A/N
I can't tell you how weird it is to see 500k reads on my story. I never expected to reach 1,000. Whoah. Why you guys decided to read my lame stories is beyond me but I'm grateful for all of you.
Oh and btw this story is LOOSELY based off of my extra wifey charlieheatons
Shawn's POV
I didn't even know she was back in town until I saw a post on Instagram.
You wouldn't even have noticed it at first. It looked like a photo from Australia with her new friends there. But the location said "Pickering, Canada". She was back in Toronto.
I didn't know what to think about it.
I shouldn't even be thinking about it, but as I sat in a crimson leather booth at a restaurant by my home, all I could think about was her. I don't even remember when the last time I had an actual conversation with her was. We drifted apart after she moved. She sort of drifted apart from everyone. It was like no one here existed to her. The only way I knew she existed herself was through social media. Matthew texted me before I could jumble any thoughts about her sudden appearance.
From The Only Espinosa
Did you see who is back in your hometown ;) your little crushhhhh
From Shawn
I haven't had a crush on her in years. Since Magcon!
From The Only Espinosa
Yeah okay. You are one of the first to like her posts.
From Shawn
How do you know that?
From The Only Espinosa
I didn't. Wild guess.
From Shawn
I wait until she gets at least 100 likes.
From The Only Espinosa
So you still have a crush on her.
From Shawn
I haven't talked to her in years. And I have a completely different life now. So no. I don't. And what if this was just some joke to begin with?
From The Only Espinosa
It could. But if it isn't....
From Shawn
Then why would I care?
From The Only Espinosa
I'm just saying. You'll are back in Hockeyland. She is in Hockeyland. You guys could go be super nice to strangers, listen to Justin Beiber and eat "bacon" together.
From Shawn
That's the most stereotypical, offensive thing you have said in a while Matt.
From The Only Espinosa
What? You not liking JB is your problam not mine!!
From Shawn
Problem**
From The Only Espinosa
Oh you are correcting me now too? It's like that bossy, know it all girl never left your life.
From Shawn
Again, rude. Are you on your period?
From The Only Espinosa
Assuming my mood automatically means I'm at that time of the month... Now who is being rude?
From Shawn
Whatever. I'm not going to do anything so.
From The Only Espinosa
You are such a Grinch to love.
From Shawn
Not love. Not anything.
From The Only Espinosa
Grinch.
From Shawn
Completely Reasonable Male**
From The Only Espinosa
Why live reasonably?
From Shawn
We are done.
I was stressed out. Matt wasn't the only one to text me. But I ignored everyone after that. I just needed to clear my head. I didn't know why it bothered me so much that she didn't tell me she was coming back. When people leave, they always say they will keep in touch.
They never do.
We didn't. Which I expected. It still hurt. Because I tried to. But she didn't.
But I can't blame her. She wanted to go off, to somewhere new, anywhere but here.
Now she is back.
"Shawn!" Aaliyah yelled, snapping her fingers in my face.
"What?!" I exclaimed. Then I realized the family was starting at me, that I was at the dinner table, and that I had been daydreaming for who knows how long.
"Are you okay Shawn?" My mother asked concerned. I nodded frantically.
"Yeah. I'm good I'm good. This casserole is delicious!" They luckily looked away after that.
"Are the boys coming over tonight?" Aaliyah asked. Tonight we were having everyone over; this means all of my friends, Aaliyah's friends that she actually likes at the time and my parents few friends. We ordered a bunch of pizza, turned on whatever sports were on the TV and had poker tournaments in the kitchen.
"You bet. And if we do play the Wii and you lose you can't hit them got it?" She laughed at that and rolled her eyes.
"Stop it you two. Go wash the dishes now when I start to get everything set up now," mom shooed us into the kitchen with the dishes. After a couple snoozing minutes of slience, Aaliyah was back at it.
"What were you thinking about all dinner eh?" She nudged me with her shoulder.
"None of your business," I countered.
"Defensive? Is a girl coming over tonight?!" Aaliyah jumped.
