(BLU)
Everything has gone to hell.
As Robin dragged me inside his room and slammed the door hard behind him, I kept thinking that this is somekind of a bad dream.
Did it really happen? The ugly scene on the hallway and that...whatever that was in the living room...
What should I call it? Robin showing everyone how powerful he and his name is...was that the right name for what happened?
I don't know anymore. All I know is that I have to pull my wrist out of Robin's hold or my hand will start to feel numb. I don't think blood can flow in my hand because of how tight Robin is holding me.
"Let me go!" I shook Robin's hand from my wrist and pulled myself free of him. "Are you insane?" I glared at him as I massage my wrist that he almost squeezed, it's red and I am sure it will bruise later. "Why did you do that?"
"What? What did I do?" Robin scowled at me like everything that happened was my fault.
"That!" I gestured to the close door. "That scene in the living room. With the tablet and the video and the money slapping. How could you do that?"
"Easily," Robin replied with a shrug like he is relaxed except he is not relax...he is mad. I can still see it in his eyes. Robin is still very much angry. "I did it ever so easily..."
"That was wrong," I said. "This is wrong. I should be out there and reassuring AnneMarie..." oh my bestfriend. She must be so shocked about what happened and how Robin threw them all out of the penthouse.
"I need to send AnneMarie off," I said before I moved towards the door of Robin's room.
But Robin's arm on my middle stopped me. "No. You will stay here with me. We will stay here. Devin will send them all off..."
"Or scare them..." I glared at Robin. "Why didn't I know that this whole place is secured with cameras? What is this...the Big Brother house? Cameras everywhere..."
"It's for my protection," Robin simple replied. "You know I have a condition..."
"You have a temper. A terrible one." I corrected him. I sighed tiredly. "Look, let me pass. I just want to see AnneMarie before she leave..."
"No." Robin said adamantly, he is starting to piss me off.
"What is wrong with you?" I asked him in frustration. "This is not right. They were your guests. That was your party. You should have accomodated them well..."
"And I did! But that bastard Tim ruined it. I hate this party! That party was a mistake..." Robin said.
"Yes," I nodded. "That party should have not happened. But it did. And it's because of your choices. Now, you should take responsibility. For this party and for your swimming team. What? You kicked Tim out of the team."
"He deserves it!" Robin's eyes flashed in annoyance.
"No! He deserved the punches but he doesn't deserve to be kicked out of the swim team and be slapped by money in front of other students of St.Anne. No one deserves that, Robin. That kind of humiliation..."
"He deserves it and more!" Robin shouted at me. "I should kill him. That bastard..."
"Ugh! Stop it! Stop being angry!" I am getting loud and angry. "He did nothing wrong to you!"
"He hurt you!" Robin scowled darkly at me. "He punched you, Blu! Or have you forgotten that?!"
"No." I took a deep breath to calm myself a bit. "My face is still hurting. Of course I still remember his punch. My point is, he wronged me...not you!"
"This is my home! He hurt you in my home! In your home! That bastard violated you in your own safe space! That bastard should be dead!" Robin's emotions are so high.
"Sure..." I nodded. "But not by your hands. He wronged me. Not you. You have no right to humiliate anyone like that just because you are richer than everyone living right now. Slapping Tim with money on his face. Pushing him out of the team, in front of your teammates and captain. Gabe was there! He's the one that should decide about Tim's place on your team. Not you..."
"My Uncle paid for the facilities we use in the pool and he sponsors our uniforms and provide the transpostation when we compete. He does it because of me. Because I am part of that team. Me! I own that swimming team!"
"You own money," I told Robin sadly. "Gabe is the captain of the swim team. You and Tim are part of it. In equal grounding. You just have more money."
"And I can see that it doesn't impress you..." Robin sneered in annoyance.
"I think no one in your party was impressed. After that display you did, they now either hate you or scared of you. This is how you lose friends, Robin. They are your teammates. Your friends. And you just showed them how easy it is for you to kick them out. How easy it is for you to throw them away. That's wrong..."
