(A/N I recommend listening to soft/sad/instrumental music for this chapter,, also long chapter;)
In the month I've known Soonyoung I've learned whenever he makes a promise, he never breaks it.
"I want to go out." I said to him after he told me that once I got better he'd take me out to draw with him.
He smiled sweetly. "We will."
"No, I don't want to wait." I told him and he looked at me.
"What do you mean..?"
"I want to leave. I want to go out and see what it's like again. I want to go with you," after I explained his smile dropped a bit.
"You can't go now, you can't even walk." He frowned.
"We can figure something out." I said simply. "Won't it be fun?"
"Not if you're sick."
"Please." I looked at him.
"This is the only thing I want.. just for a little. I don't care where we go. I want to spend time with you and do something fun." My voice drew out slightly.
He looked like he wanted to. He did, but his face held a mixture of emotions.
"We can't." He soon said after a while.
I felt frustrated. "Soonyoung," I grabbed onto his hand tightly and pulled it towards me, making him pull his chair closer.
I put his hand on my cheek and wrapped my hands around his. "Please? Just this once, I don't know if I'll have a chance like this again."
He stared at me yet didn't move his hand away. "h-how do you feel now?"
"I'm okay." I assure.
I felt hopeful once I felt him curl his fingers with the tips of my hair as he pulled a thoughtful face.
He finally spoke again, "Okay."
I smiled widely and jumped up a bit. "Really? So, we're really sneaking out together?"
He nodded again, "Yes, we're crazy enough to even think of something like this."
I was so happy.
~~~
It was 2 AM when I heard two knocks on my door then someone enter.
I was asleep just before I noticed someone was knocking, so I sat up moments later to see Soonyoung's frame.
"Wake up." He whispered and poked my face.
I rubbed the sleep from my eyes because I couldn't really see anything that well.
"Look what I did," His voice was gentle but was laced with happiness.
I looked to where he wanted my attention to be adverted to, and saw a wheelchair.
"My IV's attacked onto it so I can be with you." A pole was attached to the wheelchair where his IV was hooked.
There was another empty one on the other side.
"I can hook yours up too!"
I felt happiness flood through my body and sat up, and crossed my legs. "That's so cool!"
He pushed the wheelchair to the other side of my bed and looked at what I was hooked up to.
He stopped and looked at everything. "I'm not sure how well this can work.." he said and examined my arms.
"I only really need the one with my treatment and IV like you.. I don't need anything else."
I honestly didn't know if I was right though.
He looked at me with a questionable look. "Are you sure?"
I nodded. "Yes I heard them say."
It was easy for me to take off the "unnecessary" things.
He then took off the IV from where it was and hooked it to the hook on the chair.
It didn't hurt at all.
But then was the harder part- moving me onto the wheelchair. I got nervous and he saw, but he made me feel better.
"I'm going to help you, alright?" He said softly and nodded.
"Okay.. please be gentle I don't want to fall."
"Only with you." He replied and went to my side.
He held my hand and wrapped his arm under me, supporting me.
My foot touched the floor wearily and soon I made soft steps, hugging his side for help.
He easily moved me to the wheelchair to which I smiled sheepishly.
"It worked." I whispered and looked up at him with a huge smile.
He smiled back and giggled. "You ready?" He urged and I nodded happily.
From where he was standing he draped something over me and it was a blue fuzzy blanket. "It's a little cold so bundle up." He winked.
I felt head rise to my face a little. I was already warming up.
"Okay." I said softly.
He inhaled then took a step, pushing the wheelchair forward carefully with me in it.
I couldn't explain the happiness I felt, how excited I was. I felt like jumping and bouncing around the place with excitement. My heart was overwhelmed and beating by the minute.
We left my room and immediately I started looking around. "Where are we going to?" I looked up and at his face, and there was a smile still there.
"It's a surprise."
I was practically kicking my feet with excitement as he pushed me faster, making me giggle.
"To the elevator!" He whispered- shouted.
He carefully passed all the rooms trying to make as little noise as possible.
He went to the elevator that was strictly for wheelchaired patients.
He let me press the button down (because I really wanted to) and we entered with the voice saying 'going down.'
"You excited?" He asked as the doors shut and I nodded immediately.
"I'm so happy right now." I couldn't wipe the smile off of my face. "Is it fun?"
"The place?" He smirked. "You'll like it." He replied.
After the elevator opened, this was the trickiest part. Getting past the front desk.
Soonyoung looked at the desk and saw the man leaning on his hand, and I saw him too.
"It looks like he's about to fall asleep." I laughed and he nodded.
"I think he is." He quietly pushed me slowly. "Shh."
I pretended to zip my lips and throw away the key as we passed.
Every second he'd look back to see if the man's eyes would open, but luckily they never did.
