Today was the day we were leaving.
I told him how happy I was to see him walking and smiling.
And at this he just smiled wider and hugged me. "Hey, we finally get to go home together. It's going to be so much fun."
I noticed that his scent was slowly coming back to him, just like the life in his eyes.
I soon realized that I wasn't afraid of being alone anymore.
I wasn't afraid of the things in my past.
I wasn't scared what others were going to think of me.
Because the only person that mattered was soonyoung, and what he thought.
We went home with Jim that day, soonyoung and I holding onto each other's hands.
She had to go back to work almost immediately but soonyoung walked me back into the huge house.
I've been here before, yet memories continued to flood in my head endlessly.
We spent time together eating and changing into clothes that we missed wearing outside of the hospital.
After a while of settling and such, we found ourselves laying down next to each other on the bed, me in his comforting embrace.
"Hey soonyoung," I spoke catching his attention, as he rested his chin on the top of my head while I played with the fabric of his shirt.
"Do you remember when we met?" I spoke.
I heard him let out a breath as of in remembrance.
"Of course I do." He moved back slightly so he could view my face.
He smiled softly while as he looked at my eyes.
"I saw you when I was walking through the hallway. You looked past me the first time but your eyes went to my direction, and I remembered thinking how pretty they were."
He closed his eyes as he thought.
"The second time though, you noticed me. And when we saw each other that time I saw your face clearly. I didn't know why I had such a hard time looking away, but I knew I had to go.
I saw the look and expression on your face. You were upset and tired, and the first thing that came to my mind was how badly I wanted to change that, even for a person I didn't know.
The first time we talked the only thing I could think of was how nervous I felt, but I hid it."
He let out a 'pfft' at the memory he was thinking about.
"I knew I had feelings to you almost immediately, and saying now it's kind of embarrassing but I knew I saw you there for a reason.
And the more I spoke to you the more I realized I was falling in love with you, especially on the night we snuck out together."
I smiled at the sentence. "That night was something I never had experienced before." I admitted.
He laughed a little, "yeah especially when you got sicker afterwards. That was one of the biggest scares of my life. But it was that day I wanted to try to make every day better for you.
I wanted you to live happily and the best you could, and I wanted to help as much as I could.
I wanted you to want to live on and get excited to see the tomorrow and the next day.
That day made me realize that you were the most important thing in my life, and the most important person I'd ever have.
You made me feel love I never experienced before, and I didn't know how to express it."
He put his hand on my cheek as I stared at him.
"I love you more than words could explain.
And I will always love you like this jihoon, and you are the only person I will ever love.
I promise I'll be someone who you can love back.."
He trailed off. ".. I wanted to get you something but I didn't expect to get worse by the time I wanted to go get it.."
He looked back into my eyes, and wiped away the tears I didn't even know were flowing out.
"But I want to spend the rest of my life with you jihoon. I want to be the first see you when you wake up, and last you see when you go to sleep.
I want to take you out and spoil you, and love you how you deserve to be loved.
I want to move somewhere with you and buy a house, and experience beautiful things with you.
You are my home jihoon."
I couldn't help or hold back anymore.
I broke into a smile while tears flooded my vision as I hugged him tightly. He had gotten emotional too.
"I w-want to spend the rest of my life with you too soonyoung." I cried happy tears into his shirt.
We shared our words together in the emotional embrace.
"I love you."
~~~
Kwon soonyoung was someone who only knew how to give.
He only wanted people to smile.
He saw the best in things, he saw the best in me.
He was someone who can make gold out of thin air.
All the days I spent with him felt unreal.
They felt animated.
Yet I wouldn't trade them for anything.
Soonyoung took tears and dried them, took love and expanded it.
He saved me.
He would cure anyone with his touch, his hands leaving traces of his affection and love. The hands I would always want to hold so tightly.
He was someone you would be lucky to see, or have in your life.
Without him, nothing would fill the hole people get in their hearts.
He filled my heart.
His blonde hair and golden brown eyes, his soft skin and his sunshine smile.
His serious looks and his affectionate ones,
His crying face and the look he had while laughing,
Everything was so beautiful.
Life became beautiful because of him.
Life became worth living because of him.
He made life in a hospital seem like heaven compared to life before I had met him.
We stayed there for what felt like forever, loving each other.
Life was delicate yet so beautiful and valuable when kwon soonyoung walked into it.
Beautiful, like the flowers he would leave for me at the desk.
The flowers I loved to look at.
~FIN~