Beautiful Scars (A Jack Barakat Fanfic)

13). Josh Dun Sass Master.

*A/N* I said I would start devoting chapters to people who vote and comment but I keep forgetting. So I'm just going to devote chapters to a whole bunch of you who have commented.

Also I was typing this so fast my brother called me I quote a. 'Keyboard Warrior' and then asked if 'There was an extreme emo crisis on tumblr'

Nora's POV

The sunsets starting to fall below the horizon and I know I should go home but I can't bring myself to face them. My parents always have the best intentions, just sometimes it hurts. I'm a coward, I can't face my problems, I can't stop taking drugs. So instead I'm sitting under a fucking bridge I'm too afraid to throw myself off.

"Hey." I hear someone say, their voice soft and somewhat familiar. Looking up from my place in the long grass, I spot Josh, he's standing on the road his newly dyed hair sticking up.

"Hey." I mimic trying my best to sound normal but what kind of normal person spends their time under a bridge.

"What are you doing down there?" He asks, sliding down the grass slope and most likely staining his shoes. I always thought Josh was shy but right now he's talking, maybe he was just anxious all the time.

"What were you doing up there?" I continue, my voice sounding more sarcastic than intended. He's standing beside me now, a back pack slung over his shoulder, and his crazy red eyeliner running. I'm not sure if Josh has been crying or if the wind has made it run, still it makes him look cooler.

"Thinking."

"Thinking about what? Sorry, I feel like I'm being annoying." I tell him staring up, he's still standing there like he's unsure on why he walked down.

"No you're not." He replies before sighing and continuing. "I was thinking about dying."

I want to laugh at that, a cruel sadistic laugh, because I didn't realize anyone felt the same. "Same" was the only thing I was able to choke out. His face seems to soften after I said that and he dumps his bag beside me before sitting down.

"So why do you want to die?" He asks, digging his foot into the ground below us.

"I don't know I just manage to fuck everything up. I ruined the best relationship I've ever had because of drugs, and now I'm going crazy. I blacked out today, punched a mirror without realizing it. I guess to put things short I'm 50 shades of fucked up." I summarize, not wanting to bore Josh with my problems, especially since he seemed to have a lot too.

"I'm sorry I asked." He mumbles.

"It's no problem. So what about you, if I you don't mind me asking." I smile but it's weak.

"I don't really have a story like you. It's just depression. I'm not sure this will get any better, and I'm starting to wonder if it will get better." He admits his voice more hushed.

"We're you going to jump?" I suddenly cut in through the silence, making him stare at me frowning.

"I don't know. I'm usually too much of a coward to end my own life."

"It's weird that we hang onto the things causing us pain." I wisely note, making myself sound like one of those tumblr quotes.

"Maybe we like pain because it makes us know we're alive and have a soul?" He adds, the corners of his mouth twitching as a I crunch up my nose at the cheesiness of the conversation.

"I feel like we're romanticizing death now. Life isn't a poem where we can talk about the end like it's beautiful." I put in, making Josh smile. I don't understand why he's smiling but I like his smile, I don't understand why he would want to put an end to that smile.