Little Bella ( Twilight Fanfic )

Chapter 23. ( Unavoidable )

He was sitting in the darkness alone. He didn't need the light to see. It was more proof that he wasn't one of them, that he didn't belong with them. He was doomed to live alone. The only thing that gave his life meaning was his skill as a doctor, his ability to take care of them. He didn't need to sleep, was never worn out, couldn't get sick himself and had more medical knowledge than ten doctors had together. In a way he was the perfect doctor. He could even find it in himself to care about them, to understand their needs and to feel for them. People tended to like and respect him, but there was always that gap, that unbridgeable gap. He had controlled his bloodlust to the point he barely felt it, but now instead of the scent of blood his loneliness burned his troth. If people thought torture was bad then they never had to suffer through being alone every single day of their eternal life. The loneliness scorched his heart with unbearable pain. He sighed and stood. Now that the darkness had fallen, he could get to work.

Death was surrounding him everywhere. His compassionate nature made him fill with sorrow. The disease was spreading fast and there was nothing he could do, but ease their suffering. Their coughs and death sputters were everywhere. After all his years in medical training, he still stood helpless against this. He walked in between the beds, checking on one or two patients that were about to die. In those last moments of their lives, he was so close to them but still so far away. Lately he couldn't keep his thoughts from the idea of turning one of the dying humans into a vampire. If he could make a companion for himself he wouldn't be so alone. If the human was dying anyway, it wouldn't be so bad, would it?

He walked on to the two patients that had somehow attracted his attention. It was a boy and his mother. He didn't know why he was so drawn to these specifics patients. Was it because the mother held on her last shred of life impossibly long to make sure her son was alright? If a mother loved her son that much he had to be something special, a person worthy of saving. The problem was that he wasn't really saving him, condemning him was a better word. Could he really do that to an innocent boy, throw him in an eternal life of drinking blood and walking in the shadows? Wouldn't the boy prefer death? There was a time when he definitely preferred death above what he had become. At that time he had relentlessly tried to take his own life, but now he was less sure. He had found a way to live that didn't consume him with hatred for himself. The only thing that destroyed him now was his solitude.

He watched the boy's face, it was peaceful, accepting the fate that lingered so close. No, he couldn't do it to the boy. He couldn't put him through all that pain and suffering for his own selfish reasons.

Next to him he heard the mother cough painfully. He turned to her and knew immediately she was close to death.

'Please, I beg you, save my son.' She said with her last strength.

It were not her words that drew him in. He bowed over her and looked in her face. Her look was knowingly and certain. She stared at him in a way that went straight in his soul. In that moment he was completely sure she knew exactly what he was. She grabbed his hand desperately to pull him even closer.

'Please, you must do everything you can for him.' She emphasized the word everything.

He stared at her in complete astonishment. She knew what he was and still wanted him to save her son. For a short moment he wondered why she didn't ask to be saved herself, but he saw quickly that her heart held only love for her son. She didn't care what happened to her as long as her son was safe. How could he deny this beautiful soul her dying wish? Especially when he wanted it for himself desperately.

Her face went white when she breathed her last breaths, but her eyes held no fear, there was even a hint of a sparkle there. He squeezed her hand.