Another few weeks had gone by, Thanksgiving included. Billy and I have been closer than we've ever been before. Life is still hectic given what Billy does for a living but I now somehow manage to sleep without waking up worried if today's going to be the day that I get the call that Billy's been killed or something horrible along those lines. I've been spending a lot of time with Billy, going with him to do his sales - which usually I didn't like doing but... he always got me burger king or some kind of fast food first so... my pregnant ass ain't complaining.
My stomach had finally started to show the bump everyone's been patiently waiting for. Christy has been a few months sober which was surprising considering she went out on Halloween with Megan but apparently she didn't do drugs or drink so I guess that's good.
Overall, things seem to be going okay especially after everything that happened this summer/this fall. Well, all except this fucking detective who hounded me for questions and whenever she sees me, she makes sure to repeat herself telling me that if I'm ever in trouble or see anything going on, to call her. She apparently has known Billy since he was a kid and though he's been in trouble - a lot - she's always had a soft spot for him/kept an eye on him. Her name is Jessica Wallis, Detective Jessica Wallis.
I'm starting to get stressed, she knows something's up... she knows something went down with Billy's gang and Charlie's gang. This woman is too smart, she's on to us and whether it's classified as 'betrayal' to Billy and his boys, I'm gonna keep on this bitch's good side. String her along, keep her updated on little shit and hopefully don't get my head blown off in the process or behind bars.
Fuck. My. Life.
"Look, what I'm trying to say is... I know for a fact that these two deaths are coincidental." Wallis said pausing to take a sip of her coffee.
"What does this have to do with me?" I sighed, staring at the clock and bouncing my knee up and down.
"You look like you're nervous."
"I am." I admitted, sighing, "I'm suppose to be grocery shopping not hanging out with my new detective buddy.
"Believe me when I say, I know how the boys work."
"Oh yeah?"
"Billy looked after one of mine, I'll look after one of his: YOU." Wallis leaned forward and pointed in my face.
"Excuse me?" I questioned, confuised at what she had just said.
"You don't know?" Jessica giggled in disbelief, shaking her head and standing back up straight. "I'm a lot closer to home than you think, baby girl."
"Bodie...?" I guessed, feeling like a piece of shit due to my assumption going off of the fact that both Bodie and Jessica were black.
"Bingo." Wallis confirmed, "Baby brother. Just like Joey was Billy's baby brother."
"How-"
"I got out. Made something of myself." Jessica cut me off, turning and looking at me, "Making the right choices instead of climbing into bed with the wrong ones."
"When's your due date?" She asked, changing the subject at notice that I was staring down at my feet in shame.
"April 19th." I replied softly.
"It's not just you that you have to watch out for now." Wallis sighed sitting down in front of me, "If Billy started a war... God help you."
"He didn't die Amber." She admitted, finally getting to the point.
"What? Who? I don't know what you'r-"
"Cut the shit and listen. I'm telling you this as a sister of the gang not a Detective. Charlie did not die. My team didn't find any trace of Billy or the boys... but I know for a fact that they did this. Charlie is alive and out. I don't know where and I don't know what he's doing but I know he's alive and he will be coming after Billy, Bodie and the boys." Detective Wallis explained.
She frowned and handed me a gold iphone that I recognized, in fact I know who it belonged to, "...Is it Charlie's or Billy's?"
"Billy's!" I exclaimed, becoming humiliated.
"You're lucky I found this and my team didn't. A whole phone of texts Charlie sent to and received from you." She pursed her lips, "That alone is enough motive, no?"
"Why are you doing this? You play good cop/bad cop for fun?" I hissed, pressing my tongue to the inside of my cheek.
"I'll put my job before I put my family and the kids I grew up with first." She replied sternly, "I am trying to protect you Amber. Believe it or not I care.... about you and all of them. But I love my career too. If you hear anything about Charlie or get any kind of threats, you call me. Okay?"
"I'm going to be late for my doctor's appointment." I mumbled, ignoring her.
"Billy doesn't need to be put away just before his kid is born. That'll happen if he goes after Charlie and succeeds. So I suggest you do as I say." She added, handing me a business card. "Be safe Amber, he'll be coming after you first."
