547 days

Pain and cravings

I'm in so much pain. I just wanna cuddle next to Lorenz I'm craving him a lot today.
Started my period and I've never had cramps this bad in years. It feels like I'm going to be sick. I've got a hot flush and I am breathless, finding it hard to breathe. My breasts hurt, my lower back. I've got a headache. I had paracetamol but I am tempted to get my mum to pick me up.  - 10:00am

——
I am struggling. The paracetamol has kicked in and my cramps aren't as bad as they were but they're still bad 😩 I remember Lorenz saying ages ago he was looking into this cramp device thing that you put on your belly and I'm not being funny, now would have been a perfect time for it 😭😭 I want it😭 I also want that giant lolly he got me yesterday.

I managed to see my patient, with difficulty, but I've stepped out for this third patient, I need to sit down properly. I can't function at all. Think I'm gonna eat my chocolate now. Fuck the diet. Might go to Lidl to get myself a brownie and a muffin and some snickers ice cream too. I want pizza as well. Warm food would help with my cramps lol.

I've just ate my kinder bueno and I'm seriously craving some donuts from a dessert place near me, I went to last week. The best donuts I've had after Morrison donuts. Omg I want Morrison donuts too. Think I'm gonna cry cos I want all the dessert in the world and I can't cos I'm in some small village in the middle of no where. I want Lorenz to bring me a massive bag full of my favourite things and him included cos he's my favourite 😭❤️

The cleaner just walked in on me stuffing my face with my second kinder bueno and she goes 'hungry?' And I'm like "I'm very hungry" she has no idea, I could eat an entire house full of food right now. I feel bad cos I think I'm getting fat but at the same time I don't care lol like why do calories exist.

——
Seen my last patient of the morning, she was so cute. A 4 year old. We saw the mum of this patient last week and as she was leaving today, she told my supervisor both me and Honey are really good so that was so nice to hear.
I was struggling the entire time though my cramps are back and it's radiating down to my
Leg and back😭 I'm waiting for Honey to get ready so we can go to the shop so I can buy some sanitary towels as I didn't bring any with me a part from one I had, and so I can buy some snacks. I am craving a hot drink but caffeine is really bad for cramps when you're on. Anyways, that's me done. Really want to tell Lorenz I want him lol like I want that interstellar date and cuddle up but I won't lol. - 12:02pm