Mind Bottles

Guilt Trip

Liza took my hand and guided me to Goat's car. I sat in the back seat crying and Liza was hugging me and rubbing my head.

"I know, I know" she said softly.

I just cried in pain. I looked out the window and saw Goat and Cameron arguing and pushing each other. Goat then walked away and got into his car. He sped out of the parking lot.

"Damn nigga, watch how you're driving a bitch not trying to die today!" Liza yelled to him.

I slightly chuckled and Liza lifted my head up with her hands.

"You're too pretty to be crying over a nigga." She said as wiping my tears. I slightly smiled and Goat looked back at us every time we hit a red light.

"You cool, Ana?" He asked as I got out of his car holding Liza's hand.

"Yeah. Thanks Gabriel." I replied

His eyes widened and he slightly smiled and then pulled off.

I laid in bed with Liza all day. She brought me dinner and forced me to eat even though I felt too weak to. It was about 3 in the morning when my phone began to vibrate. I answered and heard Goat's voice. He told me to come outside. I did as told and I saw Goat leaning up against his car.

"You left your keys in my car." Goat said as opening the passenger side door. I only had on socks and sweat pants with a tank top so I didn't really want to walk out but I said fuck it and went. I got into his car and he handed me some keys I didn't even recognize.

"These aren't mines" I said as throwing the keys in the back seat.

"My bad shawty"

"Its cool, just let me out here" I said as we sat at the red light near my house.

"Let's drive and talk. I just want to talk to you like 2 human beings okay?"

"Okay but make it quick."

"So I took your advice and shit and guess who's now a uber driver?" Goat said as smiling

"Oh my gosh, that's awesome Goat"

"Stop sounding like a lil white girl and its not official yet I gotta sign a few papers and shit. But I like it better when you call me by my real name."

"I thought you killed anyone that called you by your first name."

"Anyone but you."

Goat then put his hand on my thigh and I sat there in silence for a second and then looked over at Goat, moving his hand.

"You know I'm in love with Cameron right?" I asked him.

"Yeah, why would you ask that?"

"Then why the fuck do you keep doing this?"

"Doing what? I thought we were just 2 friends having a conversation"

"That is until you put your hand on my fucking thigh"

"I just think you can do better" he said as parking in some random spot. "You settled for a nigga that just hurts you again and again"

"Don't give me that bullshit you fuck every girl you lay eyes on! You only think with the head on your dick!"

Goat sat there in silence for a second looking out the window. He then looked down and back up at me.

"Anastasia. I want you."

"What?"

"I want you. I can treat you better than Cam ever could."

I rolled my eyes and he brought his hand down to my thigh again and began to rub it.

"Just let me" he whispered. "Please let me" he whispered again as kissing my neck.

I looked him in the eyes and gave into temptation. I climbed into the back seat and he followed after me. We kissed intensely. His lips were so soft and gentle. It was like his kisses were breath taking but also breath giving. He started undoing his belt but I stopped him and began to think about Cameron.

"What, what is it?" He asked out of breath.

"I can't." I whispered.

"Why not?"

"I'd feel so guilty if I did this now, Gabriel. Just give me some time? Please?" I asked softly. He nodded and then got back into the front seat. I laid in the back seat thinking about what I was just about to do. And with Cameron's best friend at that. No matter how bad Cameron has hurt me, I could never hurt him like that.