Through the Darkness || Finn&Rey

Chapter 61

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I hope you all love the new cover made by the amazingly talented @_xnaaiiaax_ !! I am so close to finishing pre writing all the chapters, so I should be able to update frequently!
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Luke and Rey converse for a little while, and I focused my attention on Poe, I watch the way his heartbeat runs across the screen and his oxygen pump rises and falls.

It has been silent for a long time now. I can still sense that Luke is in the room as well, but I hope if I don't make eye contact he will quietly leave.
I don't have such luck. "Finn," I turn my attention to him and we look at each other from across the room he still has not moved from the doorway. "I did not intend for any offence," he says sincerely and I can't help raise my brows in surprise.

"We're all good," is all I can think to say, he gives me a questioning look at my choice of words.

"Rey is very special, she needs to be protected, not put in danger," he says clearly, with a hint of accusation.

"I know she is, I do try," I see him open his mouth but he closes it again. He's quiet for a moment.

"She is important to me, and seeing her in this way, does evoke emotions I should supress," he admits, and I flicker my focus to Rey, should she know this? Her eyes have closed, and she seems to already be in a light sleep. I don't notice the way I smile until I look back towards Luke and his stoic look returns, causing me to frown.
"Have you told her that you love her?" He asks. I am unsure if he can sense that I do, or if he is asking for another reason.

"I have," I can't help but smile at someone else knowing the way I feel.

"Did you mean it?" His question doesn't sit well with me.

"Of course, I wouldn't have said it otherwise." I remember the way the words slipped so easily from my lips, like it was a common fact.

"Good, because I don't want to console her while she cries over you, again," I feel my unease grow over knowing I was the reason for her tears, but it develops into a sickening nausea at the thought of crying to Luke... I bet he wouldn't even bat an eyelid if Kylo Ren walked through the door, let alone care that his apprentice had her heart broken.

"I never wanted to be the reason for her tears, I only wanted what was best for her," Luke takes a deep breath.

"Rey seems to be under the impression you are what's best for her."

"I need her, I shouldn't speak for her, but, I know she needs me as well,"

"Finn," Rey mumbles and I look down at her, fast asleep, mouth parted and her eyes twitch slightly behind her eyelids. I can't seem to wipe the grin from my lips, perfect timing. It seems she wants me near her even in her dreams.

"Hmm," Luke's expression is full of contemplation as he turns around and exits the dimly lit room.

I have the urge to hold Rey, pull her onto me and have her sleep in my lap, but I know I can't do that.
I also have the desire to make her feel as good as she did on the vanity in the hotel. I know I shouldn't think about that while she's in so much pain, but I can't help but see a resemblance in her peacefully state now and the way she looked while I touched her. My mind wanders to new places, other ways I could make her feel that way, I feel small knots start to die deep inside. I lick my lips, my mouth dry. My inappropriate thoughts are interrupted as Rey tries to turn to lie on her side. Her expression changes from one of peace to one of dreary anguish. She squeezes her closed eyes and whimpers in pain before turning to lie on her back again. I rub my thumb across her hand in a soothing manner. But she doesn't wake.

I watch her as she sleeps and my stomach starts to grumble at me, and I slip my hand carefully from Rey's and decide to go in search of some food.
I glance back at Poe and Rey before closing the door and hobbling out of the infirmary.

The dining hall has been destroyed, the tables flipped and the chairs broken, the food supple ransacked. It is extremely busy with everyone who is capable of assisting in its tidying. I steal a piece of fruit from the crate sitting near the conveyor belt.

"Finn," I turn in the direction of the sound to see Starla dusting her hands together after sorting through what's left of the food, she approaches me.

"Hey," I greet her calmly.

"May I have a word?" She requests drearily.

"Sure," I take a bite of my fruit as I follow her out of the busy hall. She looks flustered, her hair is messy and her eyes are bloodshot.

"Are you feeling okay?"

"I'll be fine, it's the infirmary. We're swamped-" she takes a breath so I interrupt.

"Do you need my help?" I query, and she sighs heavily.

"That is what I was going to ask. There are so many people who are injured, especially the rookies, they weren't ready, not for such intense combat, their bodies aren't used to the force of gravity yet, their muscles have gone into shock."

"Okay," I accept, but she doesn't seem to acknowledge me.

"Not to mention the blaster wounds, and the broken bones-"

"Starla," I say firmly, "Okay," her eyebrows twitch in appreciation.

"Thank you," she stutters over the words, I take a note from her book and don't respond, not wanting to draw attention to what she just said. Instead I envelop her in my arms her head resting on my torso; she really is tiny. I do not say anything, nor do I move, I just holding her close, and she seems to melt into me slightly.

"How's Rey?" she mutters into my shirt after a long moment.

"Exhausted," Starla nods against my chest.

"Poe's in a bad way," I voice the words for the first time, and it makes me nervous.

Starla pulls out of my arms and straightens her medical uniform, "I know," she doesn't meet my eye. "We don't know just how bad the damage will be until he regains consciousness." I close my eyes, I don't know how he will cope if he won't be able to fly again.

"How would you like me to help?" I query, taking my mind away from the worst case scenarios.

"Rehabilitation: the nurses are too busy to teach the rookies and injured squads how to regain their strength and movement. The only person here whom has gone through a similar type of muscle trauma, is you." I can't help but feel slightly honoured that I could be considered eligible to teach them.

"I can do that, when do I start?"

"Tomorrow?" her voice rises in a questioning manner.

"Tomorrow is fine with me. I have some conditions," I add and Starla raises an eyebrow waiting for me to explain. "I get told the moment Poe wakes up," Starla smiles and nods.

"Easy," She says happily,

"And Rey and I get our old room back," Starla shakes her head.

"No," I flinch back and snort in confusion.

"Why?" I didn't think my request was unreasonable.

"You don't want to stay here, you haven't from the moment you woke up-"

I interrupt her, and she groans – old habits never die. "Rey wants to stay." I state firmly.

"Will you ever let me finish my sentences?" She grumbles and I shake my head, and she sighs in exasperation. "You two can stay together; we wouldn't dream of separating the two of you," I smile. "The General has been in the process of organising a housing unit at the back of base for weeks. That way you won't feel like you're part of the First Order, and Rey in still able to have contact with everyone here so she won't feel alone like she did on Jakku." I guess that is what the General meant when she said I always had a place here.

"Sothis has been planned for a while?" Starla smiles and then nods.

"The General is very capable of seeing past our facades," How did she know I would return? All I've done since I arrived is leave again. Starla notices theway I seem withdrawn. "She wasn't certain, but she knew from the moment she metyou, Rey is tethered to you and you always find a way back together. Shethought having a place set for you would be encouragement so you know you'rewelcome,"

I feel as though I must thank her, for her consideration and forward thinking."What do Rey and I do in the mean time?"

"There is a spare bed in that room for a reason. It for you, it didn't takemuch thought to know you wouldn't want to be apart from Poe and Rey," Everythinghas been thought out and planned and I've been oblivious to all of it. "Plus,you'll be up bright and early to start rehab, won't you?" She raises a brow andI smile

"Yeah, I will,"

"For now, you can always help clean up the military compound, half that mess isyour fault," She laughs, but I'm don't really understand what she means.