"Other than James' girlfriend, no," I chuckled.
"Then what do you got your panties in a twist about?"
I ignored her.
"Shawnnnnn," she begged.
"I just got a lot going on. You know work doesn't quit when I come home right?" She pursed her lips.
"Where is my song huh? I'm the coolest person in your life. Instead of writing about those lame girls, you should make a whole album as an ode to me!"
"I'll remember that weirdo," I agreed.
Soon there were people yelling, laughing, and running through the household. I was sitting in the living room with my friends, watching a hockey game on the TV and watching James and Eric argue over who would last longer eating ghost peppers.
Then the door bell rang. I waited for Aaliyah to get it but she claimed I was closer. So I got up to answer the door.
When I opened up the door, a pizza delivery girl stood, shy and hesitant. She was a few years younger than me, and looked like she for sure didn't know what she was actually doing. I smiled.
"
Hi, let me grab my wallet, one sec," I said and quickly grabbed my wallet off the table and ran back to her. She was staring at her worn down shoes, tapping her foot against the cement. She glanced up at me and smiled. She handed me the pizza box which I set on the coffee table.
"Thank you," she stammered as I handed her the money when I got back. "Here, I'll grab your change," she went to start digging through her bag.
"Oh no, keep the change," I insisted. She chuckled.
"Oh okay. Thank you so much," she stumbled over her words. I grinned.
"Have a good night miss," I called out as she started to rush away. She turned and did a quick wave before hurrying into her beat up car.
I went to walk back inside, I heard a car door slam. When I glanced, I froze.
She stood at the end of my sidewalk, staring at me with a slight grin, like she was mocking me.
"Was that your little girlfriend?" She asked, that dumb grin only getting bigger.
"No. What are you doing here?" I finally asked, slightly shutting the front door.
"Aw, she was kinda cute. In the adorable 'I wanna squish your little cheeks' way," she said and then laughed. She strolled up the sidewalk, glancing around the yard as she approached my house. She grew a couple inches, and she looked a lot older. She looked a lot different in person than I had seen in pictures, more beautiful.
Once she got up to me, her grin slowly diminished, her confidence flickered before she smiled again.
"I came here for Kenny."
"Kenny? You mean Kendra? Since when did you even know James' new girlfriend?" I asked, getting slightly upset.
"I'm staying with her and she forgot to give me her spare key," she explained, then squeezed right past me into my house.
"Wait-" I started, but she was already gone before I could catch her. When I finally found her, she was in the kitchen. Aaliyah's arms were wrapped around her waist, swaying slightly as she squeezed as tight as she could.
"I've missed you too, Li," she said before Aaliyah broke up the hug. Aaliyah was already asking a bunch of questions.
The rest of my family was raining complements on her. Asking how her family was, what life in the warm is like, those dumb small talk questions. My friends were all standing next to me now.
"You didn't tell me she was staying with you," I glared at James and Kendra.
"Wait what?" James glanced at Kendra. Kendra blushed.
"She told me to keep a secret."
"How do you even know her?" Eric asked.
"I saw that she was in some of y'alls old pictures so I looked her up and we started talking. And she didn't have a place to go."
"She has a family she could stay with. She fucking grew up here," I shook my head and stormed to the bathroom before anyone could talk to me, not that they would ever look away from her.
What is wrong with you? Chill out.
I stared at myself in the sleek mirror. Taking deep breaths.
When I finally gained enough courage, and calmed down enough, I walked out. She wasn't there. I walked to my parents.
"Where is she?" I asked quickly.
"Oh she just walked out! Isn't this exciting Shawn! She came to visit! It's been so lo-" my mom started to ramble.
"What the hell," I murmured and ran out the door. She was starting to get into her car. I ran down the grass.
"What the hell?" I asked myself as I approached.
"What the hell!" I yelled as anger left me in a burst as I reached her car. She knew I was there. But she didn't dare look at me.
All she did was sigh.
"You seriously came back, came to my house, said hello to my whole family and our- no my friends except Kendra and they decided to skip out?" I asked, practically screaming as the air left my lungs.