I stood up and nodded slowly, grabbing my purse and turning to leave her office. I wanted to punch a hole through the wall, I wanted to scream, run away - escape all of this bullshit. But instead I have to grab life by the balls and deal with it. Everyone told me I wasn't cut out for this life, so far I've proven them incorrect. I wanted this life, I knew what the sacrifices would be.
"You're getting into a whole new world now.... I hope you can handle it." Jessica Wallis called out from behind me.
I smirked and turned my head to stare at her from over my shoulder, "I guess we'll see."
Image
"I have something to tell you privately after we get out of here." I said to Christy, who was sitting down next to Megan watching the ultrasound screen.
"You can say it now while the ultrasound tech is out of the room, I don't care." Megan shrugged, staring at me oddly.
"I can't...tell... you..." I replied awkwardly.
"Why?" Megan asked, looking slightly hurt.
"Meg, trust me... if I could, I would. I can't have this getting back to Billy." I tried to explain.
Megan scoffed and looked at Christy before turning her attention back to me, "You think I'm gonna go and run my mouth to Jack about whatever it is you're hiding? I know how this shit works. I was smart enough to figure out that Jack was still working for Billy, I'll be smart enough to figure out whatever it is you have to say."
"This is different." I promised.
Megan laughed, "Not too long ago it was you in my position. Don't act like you're high and mighty just because you're on Billy's dick."
"Shut the fuck up, now." Christy barked.
Megan sighed, "I'm sorry... Just, come on Amber... you know how this is. You both tend to forget that I'm one of the boys's women too. I'm in this fucked up life just as much, if not more than Christy, as you two."
"Charlie's alive." I announced, staring up at the ceiling.
"What?!" Both of them exclaimed.
"You have got to be fucking kidding me!" Christy exclaimed, throwing her hands up and leaning her head back against the wall.
"How?! Jack said Billy shot his point blank in the chest. There's no-"
"Obviously wasn't deep enough to hit an artery." I cut Megan off.
"What do we do?" Megan asked.
"We?" Christy cocked an eyebrow up.
"Hell yeah, 'we'. Who else?" Megan replied eagerly.
"I have to tell Billy... I need to know that this fucker isn't going to come after me or the baby." I replied, definitely hesitant to do so.
"You were talking to fucking Jessica Wallis, weren't you?" Christy shook her head. "This is exactly what that fucking bitch wants. To get us to retaliate so she can finally put Bodie and everyone behind bars. Give your head a fucking shake."
"She's a fucking Detective you stunned bitch. I couldn't turn her down when she fucking cornered me at the grocery store with two officers behind her. I had to go." I spat, sitting up, not caring that I still had gel all over my stomach.
"Hey! Enough, you two!" Megan cut in.
"Point is, he's alive."
"So what do we do?" Christy asked, clicking her jaw to the side.
"If Billy finds out and goes after him... he's gonna go to jail. I can't tell him..." I reminded myself out-loud. "Wallis said she doesn't know where Charlie is... no one does... no one is alive who would know."
"So we track him down." Megan shrugged, "Hire someone... there's got to be-"
"No need to get stupid now. I have someone who would know where he might be." Christy stated coolly.
"Who?" Megan and I both asked at the same time.
"The guy who sold to me the first time, he was working for B-street. Then Zack and Syn started doing some of the sales and I never saw him again... But I know where to find him." Christy answered.
"Where?"
"It's a run down club, rough looking people, mean - rough - people go there. He has a few hood rats from the highschool that sell blow and weed for him. He ain't shit." Christy replied. "We can go there tonight."
"Oh yeah, fucking great idea. Let me just take my pregnant ass in there without anything to protect myself with and start questioning a fucking B-street member." I snarled in disgust.
"We won't be unprotected." Christy declared.
"I have someone who can get me guns."
"Are you fucking nuts?!" I spat, laying back down and covering my face with my hands.
"You wanna get a gun pointed at the back of your head again? Me neither. Trust me, we wont need them... but it's nice to have them." Christy assured me.
"Who the hell do you know is gonna loan you three guns?!" Megan asked wide eyed.
"Not loan, sell." Christy corrected. "Unregistered, no serial numbers.... Bones."
"Are you back on drugs?!" I exclaimed, rising up like Dracula. "Tell me you snorted an eight ball of coke before coming here and that you're not actually this stupid!"
