PANI SS: It's Divine

Confessions and Heart breaks

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" Niti, nahi reh paya yaar Tum se mile Bina...."

Niti was undoubtedly happy. She was longing for him. But more than that she wanted to avoid him. She knew being close to him will not keep her sane. Her entire being burns in his proximity.

Parth walked in and sat on the couch. Niti followed him..

" dinner kiya ?" Parth asked ..

" bus karne hi wali thi...tumne kiya?" Niti replied

" Chalo fir kiska intezar hai?" Parth said. Niti was watching all his actions. She was confused how he can behave so normal after their kiss where his presence was setting her on fire. He pulled Niti towards the table and dished out food for both of them. She was still not over his cool attitude but she chose to remain silent. they had dinner with some regular chitchat Niti thought that Parth would take a leave now. Niti's thoughts halted by ringing of the door bell. Niti was like " ab kaun?". Niti opened the door and smiled looking at meherzan who had come to give back her new DVD player. She asked him to come in. She turned to introduce Parth to him but he was not there. Niti got confused but understood he did not want to meet him. She bade good bye to meherzan after having a cup of coffee with him.

Parth was waiting restlessly in her room he was somewhere pissed off with his arrival ,sensing meherzan gone he came out. He enquired about him And started walking towards her room. That's when Niti stopped him..

" kahan Jaa rahe ho?"

Parth gave her a confused look and said "wahi jahan mein kal gaya tha,sone". Niti nodded and started to clear the couch of the living room. Parth saw this and asked " yeh kya kar rahi ho?".

" making bed for me. Aur kya?" Parth came towards her

" aise kaise? Tumhe pata hai na I can't sleep without you"

Niti looked at him shockingly " Parth aisa kaise ho sakta hai? Tumhe pata hai na what happened between us. You only said na friendship comes first". Parth was now petrified thinking of staying away from her " whatever happened happened ab nahi hoga , I cannot sleep without you". He dragged Niti with him to her room. Niti was confused, shocked, annoyed by his behaviour that why a matured  boy is behaving so childish. But she was unaware of Parth's insecurity towards her.

It often happens that we become over possessive for the person we are hopelessly in love with jealousy and insecurity creep in naturally but in the whole process we forget that what is ours will return back to us and what was never ours will never be ours. Niti was still pondering over her thoughts he pulled her to the bed hugged her tightly and closed his eyes. Niti was completely pissed off but when she saw his beautiful face she forgot everything. The truth was even she craved for this. Him being so close. His beautiful almond shaped eyes, the twin moles on his cheek and those beautiful thin lips made her forget the world. She closed her eyes having peace in his arms pushing all that was running in her mind.

4.30 a.m

The temperature of the AC was too low. Parth was feeling cold now he in his sleep subconsciously snuggled more in to her. Her being near was not enough for him he started searching for blanket on the bed with his eyes closed. In the process his hands reached Niti's back. Her top was little up because of her sleeping position. Parth's cold hand touched her warm skin and he opened his eyes lazily. Her beautiful face was a sight to watch first thing in the morning..

" hmmm....she looks beautiful, so peaceful I just wanna have her in my arms forever" .He leaned and kissed her forehead. Meanwhile his hand had started caressing her back inside her top. Not controlling more he kissed her eyes one by one he pushed her more in to him. Niti woke up because of the sudden push and opened her eyes. She saw his eyes boring in to hers. A pool of emotions swirled in his eyes which didn't go unnoticed by Niti. His hand that caressed her back started giving goosebumps to her. Her hand involuntarily reached the back of his hair and she she started stroking it. She felt the heat arising and tickling her core. A moan escaped her mouth that made Parth more excited and started to rub her whole back with his palm. Parth's lips touched her nape and started rubbing his lips on her nape. Their bodies rocked each other and they were lost in the passion.

