Benny couldn't do anything else, kissed her cheeks that were already full of tears, this kiss hurt Frida, she wasn't expecting it. While she saw that he was going away she felt the pressure in her chest, she wanted to break into tears right there.
Benny closed the door of the bedroom and went to sleep to another one but the truth is that he couldn't sleep, his life was shit, he felt the most miserable and despicable in the world, he lived for Frida and his children and that seemed to go lower and lower, those had been the most bitter, long and meaningless weeks he had ever lived.
He felt a great contempt towards Mona, he didn't know how anyone could be such a bad person to destroy a family, although he was also to blame for having accepted to drink with someone who wasn't his wife.
Frida, although she feared the thunderstorms, she had to be strong and avoid being with Benny even if it cost her to suffer, she couldn't be with him, she was too hurt by his fault and it bothered her to have to see him. He had done a horrible damage that she didn't know how to control, she cried silently in her bed, she felt his perfume but he wasn't next to her.
What she most wanted was to tear that pain from her chest and forget him forever, her wings were snatched away, she felt less than nothing. Couldn't do anything else to be with him, to feel that had lost him was the most unpleasant and heartrending feeling she could feel. Her wound was bleeding and her impotence was growing.
•••
Frida and Agnetha were shopping, both really needed it. Frida went to the baby shop to buy some things for Göran, since he came to her life everything had changed, she bought less things for her and more for him. She took some blue bibs with drawings of animals, also bought new baby bottles and clothes while was throwing it in the cart.
Agnetha grabbed a one-piece pajamas for newborn white with green stripes and showed it to Frida, she tried to smile but still you could tell she wasn't very happy yet.
Agnetha: for my baby, —she smiled—.
Frida: don't you think that's too small for Christian?
Agnetha: I didn't say it was for Christian.
Frida stopped, looked at her confused waiting for an answer and looked at Agnetha's hand that was moved to her belly, Frida let out a scream followed by a beautiful smile and threw herself to embrace Agnetha very strong, everything was forgotten for a moment and she could only be happy for her best friend, she knew for everything that had happened and how much she wanted to have another baby.
Frida: congratulations, —kept smiling— you have to tell me everything, how did you find out? How many weeks do you have?
Agnetha: I'll tell you but first we pay for this and then we go to eat something sweet because I have a horrible craving.
Frida nodded and they finished choosing the things they would take, it is as if a part of her sun had illuminated her again, her mood changed and she was more cheerful. They paid for things and went to the food area, while Agnetha was buying cinnamon rolls and water for both of them. Frida looked for a table to sit on, then Anna returned with what she had ordered and sat with her, both took their cinnamon rolls and began to eat.
Frida: how many weeks do you have?
Agnetha: only five weeks, I'm so happy.
Frida: and Björn? I imagine he is very happy.
Agnetha: yes, I didn't know how he was going to react but he almost got crazy.
Frida smiled and her eyes watered, she had a lot of mixed feelings, she was too happy for them but she would also like to have her partner support her, she wanted her story with Benny to have had another ending, when Agnetha realized that she she was about to cry. She got up from her seat and sat with her while hugging her.
Agnetha: sorry, I didn't want to make you sad.
Frida: no, I'm not... forgive me, I'm too happy for you but I still can not get over it all ended between Benny and me.
Agnetha: no, not everything is over, I still hope that everything is solved and Benny is going to make an effort for that.
Frida: no, Anna... things won't be the same anymore, nothing and the thousands of efforts he makes will be worth it. For more than two months we haven't been together and although I have done too much, our union has already broken down and the only thing that unites us are our children.
Agnetha: I love you both and it hurts me to see you like that, I would like to do anything to help you.
Frida: let's talk about you and your pregnancy, I can't believe it !! I'm going to be an auntie again —she smiled—.
Agnetha: yes, our children are going to be contemporaries, I am happy.
Frida: I'm dying, we have to come and do all the shopping together.
Agnetha: We haven't talked to Stig yet but you pregnant and I pregnant don't think we can do much with ABBA.
Frida: I don't know what will happen either but it doesn't matter because it's good news.
At that time Frida sees that someone is approaching them and the first thing she thought "can't be" had to see Mona even in her moment of peace, she without saying anything sat at the same table and Agnetha was watching her waiting for her see what he would do but couldn't contain herself.
Agnetha: how cheeky are you, what are you doing here?
Mona: I didn't come to talk to you, I need to talk to you, Lyngstad.