"Get in the car," she said quietly.
"No you do not get to do that now you don't get to l-"
"Get in the damn car Shawn!" She exclaimed, glaring at me with watery eyes.
I got in.
And I regretted ever leaving my house.
It was painfully silent except for the occasional deep exhale.
We finally pulled up to our old school parking lot.
"Why are we here?" I asked.
"Just shut up okay?" She shut me down. I bit my lip as she shook her head. "Damnit," she cursed as she wiped her eyes.
"This is one of the only places I feel safe Shawn that's why," she finally said.
"Y/N-"
"Please don't say my name okay? Please don't," she pled as she continued to brush the tears away.
I decided to keep to myself. I stared at the old building until she spoke again.
"I couldn't stay with my family," she said with some strength back in her voice.
"Why?" I asked softly.
"They hate me. Have ever since I moved away. Told me I didn't have a home to come back to. Of course they have been texting me constantly since they figured out I am back, asking when I would come over, apologizing for everything. But I can't go there. Kendra seems nice. And she is the only person I wanted to see while I was here."
That hurt. I gulped.
"Why are you here then?" I asked.
"My great uncle died or something. I don't even remember him but his will said I was to take this giant memorial thing and they wouldn't ship it. So I had to drive all the way here. I didn't even know the guy died."
"How did you find out?"
She chuckled darkly.
"The funeral home emailed me," she explained.
"Why didn't you ask me? You could've stayed with me. We have known each other for years and you'd really choose to stay with Kendra over me? Not even that, you didn't even tell me but you told Kendra? You obviously weren't keeping it that big of a secret if you were totally okay to put your location as here on Instagram. So what is the big ole game Y/N, huh? You still like to play the same games you used to?" I didn't mean or want to be selfish. All I wanted to do was hug her, talk to her, be with her. But I couldn't help how betrayed I felt. I was greedy over something I didn't have anymore, I wanted her back.
And I didn't realize it until she came back. But not for me. Why didn't she come back for me?
At first she didn't reply, at first she just played with her fingers, refusing to move her eyes away from her hands.
The orange glow of the street lamp behind her made her look like a silhouette, all I could see was her shadowed form.
"I don't know Shawn. I was scared to face you again," she admitted, wearing the guilt on her face, it almost tearing her apart.
"You mean because the way you left me?"
"It wasn't that bad," she argued.
"You pretty much left me at the fucking alter Y/N."
She scoffed. "Overdramatic. We would've never gotten married."
"You never told me you were leaving until we were walking back from that dumb café and your car was full of your boxes," I countered. "All you said was; "I am leaving. I don't know how long I'll be gone. But it will be a long time. I'm sorry. Keep in touch?". After everything?"
I made her feel even worse. But my point wasn't to make her better about what she did, so why was I feeling guilty myself. I was expecting her to apologize. To tell me that she missed me, that she regretted ignoring me. I wanted her to tell me she wanted me back.
"Look. We were young Shawn, you were going to get your heart broken sometime."
She didn't say any of those things.
"Yeah. You sure know how to do that," I muttered as I opened the door.
"Where are you going?" She asked.
"Home." I started walking towards to the street.
"Now who is leaving?" She grinned as she leaned against the car. I turned.
"No you don't get to do that." I pointed at her, losing my cool. She walked slowly up to me, smiling. I was so close to screaming at her, my fists were clenched at my side. I was going to lose it. I was going explode. Then she reached me.
"I can do whatever I want," she whispered, then kissed me.
And I lost it. I lost any anger I had. My hands fell to her waist. I lost any common sense telling me to back away. I got lost in her.
"I am sorry Shawn. I am not going anywhere," she mumbled against my lips.
"What about your life over there?" I asked.
"I moved to run away from what I was scared of. I'm not running away anymore Shawn. This is my home. You are my home."
A/N
Did you like it? Tell me in the comments! Thank you again for being so kind to me and reading my little rambles. It is truly amazing. Till next time, goodbye.