He finally ran out the automatic doors, us shouting victory as we made it outside.
"We made it!" I looked up again and he was laughing.
"We actually made it!" He shouted and pushed me faster making he break into a fit of laughter.
"This way!" I leaded him to the lights, following the ones in a line.
"Here we go~." He followed them, going to where ever this place was going to be.
I couldn't help but look at everything around me, I looked at the building and even the sidewalk.
I've been stuck in that room forever, I felt an unusual amount of happiness from viewing outside.
I looked up at the trees and at the clouds that left my nose from the cold.
I was thankful Soonyoung had found a coat to wear when we went out.
"We have a few stops." He told me.
"Do we?" I asked hopeful, immediately getting even more ecstatic (if that was possible).
"Is that it?" I pointed to a building with a bunch of white lights.
"Nope, not there." He replied.
"Is the place big? Are a lot of people there at this time? What do they have?" My throat released as much questions as humanly possible.
But then suddenly, I couldn't produce any more sounds when I felt Soonyoung gently kiss the top of my head.
"You'll see when we get there." He said in a smooth tone again.
I couldn't muster another question as my face went on fire,as which made him giggle. Until finally he said "Jihoonie look!" He pointed. "Look at all the lights over there."
I ignored my flushed face and turned to looked to my left and saw buildings covered in different color fairy lights.
I remember every year this area of the town puts up these lights and I always loved looking at them with my friends at school.
But this time it seemed better.
A soft smile came onto my face and I stared at them as we passed.
"It's so beautiful." I whispered and I heard Soonyoung make a noise of agreement.
"They are. It's been forever since I've seen them too." He said and now his pace in walking steadied out.
Hearing this made a question pop into my head, yet I was yet again weary to ask it.
But I did anyway.
"Soonyoung," I started. "How long have you been in hospital?"
I look up once again to study his expression. He sadly smiled and looked at me. "A year." He replied.
"A whole year..?" I muttered.
"Now it's two months more." He added. "But I'm not uncomfortable. It's bad, but I actually like it here now."
I stared at him when he spoke and felt something spark inside me.
I thought it was possibly the cold weather finally getting to me, but the way my heart started comfortably beating quicker made me think otherwise.
I bit down on my lips and wrapped the blanket more securely onto my body.
"Are you cold?" He leaned over to see my face which was flushed again for no reason.
I shook my head no. "I'm not."
"Okay good." He smiled.
His smile always was so sweet- honey could never ever compare to his bright smile.
Sooner or later we started to pass people.
Not a lot of people- but a handful as we passed by.
I wonder what they would think seeing someone sick pushing someone else sick on a wheelchair.
It's confusing.
Sometimes people would look our way and smile as if what they saw something"sweet or cute" and others were confused or concerned.
But I didnt mind it.
"Okay from now keep your eyes closed." He told me and I obliged.
"Okay." I let out and closed my eyes tightly.
I put my hand on his hand while he was pushing me.
He went faster knowing I couldn't keep in my laughter when he did- and I felt the cold air hit my cheeks.
"Okayyy," he drew out after a few minutes. "You can open your eyes now."
Not wasting even a second I peeked one eye open then the other.
Lights.
Lights of every color on trees, on structures, everywhere.
It was so beautiful.
There was a huge fountain in the middle which was letting water fall from its top, into the little pool under it.
Around it were benches and places to sit, but the most mesmerizing thing were the lights.
I couldn't say anything but I just kept looking around.
"It's pretty right?" Soonyoung laughed at my reaction and I tuned to look at him.
"I'm about to cry," I said simply and he jumped.
"No, no, no crying!" He shouted. "You're supposed to be happy!"
"I am." I said. "I truly am.. I haven't felt this happy in forever.. it's so beautiful." I said kept saying that.
"I love it- I love love it so much." I honestly said and focused on the fountain. "Can we go see it?"
"Of course we can." He replied and rushed up to it with me.
"It's so pretty!" I shouted and he sat down on the rim of the fountain in front of the wheelchair.
"Look in the water, there's so many pennies in there." He was right, there were so many humanly impossible to count.
They were scattered in piles and I couldn't see the tile from the bottom of the fountain.
"Open your hand," he demanded and I nodded, doing so.
He reached in his pocket and pulled out two coins and put them in my hands. "Make a wish and then throw them in."
His pale skin was nipped from cold and his blonde hair swayed in the wind as his attention was fixed on me.
The coat he wore made him look so cute and his eyes made me feel safe.
They made me feel like I could do anything.
"What should I wish for?"
"Anything." He smiled. "Something you want really badly."
I would've expected myself to wish to get better. I should've wished to be healthy, or something involving my family- but I didn't.
I closed my eyes and thought my wish hard and tightly held the pennies in my hands.
