Sha Qing

Chapter 131: The Last Killer (5)

Leo once again sat on the edge of the bed and gazed at the gradually thinning face of the unconscious man lying on the hospital cot.

"Is it really true that you, yourself, don't want to wake up, Sha Qing?" he whispered, "Why? Because of me? Because of your past? Or is it because of this 'fucked-up world' as you call it? Has this world disappointed you so much that you now disdain it to the point where you don't even want to open your eyes?"

There was no response.

But Leo always felt that it wasn't that simple. The truth was hidden in the deepest part of Sha Qing's heart, and he(L)had been searching for it from between his(SQ)ambiguous words, actions and attitude, as if groping for gold in the sands of the Ganges River. He knew that Sha Qing was skilled in disguise, acting, and reversing the truth between black and white, but he had a vague hunch that somewhere, at a small negligible place, Sha Qing left a slight crack in the door for him, a tiny gap to Sha Qing's inner world, just like the book "Bedside Whispers".

I will find that crack and push open that door. Leo said wordlessly to Sha Qing.

You won't be disappointed again this time. I will find you, who is hiding behind that door, and take you out.

He got up and left the ward, but didn't go to the office. Instead, he went straight back to his apartment in Manhattan.

Leo lied on the sofa where they once nestled together, and he felt like there was still a lingering warmth from that time.

He closed his eyes and quietly recalled.

Recalled the memories between him and Sha Qing:

--From the first time he heard that name...

--Every word...

--Every look...

--Every fight...

--Every bit of tacit understanding...

--Every love-hate confrontation between them...

It was like a long film scrolling past his eyes, each frame wiping the dust, polishing the memories so brightly.

It turned out that everything had been so deeply imprinted in his mind and heart, that even the fleeting details of the scene made his body tremble uncontrollably.

--How much of an idiot was he, that he had to spend so much time and effort just to realize how important that man was to him? To only recognize it just now that "God's is to God, Caesar's is to Caesar" were nothing but an absurd and ridiculous words of self-deception?

--If he truly loves him, he should have the courage to fight against the world, because every ounce of pain that person will feel, he'd feel it too.

--How could he have the heart to throw him into a dark and rotting prison and destroy that person's "freedom", the inherent right of every human, with his own hands?

Leo's eyes opened and tears rolled down his deep, inky blue eyes, flowing along his brow into his temples.

""

Then, the words of Sha Qing emerged from the countless memories- it was something he said right before.... before he force himself on Sha Qing, the incident that has been filling him with remorse ever since:

"By the way, have you received my belongings that were sent to your address? Please keep it for me for now and don't throw it all away out of anger, especially the phone..."

Especially the phone.

Yes, this is that tiny gap to that door of truth.

But how did he respond at the time?