Robin stared at me, "I did it for you." He said.
"I didn't ask for it. I begged you out there to stop it. You just don't listen. You won't listen." I sighed. I am tired and just plain drain from what happened. "I think you need to be by yourself and think about that you just did. You can still fix this..."
"How? By calling Gabe and telling him that Tim is still on the team?" Robin asked in a mocking tone.
"For starters, yeah..." I nodded.
"No. I cannot abide that jerk. If I got in the same pool as that bastard, I will really drown him." Robin said with promise on his tone and eyes.
He is frustrating. I swear. "God you are impossible..." I turned away from him because I don't know how to argue with him anymore.
But Robin caught my elbow this time. "Where do you think you are going? I told you, no one is leaving this room. You will stay here with me!"
I tried to push his hand from my elbow but Robin didn't budge. I settled on glaring at him. "Why will I listen to you when you won't listen to me?" I pointed the tip of my nose upward. "I want to go out there and catch AnneMarie. And if you are thinking straight, I think you will want to go after Gabe and your swim team so you can talk about this again."
"No!" Robin uttered stubbornly. "We will stay here. You will stay here. I did it for you! I did it all for you!"
"I didn't ask for it!"
"Then you shouldn't have let yourself get punched!"
"I didn't ask to get punch as well!" Is he kidding me? What kind of sane person would want to get punch?! "I didn't ask for it. Tim was drunk. He and Ricky decided to come here in the Master's quarters to check your room..."
"Then you should have just let them!" Robin shouted angrily. "You should have get out of their way! It's just a room, Blu! You should have just let them do what they want!"
"But it's your room!" I cannot believe we are arguing about this. "It's your well lit room!"
Robin got quiet. He stared at me for moments as he thinks. "You didn't want them to enter my room." It's not a question. It's a realization.
I sighed. "If it's Mr.Akage's room or office, I would not get in their way. If they just decided to check the library or the theater room, I will even open the doors for them. But they picked your room," I bit my lower lip. I don't know why but I suddenly feel teary. "I don't want them to enter your room..."
"Why?" Robin asked, almost whispering.
"Because..." I gestured to him. "You and I...we are in this together. You and I. I..."
"You care," Robin said as he slowly let my elbow go. My arm fell to my side. "You think if they see my room, they will know about my condition...?"
"No...I don't know..." I look at his eyes. "You don't want them to know, right? It's your secret. Our secret. This family's secret. You have panic attacks. It's a private thing. And your room is a part of it. Your well lit room." I bit my lower lip again as I search my brain for the right words to say. Then I gave up. "Yeah...maybe I care. For you. I won't let them know your secret. I want to keep it safe..."
Silence reigned after that. Robin and I stood there, in the middle of his room, with that silence between us.
I don't know when it began. Me caring for Robin's welfare. Was it when he got that panic attack during the Love Ball? The first time I fully experienced and witness for myself the pain Robin is in when he has a panic attack.
Or maybe it was when I noticed that Robin is not really a bad guy. He is not a jerk. Not totally. He is not self absorbed or narcissistic as well. He is just...Robin. Robin who can be nice and caring to others.
I started caring for him. Seeing him, not as a pompous arrogant popular guy in our school but someone who needs people to take care of him, someone who is willing to teach me to swim, someone who will push me to go out there and experience the world.
Someone who can be my friend. Or even a brother since I am almost an adoptee of his Uncle.
Something like that. My opinion on Robin changes and my feelings for him changes as well. So yeah...sure I care for him. And his secrets.
"Say it again,"
"What?" I didn't realize at first that Robin has spoken. "You want me to say what again?"
"That part," Robin said while staring at me. He moved a little to get in front of me. I frowned, "What part? The whole thing? You want me to repeat the whole thing..." oh that will be difficult. I already said so many things.
"No, just the last part." Robin took a step forward to close the distance between us.