"How the fuck are we gonna get guns from Billy's dad?! Billy would find out in a heart beat and lose his shit!" Megan exclaimed.
"You think Bones is gonna turn down cold hard cash?" Christy rolled her eyes. "Three guns... I have enough, trust me."
"How'd you get the money?" I asked suspiciously, almost considering her idea.
"I work..."
"At the Four Roses. No way tips are that good or I would have stayed." I grumbled.
Christy sighed, "I'm a cam girl on my spare time."
Megan and I both closed our eyes and sighed agitated sighs.
"What... the fuck..." Megan said slowly.
"Yeah, moneys great. Masturbate on webcam, get like $200 bucks every hour. It's great. Pays to be beautiful." Christy explained with a shrug.
"Pays to have fake tits." Megan muttered under her breath.
Christy smirked, "Precisely."
"Even if we were to go through Bones - which is a stupid idea by the way - how are we gonna do that without Billy or the guys seeing us and or finding out?" I asked.
"Simple really. I get Jack to text me when they've all left Bones's shop or when they wont be there." Megan replied.
"Not so simple, Meg. Jack will know something's up." I corrected.
"I have someone who knows all of that and won't say a damn thing to Billy or anyone for that matter." Christy assured us both.
"Dear God, who?" Megan asked for me.
"Jesus Christ, are you a detective? just trust me." Christy retorted.
Before anymore could be said between the three of us, there was two loud knocks from outside the door before the door slowly opened and the ultrasound technician peered her head in and smiled at me. Christy looked tense, staring around the room while Megan looked overly excited.
"Sorry that took so long, are you ready to begin?" The tech asked, sitting down on her spinny stool in front of the screen.
I was skeptical about this plan of Christy's enough already, but now that Bones is thrown into the situation, I'm starting to feel like I'm walking on thin ice. I couldn't risk letting Christy go alone, so no matter how much I dwell on the idea, I have to go with her to Bones's shop whether I like it or not. I just hope whoever Christy 'has' can keep an eye out for Billy and his boys. Not to mention, I hope we have enough money to bribe Bones to keep from blowing our cover.
All I want is to have a semi normal life with my gang lord boyfriend and raise our child to grow up and be semi normal. But then again, I also want to wait up every day and be flawless and never have to watch what I eat again or wake up with 10 million in my bank account so... I guess I better roll with the big dogs or sit at home on the porch with the pups.
I'd much rather sit at home on the porch with the pups...
"I'm just going to add some more gel. This is going to be cold." The tech laughed faintly as she applied for blue goop on my lower abdomen and my whole stomach.
Megan and Christy both leaned forward in their seats as the tech started to do her thing. I swallowed hard and turned my head to look at the screen.
"Ah, there baby is." The tech smiled in awe.
"Oh my God!" Christy and Megan squealed, pouting their lips.
Even though everything has been shit lately - minus the fact that Billy and I are doing really good again - and I've become even more stressed out than I usually am, my whole world seemed to be lifted up out of the darkness and into the light. That precious little baby on the screen with his or her hand curled up by it's face is my baby, my child. Half me and half the person I love unconditionally. The child that's not even out in the world yet but somehow such a huge impact on my life.
Right at this moment, I vowed to always protect my child regardless of the lengths I may have to take to do so. I vow to be the loving, caring and nurturing mother that I never got to grow up with. This small little baby on this screen is going to be my reason for breathing, my reason to stand up and speak louder than usual, to be the strong woman I need to be - especially in a life like the one I now live. I would kill for this child, I would climb the highest mountain for this child, I would go through hell and back for this child. My child.
"Do you wanna know the sex of baby?" The tech asked with a grin.
I blinked away a few tears and shook my head, "No, I want the surprise."
"Can we get the pictures?!" Megan asked anxiously.
"Of course, Amber will be getting them when we're all done." She replied flashing a warm smile.
"We're gonna get those photo copied, I want one!" Megan exclaimed.
"Me too! That's my niece or nephew." Christy chimed in. "I'm gonna get going, gonna get a hold of the person we were talking about earlier... I'll meet you guys back at mine and Meg's place around dinner time."
I sighed, "Alright, thanks for coming Chris."
