Trashes of the Counts' Families || Trash of the Count's Family || OC

19

But when Adara looked at the kittens, who Hans had picked up during the tour, she could see that they seemed to be disappointed as well. But Choi Han seemed not to care about the prettiness of the Ancient Ruins. He bowed his head like the others who were praying and mumbled words under his breath. Adara didn't listen. She wanted to let him have this for himself.

Though, she had a slight suspicion he was praying to return to Korea.

Choi Han lived in a happy family environment. He was not like her and Kim Rok Soo. She did not know much about Kim Rok Soo, but he seemed lonely. But she did know much about herself, though she sometimes wished she didn't. Choi Han was someone who had not been surrounded by narcissists and cowards. Narcissists, who ignored you because they thought they were better, or because you were worthless, who— when they weren't ignoring you— commented on every single movement you did with distaste and shame. Cowards, who refused to talk to you properly, disguising their disgust and uncomfortableness behind a nervous smile. She hated showing her face whenever she was in that godsforsaken house, she could not even call it her home, because that it was not. Choi Han did not live like that. He had grown up with positive influences in a house he called home. With people he called family. She envied him. She couldn't help it. Why was he able to get the good backstory? I'm only a side character, I'm not even in the book, only mentioned. Why could the author not give me a nice family? Why did he get it? Why didn't I?

But she kept her feeling out of her eyes as Choi Han lifted his head back up and made eye contact with them. "Cale-nim, Adara-nim."

"What?" they asked, synchronising.

"I have a question and something to report."

Adara couldn't guess what he wanted to ask, nor what he wanted to report. But she had a bad feeling.

Cale, seeing she made no move to talk, instead spoke. He too had a bad feeling. "Start with your question.

He hesitated. Turning to look at the Ancient Rock Towers, he made a small motion to them. "Cale-nim, Adara-nim, are you not going to make a wish?"

Adara laughed at herself internally. And she was worried about what he would ask? "I do not make wishes."

"Me either," Cale casually answered, matching her tone.

"Why not?"

They shrugged, their expressions off-handed but their voices serious. "It makes you have higher expectations." She could remember all the times she had sat down before her bed when she still believed that the gods were benevolent. She remembered the days she had spent, the months, the years, waiting for her prayers to come true. Waiting for her wish to be granted. She was aware of Choi Han and Hans staring at them. She was even aware of the kittens. But Adara and Cale only kept their eyes on the rock towers as they continued to speak in a low, slow tone. "It's so much easier to live without high expectations."

Hans smiled. He smiled widely. He always smiled widely, but this time it was different than usual. But Adara could not tell what had changed. "You are right, Young Master and Mistress. There is no such thing as dreams or hope in this world."

In this world, she repeated, still staring at the rock towers. She could feel herself starting to disassociate and she wanted to stop herself. This world isn't real. But she couldn't. It's all made up. In some writer's head. He made this all up. We aren't real, she thought, still staring at the rock towers but thinking about Hans. You and I. We are not real. Kim Rok Soo is. He is real. But Cale Henituse is not. Nobody is real. Especially not Adara Thornwin. Her thoughts continued on, spiralling down. Until she felt something warm grab her hand. She blinked. She turned her head quickly, feeling as if her neck had snapped. Cale had grabbed her hand. He squeezed reassuringly it, bringing her out of her distant state. He realised...