Comforting

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"What did Lexi do?! How did she even get in contact with you?!" Ash Asks frantically, worrying too much. Although I suppose I did lock myself in my room for hours without going out my room for food or drinks. Or fresh air. Don't blame her.

"I was gaming and she was in my lobby.. I didn't speak at all so she wouldn't hear me as I recognised her straight away but I needed to cough. Back then I needed to cough a lot, as you know already, so she knew my cough - which is a little weird". She hums. "Lexi realised it was me and we started talking. She was actually okay. We went off the game as it ended - and I didn't want to friend her - so we talked over Instagram. Not long after, she started accusing me of cheating on her again. Harsh comments were made towards me and abusive messages were sent. It felt like I was in a relationship with her again as that's how everything went with her. It was awful and I took it. Somehow I dealt with it."

"But you didn't deal with it good". I shake my head. "Oh Ryan please don't do that again. Just tell one of us. Please"

"I know, it was stupid and petty of me to do that but I couldn't help it. When I said bye I blocked her on every platform she could possibly find me on - except for YouTube, you can't do much about that. The comments stupidly got to me and yeah... I-I am sorry I did that to you guys"

"Hey it's okay. We know you're okay now" Cam speaks up.

I look to him and smile. "Thanks Cam"

"Now let's get you food and drinks. You must be starving and dehydrated"

"Yeah..."

"Silly" Ash chuckles.

When we arrive in the kitchen I spot my kids. They turn around and spot me too. Big smiles spread across their faces. Freddie tries to move but is stuck in his crib just rolling around whereas Emily comes running up to me.

"Daddy! I missed you, I missed you, I missed you!! What happened?" She Asks.

I chuckle at her excitement. "Daddy had a, uh, 'little' breakdown. Nothing to worry about now though sweetheart". She giggles as I pick her up and swivel her around. She holds onto me with pure love and passion, bringing joy to my heart. It makes me sad to think I worried her - and Freddie for that matter - so much that it was as if I left for war or something.

"Foods Ready Ryan" I hear Ash shout to me from the kitchen counter.

I nod, placing Emily back down and making my way to Ash. The food smells amazing and I thank her. God I missed food and liquids. She smiles and I give her a loving kiss full of my sincere apologies to her. I think she got the memo from it that I was sorry as she squeezed my hand, telling me it's alright now.

When things calmed down - well, when I collected my thoughts and took a breather - we all settled down to watch a movie. I don't know exactly what we are watching but everyone seems to be engulfed in it. Ash is cuddled up to me with Emily cuddled up to her. Freddie is asleep peacefully in his crib while the rest of the guys are cuddled up with their lovers or sitting comfortably on the couch with some popcorn. We're like a big happy family and that's what I love about my friends. This is about to get sappy. Christ.

These guys, I don't know what I would have done without them if I'm being completely honest with you. Yeah I would have met Toby and Jay, then Cam, but I wouldn't have known Ash if I didn't buck up enough courage to check on her or I wouldn't have met Ash if I didn't spend my time observing my surroundings, being the curious guy I am sometimes. Who knows where I'd be with the boys - don't get me wrong, they're awesome too.

I know I'd have gone to PAX with them anyway, but I wouldn't have been with Ash. We then wouldn't have had our moment. And that was probably the kick start to the closer than normal friends relationship I had with her at the start.

I'd probably have moved back to Texas as the adults will have got the job they had, allowing them to move back here, but I'd have just gone to Sunny Side Daycare. Things might have gotten hectic without the help from the daycare kids at Minecraft Daycare, and the Director, and Ash. Rob might have actually killed me. Emily wouldn't have been born and neither would Freddie have been born.

Oh god, it also means I'd have stayed with Lexi. Oh no. I couldn't bear to be with her any longer. How I managed to stay with her for so long bewilders me.

I like things how they are right now, and there's nothing I would change for the world.

I love my friends.

And they love me.

Christ, that was sappy as hell.

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