I frowned at him. "What last part? About your secret? Yeah...I said. I don't want Tim and Ricky to see your room because I don't them to know about your panic attacks..."
"Because...?" Robin stepped forward again. I wonder why he keeps on coming closer.
"Because what?" I sighed.
Robin smiled. I frowned again. "Why are you smiling?" It's so surprising because he was a raving mad lunatic awhile ago and now he is smiling.
"Because you care," Robin said. "You care for me..."
Oh that. I shrugged. "Well yeah, I think I care about you. We live together. We go to school together. Like you said, you and I are together in many things." I tilt my head up to give him a smile in return. "Fine! I am starting to think you are not bad. And I think I am starting to see you as a normal human being."
"That's good..." Robin nodded before he puts a hand on my cheek. I found that weird, but okay. "I care for you too, Blu. I got angry because you got hurt."
"I am fine," I winced as my cheeks got a little hot. "I was just caught by suprise. I think I need to exercise because my reflexes were slow. But if I was not surprised, I could have easily avoided that punch,"
"Hmm..." Robin's thumb grazed the part of my cheekbone that Tim punched. I sighed. "I am fine, Robin. And thank you...for running to save me. If you didn't do that horrible scene outside, that's the first thing I would have said to you. Thank you."
I am not stupid, I know that Robin came to my rescue. Yes, he got ugly in the living room with the video on the tablet, the money slapping and kicking his teammate out of the swim team but to me...Robin was a hero. He ran to save me from more punches.
"No one should hurt you. You don't deserve that," Robin said while he continued to hold my cheek.
"Sure," I nodded before chuckling. "I promise, next time I will move faster to avoid a fist coming to my face. Thank you for caring enough to run and save me."
"Yes, I care for you and your well being." Robin nodded.
I smiled. "And I care for you too." That's why I know Robin will regret this decision of his to kick his teammates out of the swim team. I don't think Robin is that vindictive.
"I like you, Blu." Robin said.
Oh...that's nice of him to like me. I think that's great that Robin likes me. We can be friends now or maybe even brothers.
"I like you too," I said back. Sincerely.
"Good," Robin smiled back at me before he leaned down and press his lips to mine.
WAIT! WHAT?!
..................
Robin is kissing me.
Again!
WHAT THE HELL?! How did we ended up like this...again?!
And like when Tim had cornered and punched me, I was slow to react. Robin had walked us backwards towards his bed and we fell there, him on top of me, before I got to react.
I pushed his shoulder so his face will separate from mine, "What are you doing?" I asked him with, I think, my eyes wide open.
Robin smiled softly at me. I felt electrocuted. Is he...being soft on me? Like soft and fluffy?! What?!
He caressed my cheek again. "It's okay. It's alright," Robin said before he kissed me again.
"I...uhmp..." I don't know what to do anymore. Robin has a hand on my head, keeping me steady while his lips are on mine and his tongue is licking my lips...
Oh my God...there is a tongue in the equation now! What in the...
Don't freak out Blu!
I raised my arms and hands in the air. My eyes open and I am staring straight at the bed's ceiling. Robin's body is pressing me on the mattress and he is half naked and I felt something hard in my middle.
Hard?! Something is hard! What?!
Oh no! Fuck this shit!
I am freaking out! I think I need to freak out! NOW!
I gather the remaining sane sense that I have. You know...those senses that are still working and are not in complete shock right now. I gathered them and they were enough for me to push Robin hard to get off me.
"Okay!" I shouted as I jumped off from lying on the bed to stand up and take some steps away from Robin. "What is happening?" I asked him.
Robin, who was obviously equally surprised, stared at me with wide eyed looks while sitting on the bed. "We are kissing. Well, we were kissing..."
"Yeah, I know. I was on that bed with you," I gestured at the bed. Then on his lap and I almost gasped when I noticed his swim shorts are bulging. Something inside it is making it...bulge.
Why? Oh...
