Officially Blake's

CHAPTER 33

CHAPTER 33

NICOLLE'S POV

I felt nothing.

My body was numb and stiff at the same time. My breathing was fast and normal at the same time. My vision was blurred and clear at the same time. I was contradicting myself, definitely. I was experiencing all of these opposite things. I didn’t know it was even possible that you could feel everything when you couldn’t even feel a thing.

I could only look at my phone. I read the text message over and over again.

“Hey.”

I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder and I remembered that i was still alive, that everything that is going on right here was true. I remembered pain, torment, misery.

I looked at the guy in front of me. His face was covered with bruises, cuts, swells. His lips was turned downward. His eyes were filled with concern and sadness. He called my name out but I didn’t respond. I couldn’t speak. I could only look at him. I wanted to tell him what I was feeling. I wanted to shout all over him. I wanted to cry all over him.

Cry.

Oh yes. I wanted so bad to cry, but right at this moment—when I needed to whine and cry like a little bitchy princess—tears just wouldn’t come. When I needed them, these stupid tears couldn’t fucking come.

I’m crazy!

Oh my god! I’m losing my fucking mind all because of one fucking text message!

“Nicolle. Nicolle.”

I could feel his hand on my cheek as he called my name out over and over again. I could hear his faint voice along with the racing of my heart and my abnormal breathing. I was zoning out. And during these times—every time I zone out—a memory rushes to me.

A memory of a car crash.A memory of blood.A memory of me, sleeping.

And then I would just black out. And I did. The last thing I remembered was Blake.

Everything is over.

I think everything is over.

I love you.

***

The first thing I saw when I opened my eyes was Andrew’s face, swollen. My heart jumped in surprise, causing my eyes to widen. “An…Andrew… You’re… What happened?” I managed to say.

He only smiled at me. He helped me sit on the couch and he sat on the carpet in front of me.  “You were out for about five minutes and you—“

“Oh my god!” I shouted as everything sank into me again. Panicking, I searched for my phone. Once I looked at the screen of my phone, I dropped it. “So, it was all true?” I asked Andrew as I tried to catch my breath.

He didn’t answer. I looked at him, turning my head slowly. He dropped his gaze to the floor and nodded. When he looked at me, his eyebrows are pulled together to each other. “I…I’m sorry,” he said almost too quietly.

I held his hand and smiled weakly. I shook my head. “Don’t be.”

When he didn’t answer, I continued, “I’ll just go get some air.”

He nodded and smiled at me. I noticed him wince as pain took over when he stretched his lips. I know he’s hurt too, but I couldn’t help but think of myself first. Only this time—just this one time—I wanted to be selfish. I mean to be selfish; to forget about everything else but myself; to think that I am the only one in here.