Frida: —her face became sad again,— you and I have nothing to talk about.
Mona: since we share the same man I think we should talk about many things.
Frida: I don't share a man with anyone, if you talk about Benny I think you should know that he's not mine anymore.
Mona: I need you to help me.
Agnetha: but what happens to you? isn't it enough for you to have destroyed their lives?
Mona: Frida, can we talk alone, you and me? It's really important what I have to tell you. Let's go to the bathroom.
Frida thought before saying yes, Mona got up from the table waiting for Frida, Agnetha beckoned her not to leave but she got up ignoring her and followed Mona, she had to know what she had to tell her. Agnetha rolled her eyes because her friend ignored her and worried that they were together.
In the bathroom, Frida couldn't stop looking at Mona's belly, although it was much smaller than hers, it could be noticed, she couldn't believe that she also has a child with the one that hhas always been the love of her life.
Frida: I'm here, I'm listening and I hope you're quick.
Mona: I need you to help me, Benny keeps on rejecting our baby and it hurts a lot.
Frida: I don't understand, I can not help you —her tears began to fall when the knot in her throat broke—.
Mona: yes, you can, you are also a mother and you know him, you know how much it hurts us when they reject our children.
Frida: I'm sorry, I'm not in control of Benny and what happens between you two is not my business, I can't help you. After you get pregnant with my husband, why do you come to ask for help?
Mona: don't think I'm very happy to come to ask for help but I don't have any other way, I'm desperate and it hurts his rejection, it's not fair that he has got me pregnant and I have to watch over our baby by myself.
Mona started crying inconsolably, Frida didn't know what to do, although she was also to blame for having wallowed with Benny she knew what a mother suffered for her children and it broke her heart and she felt bad and guilty because this child grew up without the support from his dad.
Frida: Okay, I'll help you get Benny to recognize his baby.
Mona inside was smiling although on the outside she continued with her tragic face, Frida didn't even think what she had just said but had to fulfill her promise although she didn't know how. She felt that her life was a mess, she didn't know where she was going or where she was, she was just living to live, her soul wasn't as strong as she thought and she didn't know if she could overcome all that.
She left the bathroom and came back with Agnetha who saw in her eyes that she needed a big hug, they both hugged and remained that way for a while.
The next day, they were in the studios rehearsing and preparing everything for the Dick Cavett show, Agnetha and Frida were warming up the voices and rehearsing the songs while making sure the sound was good, Benny played the piano and Björn made sure that the technical part be ready In that they spent most of the day.
While they rested to go to prepare and start recording the show Frida was drinking water and Benny approached her to know how she was but she responded sharply as she had done the last months and when he was the half-turn she called him.
Benny: what happens?
Frida: we have to talk about something.
Benny: you will say.
Frida: have you thought what will you do with your baby that Mona is expecting?
Benny: I don't intend to do anything at all.
Frida: you know that is very irresponsible on by you?
Benny: it's not because I'm not the dad.
Frida: Stop lying, you've been doing it all this time, why don't you become an adult once and for all? This is serious, she could sue you if you don't fulfill your responsibilities.
Benny: do you think I'm immature?
Frida: Of course I think so. You should mature to stop hurting the people around you.
Benny: I feel chained, I can't take this anymore, I can't take it anymore that you continue to denigrate me and make me feel like I'm a piece of shit. I got tired, Anni-Frid Lyngstad.
Frida: You should also tire of embarrassing every woman who passes you by.
Benny: are you listening? You just said idiocy, I don't want to talk anymore.
Frida: even if you don't want to talk to me, in fact I don't want to but you must take care of your baby with Mona.
Everyone went to the dressing room to get ready and start recording, Frida had nothing more to do than be at home and mourn how she did it every day since she found out about Benny's infidelity.
When they left, they didn't even share glances, she knew that if she looked at him she would not resist and the pain would cover her heart, love had already lost its way. Agnetha and she held hands as support before starting and thanks to her Frida felt she could handle everything, having Agnetha gave her a lot of confidence that she wasn't wearing her cross by herself and could relax more.
The presentation had been one of the dumbest they had yet had the most wonderful, the way that ABBA could mix the feelings to do something spectacular was something of gods, in Knowing Me, Knowing You Frida tried several times to look at Benny but she evaded as she could, felt how her whole heart was tearing, she had never felt so much how at that moment the lyrics of the song.
