try-hard •sunki au•

fifty-nine

Sunoo already knew he'd see Riki's proud smile plastered on his lips from the moment he realized he actually sent the text message last night. He thought he made a mistake sending the text.

"Can I hear it?"

"Hear what?" Sunoo asked, playing innocent.

"The last message you sent me last night," Riki said.

"Goodnight?"

"No, the other one."

"Riki, we're here to talk about something more important than that," Sunoo said, looking away.

"The grand stand isn't a good place to talk about something important," Riki argued. "Can't you see the students sitting near us?"

Sunoo looked around. There were mostly couples sitting beside them.

Grand stand is a place known for students to date in between classes, or for students to review if they don't like being in the library.

The wind here smells fresh and since it's almost summer, Sunoo wanted to experience stopping by at least once. It wasn't his intention to bring Riki with him, it's only a coincidence that they needed to talk about something today.

"It's a place to date," Riki said again.

"Excuse me? People used this place to review, too," Sunoo argued.

"It's completion week," Riki said. "Can you spot anyone reviewing? Sunoo, we're all couples here."

"We?" Sunoo asked, offended.

"Okay, maybe not us," Riki said. "But I think all of them are couples."

Sunoo heaved a sigh.

This conversation is leading nowhere.

+++

Jungwon bopped the nose of the sleeping kitten on the table.

"I can't take it to the dorms," Jungwon said, staring sadly at the kitten. "Pets are not allowed."

"What do we do, then?" Jay asked. "If it stays in the apartment, Riki and Sunghoon will sometimes forget to feed it. Engene will starve to death."

"I thought you'd still visit from time to time?" Jungwon asked.

"Yeah, because if I don't there's a huge possibility that Riki will end up burning the whole house," Jay said. "But since I'm taking over a very busy position..."

"Should we just find Engene another family?" Jay then asked.

Jungwon didn't answer as he kept staring at the kitten. It used to be so small, shivering into the cold street and asking random people for food. Jungwon has been giving it warm milk for weeks before it got adopted by Jay.

Now, Jay can't handle the kitten anymore. As much as Jungwon wanted to keep it, he can't violate the dorm rules.

"Or..." Jay speaks, carefully analyzing Jungwon's reaction to his words. "You and Sunoo move in on the apartment."

Jungwon looked up, surprised.

"Jake and Heeseung's room will be empty, you can have it," Jay continued. "Then, you can have Engene to yourself."

"I have to ask Sunoo first," Jungwon said, feeling dejected again.

"Okay," Jay said, nodding. "I hope Riki was enough reason for Sunoo to agree."

I think not, Jungwon thought but didn't say anything.

+++

Riki removed his hand from Sunoo's as he took the lollipop off his mouth.

The older boy looked down on his now free hand. He was already used to Riki holding it every time they were together. It didn't take a while before Riki's hand held it again.

"Why? Do you regret getting popsicles instead of a mint flavored tub of ice cream?" Riki asked.

They were heading outside the cafeteria. Riki didn't like staying on the grandstand longer so they decided to leave. Now, Sunoo feels...lost.

There was a reason why he chose the grandstand as a place to talk to Riki. It was honestly not just a coincidence.

Grandstand...is a place for couples.

"Riki."

"Hm?"

"When do you plan on meeting your Dad?" Sunoo curiously asked.

"Depends," Riki said. "When do you plan on going home?"

They continued walking through the pathway without any destination in mind.

"Next week, the last day of May," Sunoo said.

"Then I'll meet my Dad on the first day of June," Riki shrugged. "I hope he's not busy enough to not see me."

Sunoo kept silent, contemplating whether he'll continue the conversation he planned on his mind last night. The pathway isn't the right place to do it.

"Riki."

"Hm?"

Sunoo swallowed hard, as if he's swallowing his pride with it.

"I'm afraid everything between us will change once I go back home," Sunoo confessed, making Riki stop on his tracks.

Sunoo stopped walking as well, looking back at the freshman.

"Last night, I sent you the words you've been wanting to hear," Sunoo continued. "Because I'm afraid that it will be the last time I can send it to you."

"Why are you saying all this stuff?" Riki confusedly asked.

"Because it can be the last time we'll see each other, we never know."

Sunoo looked down as he felt the strain of hot liquid running down his cheeks. Riki pulled him closer, hugging him tight, in the middle of an empty pathway.

Sunoo got a flashback of the enragedness in his father's eyes after all those moments he had asked him of his sexuality. Sunoo has a doubt that his father will accept him like this...gay.

He was afraid that once he got home, his father would force him to enter military...or something. Take him away from this city, away from Riki.

"This was not what I imagined it to be," Sunoo spoke again. "But you hated the grandstand, so here we go..."

Sunoo hugged the younger boy back, "Riki..."

Riki didn't speak.

"Before everything else..." Sunoo heaved a sigh.

"Can you be my boyfriend?" Sunoo asked.

tengyu_