Karma [Bastille Fanfiction]

How does that make you feel?

Tara POV

And how does that make you feel? I was tired of hearing that phrase. The foam ball in my grasp has been squeezed of any air. The glass of whiskey had been refilled multiple times.

" Tara? Tara? How does that make you feel?" I glanced up at the blonde before me. We were sitting in the back of the tour bus with the door closed. She was a traveling therapist. Who knew such a profession existed. " How does losing Kiki make you feel?"

" No... How does asking the same question over and over again make you feel? I'll tell you how it makes me feel. I feel like I wanna kill you sometimes, because it drives me crazy!" She wrote something down, and just like that the whiskey glass was empty. "That was so important it just had to be written down."

"You won't move on unless you open up. About Every thing."

" What is telling you going to fix? Is it going to bring her back? Do I get to hear her voice again? Is it gonna take back the years of my life that I wasted? Or the fact that a year of my life I spent in a coma? Or the fact that my partner left to go be a superhero without me and got himself hung? Or the fact that those fuckers have had my dad for ten years?" I sat back and looked out the window. Steven left ten days ago. Six days ago he was on national news holding up signs he was told to hold up. He was a mess. He was stoned then hung. I screamed at the tv, tears slid down my face. I had felt love for him at points in my life. We shared plenty of drinks and deep talks. Then I went numb. Completely numb. I had no other team mates to lose. The day after I sat trying to decode that chip till my eyes blurred. The next day I heard his name. Roy. My father was alive. Relief and anger were all I felt. Dan knew I was isolating myself through all of this stuff. Lucy had seen the kiss and thankfully understood that I had no part in its exchange.

"That's enough for today don't you think?" She stood and closed her book. I closed my eyes till she left and a familiar scent entrapped me. Perfectly relaxing my wild mind that seemed to never stop thinking even in my sleep.

" Hey... Look at me love ?" I opened my eyes to see those blue eyes and wild hair. In a quick motion I pinned him to the sofa and placed my lips against his. "Mm what has you in this mood?"

" My love for you that is keeping me sane." I smirked slightly before moving my lips to his jawline. His hands running down my sides.

"I know Tara... I saw your laptop." I froze and looked into his icy blue eyes. "Why didn't you tell me you accepted a mission?"

"Because I needed to see your smile for as long as possible in case I don't make it back."

"Stop saying that..." He mumbled before pressing his lips to mine. "You'll make it back."

"Not without my dad and mom if she's alive." He flipped us over and kissed along my neck. It was needy, I could tell, but I felt the same way. How ever long it would take to hunt my father down was how long I would stay. I had it narrowed down too and a team to help. "Right now I'm just focused on you." I mumbled and pulled at his shirt, the pale skin underneath I covered in kisses and nips. His hair was in disarray more than usual. Carefully I removed the spectacles that adorned his face. We took our time as if this could possibly be the last time we'd lay beside each other or take in each other's scent. Though it could possibly be true. We laid bresthless and naked back in our bunk just in case the others came back early. His soft hair tickled my face as he slept. My arms wrapped around him. He was so peaceful, almost like a child sleeping. I wish it didn't have to end right now. That I wouldn't have to leave the comfort of this warm bunk and body beside me.

Just like that I showered and got dressed before placing a kiss to his lips. I slipped the note onto the shelf in the bunk and sat my ring on top. I wanted it to stay safe. To not be stolen possibly from my body in the case of death. His appearance burned into my brain one last time before I hurried out, duffel bag in hand. In truth I didn't need to leave that very moment. I just knew it was the easiest way to say good bye to the man I loved. My red hair covered carefully by a black haired wig and Crystal blue eyes left alone. I walked through the busy streets and hailed a taxi.

"Where to miss?"

" The airport." I glanced out of the window, looking at the rain hit against the window and blanket beautiful LA in a plain shade of grey. I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed the familiar number. "It's Cleo, I'll be there in a few hours get the planes ready and I want my group already on the plane. I'm trying to make this a quick trip."

"Alright agent." Evans hung up and I placed my head against the window. It was pounding like the thunder. My stomach churned at the thought of him waiting up a note and alone. He'd be 27 in two weeks. I would be 27 in a month. People our age had kids running around and a settlement so to speak. What were we doing you ask? We were playing in this wild world.