Parth could not control himself and kept his lips on hers. He started sucking her lips and how could she not respond by the touch of his lips. They were kissing each other madly , their bodies rocked with each other, legs tangled. They were loosing it completely. But, As soon as Parth's hand pinched Niti's waist Niti came in to senses. She suddenly removed her lips from the strong grip of his lips. He groaned by loosing her touch. He again tried to come forward but Niti stopped him. This irritated Parth and he forcefully again took her lips in his mouth. He was now hungrily devouring her. This angered Niti more. She just pushed him from herself and quickly stood from the bed. Parth was puzzled by what just happened.

" did she just push me?" He stood up moved towards Niti . He held her elbow and made her face him.

" Niti, what happened? Why are you behaving like this?" Niti watched him with confusion.

" Parth, tum ab bhi Yahi pooch rahe ho? Hum aisa Kaise kar Sakte hai. Remember we are toh friends na. Friends ke beech yeh sab nahi hota Parth."

" Niti, are you disgusted with what is between us" Parth said annoyingly.

" tum kaisi baat kar rahe ho Parth? Do you even know what you are saying? It's always bliss when I am with you. But hum kahan Jaa rahe Hai? Mujhe toh yeh tak nahi pata hum hai kya?"

Parth was loosing it as he himself was confused these questions were also killing him. But unlike Niti he was not ready to confront them.he pushed himself more in to her

" kyu mein bura lagta hoo tumhe. Nahi Accha lagta jab mein tumhare Paas aata hoo. Mujhe nahi samajh aata ki mein kya karoo? Hum kya hai ? bus Itna pata hai that I need you and I cannot be away from you."

Niti asked him " yeh hamare beech jo hai iska koi future hai Parth ? Kal agar hum alag ho gaye fir kya karenge? Bolo Parth, yeh sab kya sirf physical hai agar humara attraction Khatam ho gaya to tab kya karoge?

Parth had no answers but he was angry and now he had lost it he started yelling " haan hai physical. Bolo kya tumhe Accha nahi lagta when I touch you, when I kiss you. You also equally enjoy it right" Parth could not put it in correct words. He wanted to say that we both are equally important to each other but in the fire of his anger he was burning it all.

Niti slapped him hard and in reaction he grabbed her took her lips inside his mouth for a harsh kiss. He was biting her. She pushed him. Niti could not take it she saw him with anger in her eyes in the heat of the moment she blurted the truth that she herself was unknown of

" haan I enjoy it ...but it's not physical Parth , it's not physical. It pains here in my heart to stay away from you. Kaise batau Parth I Love You...suna tumble yes ,I have madly fallen in love with you". Niti stopped after listening to what she just blurted out. She knew her sudden confession will make things more complicated but she needed a closure. " nahi reh Paungi agar tumne chod diya. Pyaar karne lagi hoo tumse. Bolo, will you be able to feel the same that I feel for you?" She asked clutching his collar.

Parth was shocked due to the sudden confession. He was numb he could not react. He was not sure what to answer. No way he was going to fall again in the clutches of the thing named love. He had already gone through this pain earlier. He just stepped back. Niti stood their astonished that how a person who cared for her so much, who needed her badly is void of any emotions right now. Was it all an illusion or she had made a very big mistake by allowing him to let him through her once again.

Niti did not say anything she just looked towards him " Parth, please go and return to me only when you know what I am to you". Parth stood there stunned he could not actually believe that Niti asked him to stay away. He wanted to say so many things but he remained silent. She turned her back towards him and he got the clue. He was angry, shattered, annoyed rejection had taken a troll over him and he just dashed out of her apartment.

Niti slid down against the wall , held her knees tightly in her arms and cried her pain out.

Niti was left heart broken, Parth was confused of his current status. Did Niti really loved him? Or it just came out because of the circumstances. By his actions it seemed that he loves her than why did he not accept it. Complicated it is...yes, we humans are like this. Let's see what's stored for them , separation or a more stronger bond as hamesha.....