My Second Love ✓

36. Companionship

I am sure he's trying to dodge the topic. I sat stubborn not to touch the food.

"Khushi eat"

He sighed defeated "It was not at all catchy story Khushi. I just saw you at the University and were mesmerized by the way you behaved with others. I thought it was attraction and tried to forget you. But your face kept haunting me. I never believed love in first sight then. But after days passing, I couldn't erase you from my thoughts. I convinced myself it was just a attraction. Your images would pop up in my mind now and then. I shrugged it all under the name of infatuation. But it hit me hard when mom started my marriage talks and look out for a girl. I denied to see any girls only then I came to know about my feelings. Then I started searching for you and it did take time inbetween my heavy schedule. When I found out, your family was finding alliance for you. Without delay I send my family to speak with your parents. And when I saw after years you're not at all same. Instantly I know something was wrong but couldn't find out what. Not wanting you to dwell in your worries I opted for quick marriage. After that you know everything" He shrugged coolly explaining his five years in just a second.

Here I am confusing just from past months but he.. five years. Dammit. How hard it could be! Top of it I hurt him a lot.

"Arnav. Why didn't you confide this with me at earlier? Maybe it could've saved us from going through the tough phase" Said I cursing the time we wasted.

"You're not in the state to hear anything Khushi"

I sighed lowering my head. Hadn't I shut him up when everytime he approached me to have a talk? How mercilessly I denied his friendship proposal? How outrageously I pushed him away when he try to cope with my mood swings?

Uff...

I was snapped up when a thing touched my lips. Bend down, I saw him stretching a spoon of morsel infront of my lips waiting for me to apart it.

Letting him feed me, I sat analysing his each and every expression. His face was calm like always but now a new glow added to it. His eyes twinkled in joy. He was so sincere even in taking the morsel and his gaze was fixed only from plate to my lips.

How he looks composed always? What magic is behind that? How can he handle everything with patience? Hell, how did he hid his feelings since past years? And even after marriage? How hurt he must felt when I didn't even treat him as a human. Holy shit!

In no way, I will be equal to him. But he was more than equal to me.

In no way, I will be the missing part of his life. But he's the missing part of my life.

In no way, I will be a perfect partner for him. But he's the best partner I could ever imagine.

In no way, I will be a good friend to him. But he was always a friend which we never voiced out openly.

In no way, I will keep him everything above my priorities. But for him, I was...

My own thoughts choked me to breath. How could I ever dare to hurt him? I want to scream. I want to cry out loud. The scream which my heart wished was ready to spill out from my mouth. It weighted my heart and throat simultaneously. I cupped my mouth to swallow it. I can't embarass him amidst of fifty people. I can't hurt him... I can't... My eyes blurred with rain of tears. Where's Arnav? I looked at my opposite to see it empty. Where's he? Arnav... Arnav... Did he left me? Is he fed up of my behaviour? Oh god.. Where's he? Arnav... Panic rushed through my veins. I shuddered.

"Khushi.. Khushi.. what happened? Why are you crying dammit?" I snapped my head at the voice and shocked finding Arnav beside me.

"Arnav" I whispered brokenly.

Next instant I was on his arms. He throws his arm around my frame crushing me into his. I clutched his shoulder and laid my head on his chest wetting his shirt.

"Khushi. What happened? Did I said anything wrong?" He asked worriedly.

More tears rolled down by his question. He thinks he hurt me, how can he. How can he think like that? He never hurt me! I vigorously shook my head as no, lest I'll upset him.

"Then why are you crying now?" Asked he rubbing my back.

"Nothing"

"Shh.. Don't lie, ok. I can see what nothing it was. You said, you trust me. Won't you tell me?" Tears stopped as he rubbed soothing circles on my arms.

"Don't you think we already stepped into friendship zone? Won't you share it with your friend?"

I looked up coming out of the hug.

"Trust me it's nothing. I... Just insecurities. I fear... Arnav what if one day you fed up of me?" I sound myself as a vulnerable child.

He cupped my cheeks wiping the tears "Never. I'll never fed up of you. Love does not come with only happiness Khushi. One should accept their love with all their flaws, that's the true love. I, accepted you knowing you very well. Throw your insecurities away. It do nothing but restrict you from approaching me. You can share anything with me if not as husband at least as a friend. You got it?"

I found myself smiling and nodding to him.

Once again he proved as a good husband!

_______

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