"Why were you kissing me?" I asked Robin.
He frowned at me. "Because we like each other. Isn't that what happened?" He said in a matter of fact tone.
I was flabbergasted for a second. Then I moaned a little. "Oh my," I bit the second knuckle on my forefinger. "You...ahm...you think we...like each other?"
Robin's frown deepened. "You said you like me. You said you care."
"And I do!" I exclaimed that reassurance. "I do like you. As a person," I made that one clear. "You know I used to think your are a total douchebag but now...I am now aware that you are nice and normal and I like that. I like you...but not like like you..." I winced while explaining.
This is so damn hard. And awkward. Hard and awkward...those could be the title of my biography. Blu Tañada's Life Story: Hard and Awkward.
I sighed. "I like you Robin. As a person...maybe even as a friend or a brother." I winces again. "Sort of platonic. Nothing that should warrant some kissing..." I stopped talking because I am starting to babble.
Robin grew thoughtful. Then his face grew blank. "I see..."
I swallowed hard. "I think there's a misunderstanding. Something got lost in translation. Robin..."
"Yeah," Robin nodded but his face remained blank. Void of any emotion. He blinked but still, his eyes were flat.
"Are you...okay?" I worry if he is on the onslaught of a panic attack.
"Yeah," Robin said again. Then his blank stares focused on me. I almost jumped in fright with his stares. "I think I need to be alone..."
"Oh," I said lamely. "Should I call Mr.Devin or your Uncle?" I asked, trying to be helpful.
"No," Robin stood up. I took steps away when he did that. Robin walked towards me and I walked backwards to keep the distance between us. Until my back collided with something solid behind me.
A wall. I was backed against a wall. I started feeling some panic. "Robin, I..."
"I need to be alone, Blu." Robin reached out...to open the room's door, just a feet away from us. Then Robin put a hand on my shoulder and he gently pushed me out of his room.
I stood outside, feeling unsure. "Robin...are you sure..."
"Yeah," Robin said evenly before he closes the door on my face. My eyes widened. "Robin!" I pounded at his door. And turn it's knob. It's locked. "Robin you closed the door! It's tight shut! Robin!" I called his name louder.
"Master Blu!" Mr.Devin came beside me. I turned my panicking face on him. "Robin closed his door. He locked it. That's not right."
"Let me handle it," Mr.Devin produced a master key and pushed me away gently so he can open Robin's door. He slipped his head inside and sighed.
I watched as Devin pushed the door until it's almost closed. Opened ajar.
"He is fine, Master Blu. I suggest going to your room now," Mr.Devin said.
I gave him an unsure look. "But Robin..."
"Master Robin is tired. Go now," Mr.Devin gently ushered me away from Robin's slight opened door.
We got to the empty living room. "Where are the guests? Did you send them off well?" I asked Mr.Devin.
"Yes," Mr.Devin nodded. "They were grumbling because they are teenagers but all was accounted for and we send them off with their body parts intact and their things with them. Miss AnneMarie, your bestfriend, asked me to tell you to call her when it's convenient for you to call."
I look at the garden and saw people cleaning there. Mr.Devin sighed. "We will be done soon. We also packed the leftover food, most of them I will give to the cleaning crew. I will only leave enough food for you and Master Robin for tomorrow's lunch. You can reheat them in the microwave. Master Zane ad Master Gilbert will be home tomorrow afternoon, if their schedules won't change. Master Gilbert can take charge from there. For now...you can go to your room."
"And Robin?" I look over Mr.Devin's sides to the hallway of the Master's quarters.
"If Master Robin needs anything, I will help him." Mr.Devin said. "Goodnight, Master Blu." Mr.Akage's secretary bowed slightly to me.
I sighed before turning away to walk towards the Servant's quarters. Towards my room.
This day is sure eventful. So many things had happened and everything is now swirling in my head.
I think I am having a headache.
Oh my...
....................
(ROBIN)
Did I just got...rejected?