Christy placed her arm across my chest and gripped my left shoulder in attempt to give me a hug while I was laying down, "No worries. I'll see you tonight, k?"
With that, Christy left the room. Megan and I went back to staring at my bundle of joy on the screen.
"Oh my God, beeb's is so freakin' cute!" Megan squealed. "I can't believe how fast this is going."
"Right? Seems like it was summer only yesterday." The tech tried to make conversation. "I can't believe it's already the end of November."
"I'm stoked, Christmas is the best time of year." Megan engaged in conversation.
"Not to mention we're suppose to have light snow next week. Perfect timing."
"Really? Snow? Already? Damn Boston and it's unpredictable weather." Megan frowned.
I haven't seen snow in what felt like forever. I almost miss Michigan's cold, snowy winters. But given the fact I can wear a sweater and see grass around this time of year, I'm down with Boston's weather. I miss Michigan though... I miss my siblings... I even miss my parents sometimes and wish things were different.
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"I'm surprised you're awake." Christy said as she climbed into the passenger seat of Heco's car.
"Been cookin' more of our shit at the office today." Heco replied tilting his head to the side and scratching his neck.
"I need a favour." Christy turned and said.
"Whatcha need?" Heco asked coolly.
"I need guns."
Heco started to laugh, "For what? Saturday night special?"
"For a pest." Christy replied with a wink.
"You can use mine." Heco offered.
"No, I know where to get guns... I just, need you to basically make sure Billy or any of the others don't go to Bones's shop this evening." Christy explained.
"Damn..." Heco shook his head and leaned back in his seat, "They're all at the office then half of us are going to sell tonight while the others are goin' to The Four Roses."
"So...?"
"So you'll be good to go... just shit... get what you need and get out of there fast." Heco sighed. "What's this even about? You were Joey's old lady.. we got your back."
"Can you keep a secret?" Christy asked, pulling out a pack of cigarettes from her purse.
"You of all people know I can keep a fuckin' secret." Heco retorted, watching as Christy placed a cigarette between her lips and held up the flame from her lighter to the end of her cigarette.
"Someone may be after Amber." Christy admitted.
"You gotta be fuckin' kidding me. I gotta tell Billy, you know I gotta tell Billy." Heco exclaimed.
"You can't!" Christy exclaimed, exhaling smoke from her mouth.
"You can't just fuckin' show up at Bones's shop asking to buy guns! Bones hates you and Amber... he hates anyone who could potentially make his sons turn on him-" Heco ranted.
Christy rolled her eyes and exhaled another cloud of smoke, "Well. Joe's dead, isn't he?"
"I'm sorry..." Heco sighed running a hand over his shaved head. "Bones just-"
"Bones loves money. He loves getting money. He's not going to care if it's from me or Elvis for fucks sake. He'll sell to me." Christy assured Heco.
Heco nodded slightly in agreement, "True but what if he asks?"
"Like you said, he could care less about his sons, he especially does not give a fuck about Amber or I. He won't ask anything."
"Even then... I can't keep this a secret from Billy." Heco groaned.
"Why not?" Christy asked, rolling down her window and throwing her cigarette butt out before turning to face Heco, "You managed to keep us a secret."
Heco sighed loudly, "You drive me crazy."
Christy leaned over and pressed her lips against Heco's, kissing him roughly before nibbling on his bottom lip slightly, "But I'm right."
Heco pulled away slightly and stared into Christy's eyes, "I already betrayed Joey by fucking you for a month before he died... I can't betray Billy by not telling him and letting something happen to Amber."
"Nothing will happen to Amber, trust me." Christy reassured him, giving him a peck on the lips. "Besides, you're good at keeping secrets from Billy and everyone else. What's one more?"
Heco laughed in disbelief, "Fucking Joe's girl behind his back is a lot different than not telling Billy when his pregnant girl is in danger."
"You didn't stop even after Joe was killed... How do you think that'll set with Billy?" Christy replied in a cocky tone, knowing damn well she had Heco by the balls.
"I sure hope you're right about Amber being okay... or Billy will not only kill me, he'll fuckin' kill you too." Heco reminded her.
Christy sighed and rolled her, "Trust me. Now can we go back to your place?"
Heco smirked slyly and put the car in reverse to pull out of the parking lot of the hospital, "Fuck yeah."