Midnight Stalker (Completed)

Midnight 72 - Happy

Midnight (72)

"Yan..."

"Huh? Yeah?" I forced a smile. I was trying to remember what Ash was saying earlier but I couldn't.

"Yan, you don't have to force yourself to go on a date with me if you're not okay," he said. His eyes looked apologetic. His tone was really worried, too.

Hinawi ko ang kamay ko bago nagpilit muli ng ngiti. "No, no! I'm okay!"

Tinignan lang niya ako ng matagal. Pagkatapos ay ngumiti siya ng malungkot bago niya inilipat ang kanyang tingin sa tanawin sa harapan namin.

We are currently on a date in Tagaytay. Hindi ko alam exactly kung saan pero nakikita ko ngayon ang Taal. Outdoor roof top restaurant siya tapos picnic-style ang seats. Walang tao sa restaurant kung hindi kaming dalawa lang. Hindi ko alam kung hindi lang ba talaga mabenta, o baka inupahan ni Ash.

"You haven't even touched your food, Yan. Pangatlong date na natin na ganyan ka," he said, still looking at the view in front of us.

"S-Sorry," bulong ko. Nagpilit akong magsubo ng fries.

Simula nung araw na tumawag si Zarek at nalaman ko yung sasapitin ni papa, hindi na ako naka-concentrate sa kahit ano o sa kahit saan. Paulit-ulit sumasakit ang ulo ko at halos walang laman ang isipan ko kung hindi 'yun lang.

Sa trabaho, kung hindi siguro si Ash ang boss ko, matagal na akong natanggal. Hindi ko kasi nagagawa ng tama yung trabaho. I would always be there, but my mind was always somewhere else. Alam kong napapansin na ni Ash 'yun, pero hindi ko rin magawang ayusin ang sarili ko.

Sobrang miserable ko rin sa mga dates namin ni Ash. Nalilimutan ko lagi na may date pala kami, kaya kadalasan ay naca-cancel lang. Tuwing matutuloy naman, hindi ako nakakakain. Minsan, hindi ko rin siya nakakausap ng maayos.

All I think about were my dreams—and how bad they were. It was so unfair to Ash. He was obviously trying his best to understand my situation. I just feel bad for him, for us. It was never my intention to be this way. I just couldn't stop myself from thinking too much.

"I-I'm sorry, Ash. I'm really s-sorry," I said, almost sobbing again. I hate myself.

Tuwing may date kami, lagi nalang akong ganito. Sobrang emotional tapos biglang iiyak nalang ng walang katuturan. It's becoming a huge pain. Nakakahiya na kay Ash.

He brought me here to appreciate the view and to have a silent atmosphere. Pero hindi ko man lang ma-appreciate ang lahat. I am so miserable. Agh!

"Yan," bulong ni Ash. Hinawakan niya ang kamay ko at medyo pinisil ito. Medyo napapaos rin ang kanyang boses nang tinawag niya ang pangalan ko.

"You can go..." nabasag ang boses ni Ash sa sinabi niya. Awtomatiko akong napatingin sa kanya.

"What are you saying, Ash?" kinakabahan kong tanong.

Mula sa tanawin sa harapan namin ay mabagal ang pagbalik niya ng tingin sa akin. Wala siyang sinabi pero ramdam ko ang sakit sa kanyang mga mata. I started tearing up upon looking at his stares. He's hurting... for sure, because of me, again.

"You are legally Rylee Reyes now. You don't need to hold back anymore."

My mouth parted at his words. Binaba ko agad ang tingin ko sa aking mga daliri habang kinukurot ko ang mga ito. Anong nangyayari? Was he letting me go? Bakit?

Ang sakit na naman bigla ng ulo ko. Napapikit ako ng mariin.

Mamaya pa ay naramdaman ko ang kanyang yakap mula sa aking likuran. For a moment, none of us were talking. It was just the wind and the silence that was surrounding us. Naramdaman ko ring tumulo ang aking luha.