snapchat ➵ royce [discontinued]

forty two - 5:01am

alright if you want to, I would like for you to listen to Dope by Fifth Harmony with this chapter.

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Though he have to drive to school in about two hours, Chresanto appears to be restless. After talking with the problematic Jacob on FaceTime for an hour and some change, he crawled in bed. He thought he was pretty tired, even when he laid so comfortably under the covers. To even help him sleep a little, he was on his phone, doing various things such as watching interesting stuff on YouTube and playing a couple of games. Every time he returns to his home screen where an compelling Tumblr photo is a background, he glances at Snapchat to contemplates on chatting with his crush. You know, the high spirited cheerleader, Normani Hamilton.

Him contemplating for so long, made him restless. Chresanto questions himself why he's so nervous on talking with this girl, when people still show him love even when he's not the school quarterback anymore. But as Chresanto too busy questions himself, he already found the answers. The answer is that he doesn't think that Normani's attracted to someone that can have some physical problems. Believe it or not, a couple of times a week, Chresanto sometimes scroll below his Facebook profile to access all the "hope you get better" posts that was written and tagged on his timeline from his peers and family. Keep in mind the timeline posts was flooded on his timeline almost two years ago, so it's kinda old but it doesn't bother him. The public message that he would reread the most is from Normani. He remembers the day the notification was posted on his phone. No, he didn't tap it so quickly because he failed to believe reality. Of course, she knows that he exist. I mean, what cheerleader doesn't know the school's football quarterback?

Chresanto was stunned at what she written on his timeline. It was a heartwarming paragraph with a few emojis, and not to mention, a picture that was attached to the post. An image that Chresanto forgot that he was pictured with his crush. That picture was set as his home screen until he upgraded to a new phone. When he glanced at the picture, it gave him the motivation to talk to her more than casually.

Or at least he thought.

He's afraid that he might be rejected by Normani because the fact he has a disability. The doubtful side of him━which is most of him━can't imagine someone that has some physical disorder dates Normani. Even though at the moment, he can walk without the crutches. He thinks she deserves the better, and he ain't the better. So he doesn't know why he got this little hope. He doesn't even know why he think he'll ask her to prom that's happening a little bit.

As he goes to prom with or without a date, he hopes that he goes without any type of equipment, unlike last year's prom. Sure Chresanto had an amazing time, but he was embarrassed. He didn't like that he dressed pretty sharp that the pair forearm crutches had to ruin the appearance. Justine and Bryson kept assuring him that there was nothing wrong with him. Chresanto isn't the type to complain so constantly when he's not satisfied with anything, but the two friends realized this uneasy, more like insecure, expression that he tried concealing.

Currently, and nonetheless being fully awaken, Chresanto is just looking up somewhere at the dark ceiling. Most part of his room is dim but it's 5am, knowing at any minute, the sun start and gently reach it's way up in the sky. As the room is dark and silent, Chresanto's mind is bright and loud. It's quite impossible for him to abandon away the thoughts for a second. Everything and everyone he cares about is filling up all the space in his mind. Of course, this is not even the only night he stays up without being tired. This is almost like a routine. And later on in the day, he don't become tired, sometimes and somehow. 

Like if he wants a nap, he would like for that nap to last a week. That's very impossible but, that's how Chresanto feels.

As he slightly turn his head to absentmindedly look at the black overcasted ceiling, over his peripheral vision, he noticed his phone was glowing. That's odd because look what time it is. Curiously as he were, Chresanto directs his head at the nightstand in alert and try to glance at what notification an app pushed... at this time of morning. It was a little more shocking when he seen the app that giving him a couple of notifications. Snapchat.