I'm Not Okay {FIN & EDITING}

{53} Starch Out Laser Tag

I rushed out of the school as soon as the day was done. I don't know why, though. But it felt like there were little demons chasing me away till I was safely out of their way! Or maybe it was just because I wanted to go home, or I was a little excited to play Laser Tag again or maybe because I was going to hang out with Crevan when I didn't want to. While I was opening the door, I remembered the first time I've ever played Laser Tag with my family.

My dad wouldn't tell us where we were going and I started to get impatient, annoyed, and a little tired.

"Dad," I whined, "Are we there yet? I want to go home and go to sleep." I was twelve.

"But that means you'll have to wake up early for school," he said and looked at my through the view mirror.

I rolled my eyes, sat back, and crossed my arms. "I don't want to go to school tomorrow. Everyone's annoying."

"You say the same thing about your brother, Den." My dad used to call me Den when I got mad or annoyed. He knew I loved that nickname, but I told him over and over not to call me that, so he wouldn't see how happy I was with it.

I looked at the window and saw trees passing us fast. "That's different, dad. He's my brother, not a school."

"Yes, but he's annoying too."

"I can hear you, you know?" Eden screamed. He was sleeping. I heard my mother's soft laugh and it made me smile. I looked at him and ruffled his hair. Eden didn't like when someone touched his hair. He thought it was ruining his "amazing" style for a girl he liked and wanted to look like a cool dude, but really, he looked like a baby with a whiny attitude, small teeth and wouldn't shut his mouth for anything.

I looked back out of the window and kept trying to figure out where my father was taking us. I hoped it was a park with a really big roller coasters and my dad would buy Eden candy so I can steal some from him. The thought of candy made my eyes widen with happiness. But then a crushing sound made my head spin and I knew that I was in big trouble. But I didn't expect something bad could happen to us. Not even that my family could take the guilt...

I felt a sharp pain in my back and I hissed. I turned around to see Eden with a beer can in his right hand, wearing a baggy white t-shirt, sweats, and fading bags under his eyes. I forgot I left him home alone. I narrowed my eyes at the beer can and glared at him. He rolled his eyes, knowing what I was thinking.

"Don't worry. I didn't drink it. Dad did. He's here and he's getting worse and worse. Plus, I don't like beers." He walked into the kitchen and I followed behind him. He threw the beer can in the trash and went to the fridge. I grabbed an apple from the fruit bowl and walked to sink to clean it.

"What have you been up to since I was gone?" I asked and took a bite out of my apple.

He shrugged. "Boring. You know I could've gone to school."

I shook my head and said "You looked drained out again. You need to rest and I mean it."

He frowned and walked upstairs. I heard the door opened slowly then some screams and the door slammed shut. Heavy footsteps walked downstairs and Eden looked pissed, but he was trying to control his anger.

"I need to pass the grade so I can get out of here," he said with gritted teeth. I took another bite out of my apple and wiped my mouth with my sweater sleeve. You have no idea how many times I thought of that. I threw away my apple core in the trash can and we stood in silence.

"You think you can survive living with dad for two hours?" I asked and starch my head. I didn't know why I was acting so nervous. It was like I was going on a date with Crevan. We were just going to play Laser Tag and he could quickly take me home. Eden narrowed his eyes at me and his stare was making me even more nervous.

"Why? Where are you going?" He asked. I started biting my thumb nail. It became a habit of mine when I got really nervous. My mom would tell me to stop biting them or I'll end up with getting a bloody finger. I sighed and told him. "I'm going out to play Laser Tag with Crevan."

"Isn't that Cade's big brother?" When Eden said his name, it got me mad and I wanted to run out, go to his house, and beat him up again. But I couldn't. When Eden said his name, he tried to sound disgusted but he didn't do a good job at that. He sounded happy and a little embarrassed.

"You want to come?" I blurted out. Eden just nodded and walked upstairs. I knew Eden was trying to push his feelings away, and he was a lot stronger than me, but if he was going to keep doing that, he would never find happiness.

I bite my lip and groaned. Why did it have to be his enemy?    I changed into a more comfortable shirt and tried to remain calm, but the thought of going out with Crevan made me bite my nails and started shaking my leg a lot. I was a nervous wreck.

"For how long is dad going to keep drinking?" I snapped when I saw Eden go into the kitchen and come out with another beer can.

He shrugged and tried to not care. "I don't know, but I hope he doesn't do this every day."

I snorted and leaned back on the couch. "Why even bother caring? He doesn't give a shit about anything but himself."

"Zayden, he got his heart broken by the woman he loved."

I glared at him and slowly got up. "He got mom. Why does he need another woman?" He opened his mouth to say something, but the door bell rang. He sighed in relief and my glare hardened.

"This isn't over yet," I said coldly. I walked over to the door and opened to see Cade in front of Crevan. Oh hell no.

"Before you say anything, I had to take him because my mom got bitchy that I had sex with a girl again and this is my punishment," Crevan said and threw daggers the back of Cade's head. I didn't know which one I should be mad at. Should I be mad that Crevan had sex with a girl and he said again or he had to bring Cade? I think both.

"What's taking you-" Shit. I felt the anger surrounded us and I knew that I wasn't going to play Laser Tag with Crevan.