to the sentence he just spoke.
"Miss. Rice was found dead in the third floor women's bathroom last night. A bottle of Advil and an empty, broken bottle of gin beside her." The same man explained as he scribbled something down on a notepad, not even caring to look Sean in the eye.
"But...but Kaycee's my girlfriend...she...I love her." Sean stuttered, tears immediately welling in his eyes.
He stood in the dorm lobby, his old pajamas immediately seeming to lose all of their comfort. His hands tangled in his matted curls.
Tears immediately started pouring down Sean's cheeks. He quickly dashed to their own dorm bathroom, being overcome with a sudden urge to throw up what felt like every meal he'd ever eaten.
It was like his body had no other way to make room for all of the emotions that were just thrown on him.
"Mate!" Sean's suite mate from earlier that morning, Mike, ran after him. He left the older Harvard men to do whatever investigations they needed. "Breathe, Sean." Mike coaxed, holding back his now sweat covered pajama tshirt.
"I can't believe she's gone." Sean sobbed, picking his head up as he slumped against the wall. "Why would she...I should've seen the signs."
Sean's mind spun, continuing to conjure up ideas that convinced him that Kaycee's death was his fault, rather than the fault of the constant pressure of perfection that the Harvard lifestyle projected onto every student.
At that moment, Sean couldn't remember that Kaycee had the biggest lab of the year that next morning. That she'd fainted because of malnutrition four days prior, and that she had been up until four a.m. studying every night for the last month, running on barely two hours of sleep every single day.
It wasn't Sean's fault, though it felt it was.
~~~~~
So this is actually trash, and I will rewrite it. Everything is just crazy right now I'm sorry x
