STILL WITH YOU (JIKOOK)

45.

Jungkook's pov:

'Thank you so much, mrs. Lee! Thank you for being the most wonderful and loyal secretary. If you didn't come to me the day ,my mom blackmailed you and narrated me the whole scenario, I would have lost my husband forever without knowing what happened to him.' I thanked her whole heartedly, appreciating her loyalty towards me. It was because of her, how I got my jimin back from my mom's trap. She thought I wouldn't know where she was and what was she upto but her own brainy tactics led me to her.

Like she had threatened my secretary to install voice tapping app on my phone in return of her daughter's safety, I intentionally installed it myself, letting her listen to my every conversations, and making my secretary personally report my activities to my mom.

And even today's morning, I made her report to my mom about me leaving to jimin's location. The last time, when jimin disappeared, he told me mom had forcefully taken him to the orphanage so it was a piece of cake for me to know what was cooking under her sleeve.

And to ensure she won't get any chances to escape, I had already called police over to the scene. She was guilty for what she did to taehyung and her secretary's confession made it more easier.

Some kind of honesty or own's sense of guilt compelled him to take that step or something but what he did, turned out to be good for everybody.

I was sorry since I stayed quietly in the orphanage when he was forcefully being dragged by my mom. I should have saved him from getting hurt but I didn't as I had to let my mum think, her plan had become successful till the end.

'It's not a big deal, sir! Besides you have done so much for me. Do take care of your husband. He seems weak. You may come to office after some days.' She politely bowed and left, turning her heels around.

I peeked at jimin opening the door a bit. He was sleeping soundly. I had a lot to say but couldn't disturb him, hence I walked downstairs and went to the lawn to get some fresh air.

A/n's pov:

His eyes fluttered open, his right palm over his scalp....he got up at once when the very familiar ceiling came to his view.

He was in jungkook's room, his tears involuntarily spilled as he scanned his surrounding.

Though he grew some courage to talk back to mrs. jeon, he realized he was the same jimin as before recalling how paralysed he felt when he was being dragged by her.

Fragile and powerless, his heart had come to his mouth when mrs. jeon was taking him back to the orphanage.

How naive he was to think that his fear had ebbed away by going through the same thing over and over again. He had not grown numb rather he had become more sensitive and doubtful. He had become more vulnerable making him an easy target.

And even after being saved and brought to the house by jungkook, his tears had no end to them.

Why? Just why? He had no answer to that. Maybe he was meant to suffer throught his life. Maybe he really was undeserving of anyone's love. May be he didn't deserve a family for real, maybe every vicious and wicked words he recieved from orphanage staffs and jungkook's mom about him were actually true and maybe he was nothing more than some sort of trash like everybody said.

He shifted a bit upwards and leaned his pale body on the headboard. His eyes reached to the window pane and he smiled with no reason. Maybe he really had gone crazy that he was smiling in such condition.

He knew the exact words jungkook would say to him later on. Jungkook would again tell him to expect nothing from him except the loyalty. And after pitying over his state and being good to him for few days, he would once again throw a fit, get mad at him and chant jin's name.

Jungkook was and would always be whipped about jin and he would be nothing but a valueless object  who will not be taken care of, rather ignored.

Jimin threw a fit at jungkook, telling him how he loathed him, hated him but he couldn't resist calling him as he wanted to listen his voice.

Maybe he somehere expected to hear jungkook saying him to 'come back' but that never happened instead his call was hunged up.

Jungkook's presence had become an essence of his dull life. He had grown fond of the older's voice, his eyes, his scent and his presence. And he wished the same from jungkook too. Maybe he was bit selfish for wanting jungkook to be whipped by him but his heart wanted what it wanted.

He can't deny he was fed up of jungkook's attitude that he decided to leave the place where he was currently at but he also couldn't deny the way his heart pounded when jungkook was the one who held his hand so delicately, and brought him to the house and even made him sleep in his room. But jungkook was unpredictable to him. He would be dragged and thrown out of the room whenever jungkook chooses to and that's what was eating him up.

His chain of thoughts broke when jungkook timidly entered the room. Jungkook approached jimin with light steps, pulling a bamboo chair with him and settled beside the bed, opposite to where jimin was facing.

Jimin's pov:

'How are you feeling?' Jungkook asked me while stretching his neck to look over my face or expression. I could see what he was doing from my side eye view.

'Fine!' I tediously answered and slided down, burying myself under the quilt.

I wasn't ready to face jungkook and hear him.

Jungkook would never love me, it was high time for me to engrave it in my head and not come in his way of loving whom he wanted.

'Do you feel cold?' His voice carried this bit worry or maybe not. I had no idea.

He turned the ac off and I could feel the bed being dipped. He lifted the quilt up and turned my head towards him.

I flinched as we had never come that close even for once.

'It must have been hard for you, isn't it?' I nodded and broke down, crying and shaking my head violently. He engulfed me, shushed me, planting a small kiss on my earlobe.

'I am so sorry, I am so sorry. I admit I am a jerk and an asshole for inflicting pain to you. I have no excuses. I was simply a snob. And I again selfishly beg for your forgiveness. I am so sorry.' He mumbled while rubbing my back.

He planted a feathery kiss on my lips' corner and looked at me the way I had yearned for.

He continued to shush me, but he didn't know I was crying more and more with his every loving and caring gestures.

I was crying as I was overwhelmed. I have wished for million times to the almighty, for him to willingly take me in his arms and make me feel safe with his warmth.

And as it had finally happened, the sensation overcame my internal affliction and I wished for that moment to never end.

But it had been late, too late! I was not the same jimin as before. I was different, utterly different. And I felt that when I wasn't hugging him back.

The hesitation in me was stopping me from doing so. Who knows when he will be hurting me with his words for the nth time.

I had become hopeless. I couldn't trust him again. It would shred my heart into pieces if I would be ignored again after trusting him with my feelings and I didn't want that.

I didn't want to feel any emotions anymore. I wanted to become sore. I wanted to be numb but agony was written on my fate, I guess!....I felt what every other human felt even when I was not treated like one.

'I hate to love you, jungkook!' I murmured, staying limp in his hold.