She had given the best of her to Benny and now she felt like the most unfortunate in the whole world, he could not be sincere.
When at last all the interview and the concert ended, Frida sat down in the chair in her exhausted dressing room, felt that she couldn't do it anymore, her mind and body couldn't resist anymore, she stayed on her back for a while while she rested from all the hustle and bustle. Stig knocked on the door and Agnetha went to open it.
Stig: emergency meeting in half an hour in the office.
Agnetha: why? what happened?
Stig: we have things to talk about.
Frida: I'm sorry Stig, I can not... I'm tired.
Stig: I'm sorry, it's about you and that's why you should be there and it's not in dispute.
Frida rolled her eyes, Agnetha closed the door and both began to dress to be more comfortable. When they left Björn, Benny, Agnetha and Frida looked at each other confused because they had no idea why the meeting was urgent. Björn and Agnetha were already leaving and Frida stopped them ignoring Benny.
Frida: can I go with you? I left my car.
Björn smiled at her and took her hand, it was obvious that she already knew the answer and didn't even have to ask. Benny didn't stop feeling like a piece of nothing, he felt displaced and it killed him that Frida applied the law of ice with him. Seeing Frida and feeling her absent broke her heart.
When they arrived at the office Görel and Stig were already waiting for them in the meeting room, they took a seat and Frida crossed her arms while they waited to know what it was all about, Stig got up and closed the door.
Frida: the shorter you are, the better.
Stig: I will be... "Two women, one bathroom, one man and four babies?"
Frida swallowed, what did he mean? Where did he get that? Stig threw the newspaper on the table and the four read the title of that news.
Stig: do you want to explain that to me, Frida?
Frida started reading the newspaper and realized they were reporting everything she had talked with Mona, apparently there was a journalist in the bathroom and she didn't realize it and now they knew everything, they knew about Benny's deceit, the pregnancy of Mona and the divorce process.
Benny: Frida, were you with Mona?
Frida tears began to fall, wasn't even able to look up, apparently every time everything was more complicated and didn't know how she would handle that. She felt so small in that giant world full of things, while her tears fell Björn who was next to her tried to comfort her.
Frida: I didn't know there was a journalist there.
Benny: you know they are everywhere. Why did you have to talk about our things in public and with that woman? Now I am like the beast of everything, —shouted at her—.
Frida: —got up and yelled even more,— I'm sick of you, I'm sick of all this, the press, I'm fed up of ABBA. I don't want to know anything else about all this, you act like I was to blame for something that you caused. It's true that I shouldn't have listened to her when talking to her, but why are you complaining? —couldn't contain her tears,— Do you think that all this doesn't hurt? you said you loved me and the next day I found out that you were sleeping with someone else... I want to forget you, get you out of my heart, —she kept screaming.— I want you to disappear from my life forever, I'm tired of loving you because it hurts me a lot, I want to bury everything this, be strong. I just wanted you to be always honest with me and you failed me. You have made me the most unhappy person in recent months and now you want me to feel guilty?
Frida hit the table very hard with her hands.
Frida: what the hell did you see on her? answer me.
Benny was afraid to answer him because he saw the fury in her eyes. She took the pencil holders on the table and began throwing them.
Frida: Is she more than me? What did you see? What did you need in your home? —kept screaming and throwing things,— why did you have to look at her? Be sincere once in your life. Why did you get tired of me?
They all stared at Frida in astonishment, she was really upset and hurt and kept yelling at Benny, her voice rumbled all over the room, Görel tried to get up to calm her but Frida was very irritated and intense that was why it was impossible.
Agnetha: Frida, calm down, it's not good for the babies.
Benny ran his hands over his face, he didn't know what to do when he saw her like that and he knew that if he answered or spoke he would make everything worse.
Frida: that's the only thing you've achieved with me, all my contempt since you hurt me. I will fight against all this I feel for you, I swear to you. I won't allow you to keep throwing me in the trash, how you have done it, you think that you are the hardest hit but it does me much more damage than you. There is absolutely nothing left between you and me from now on.
Frida took her handbag and left the room as quickly as she could, slammed the door and everything around shuddered, she ran away and crying completely ignoring the fact that she was pregnant, she stayed in Polar's entrance crying disconsolate until finding a taxi to go home.
Everyone in the office was paralyzed, Benny didn't stop crying and he didn't know what to say or do, they still didn't assimilate what had happened and how shattered Frida was, they had never seen her explode like that.