I wished that he'd never leave me.
"I heard blowing on them before you throw them is the key to make them come true." I said and looked up at him.
"Let's both do it then." He cupped my cold hands and on three we both blew on them. In the process he warmed up my hands making me release a giggle.
After that, we threw them in the fountain together.
"If your wish doesn't come true, then I'll make it come true." He said to me which made me smile.
"If that's the case then I know it'll come true."
He looked at my hands and saw they were red.
He took them with his own hands and rubbed them together.
I didn't really feel cold (or mostly I didn't notice it) but I definitely didn't pull away.
"We picked the worst weather to come here haven't we?" He joked but I shook my head.
"I'd come here even if it were snowing." Hearing this made him happy and smile again.
He tightly held onto my hands and then blew on them, making my whole body warm.
I felt tingly.
He did this and kept eye contact with me. "Is that better?" My whole chest felt on fire.
I nodded. "Y-Yes."
"Good." He continued doing this, and I eventually felt his lips graze my hand softly.
He was so gentle.
Soonyoung then placed a soft kiss onto my fingertips, and my heart skipped a beat.
He pulled away and subtly rubbed the back of my hand with his palm one more time and stood.
"Alright!" He said and shouted. "Next stop, here we come!"
He pretended like nothing happened, yet I was holding both my hands to my beating heart afterwards and my cheeks were burning.
He started taking me someplace else.
I didn't know where we were going, but he told me it wasn't far.
"I'm going to tell you where we're going now."
He said and I nodded. "There's a park here and there's a lot of trucks there. Usually 24 hours so they should be open right now."
I smiled sheepishly while snuggling in the blanket.
"It's really pretty at night." He then said and squinted to try to see it.
"Ah, there it is!" He beamed.
"Let's go!~" I pointed and he didn't waste any time.
He pushed me in the wheelchair and ran for the hundredth time that day.
It finally felt like I felt like I was normal.
I saw the park and it was was a normal looking one. It's the ones with no slides or jungle gyms, he probably picked this one because he knew I couldn't get up.
I wouldn't have minded though.
I wanted him to have as much fun as I was having.
We entered and then get stopped walking.
"What do you want to eat?" He leaned his head to see me and I looked back.
"I'm okay with anything." I smiled.
"I have saved money so I can get you anything you want. Just tell me and I'll buy it all."
He seemed excited to pick something.
I didn't feel hungry though. I don't remember eating in a while so I'm just going to go against the feeling.
I looked around and saw what all the trucks were selling.
"Mmm..." I trailed out. "I've never had a crepe before." I said and looked up, and he had a hurt, yet dramatic expression on his face.
"You what?! How?" He immediately wheeled me over to the stand. "We gotta fix that."
I laughed and then looked at the options. "What should I get..?" I didn't now what any of them tasted like, so I needed guidance.
"My favorite is the banana nutella one, want to try it?"
I nodded quickly and he smiled. "You can try mine first and decide if you want it or not."
"Okay." I said and got ready to actually try it for a first time.
I sat up straight as Soonyoung started to order his, and the lady there seemed really nice.
"Thank you very much," He thanked and carefully held the wrapped up crepe and offered it to me first.
He put his hand under my chin so that nothing would fall and I took a huge bite.
I really liked it. "Oo I like this one. Can I have it?"
"Of course you can, another one please." The lady nodded and gave Soonyoung another one, to which he handed to me.
"Enjoy your day!" She called to us after we paid.
"You too!" He waved and then we moved to another bench.
"Are you having fun so far?" I took another huge bite of the crepe and tried to reply.
"Yes! I can't believe we're here and did this." After I said that I continued to look around the park.
Soonyoung sat on the bench facing me again like last time.
"Is there anywhere you wanna go next?" He asked me and took the final bite of his crepe already.
I thought.
"Nothing I can think of. Just going out like this makes me happy."
"Good I'm so glad." He replied and threw out the trash in the bin near here.
"I'm going to tell my mom all about you," I started and listened to the wind pass. "I haven't called her that much yet- but she'll really love you."
I went on and on about how much I plan to brag about him, and he had a slight smile on his lips.
"Jihoon," he cut me off a little but I really didn't mind.
"Mm?" I asked and wiped the chocolate that was probably around my mouth.
He waited a minute before speaking. "Do I make you happy?"
"Of course you do." I immediately replied. I thought he was joking around like he always does, but I saw his expression fill with uncertainty.
"You know that right..? What's wrong?"
He let out a breath again. "I don't know." he looked to the side.
"I just wanted to check that you're happy."
"Even when I wasn't in the hospital, I've never been this happy. You make me feel so good about life." I told him and I looked down to smile.
"You're the only one on earth who would do the things you do for me." After I said this it was quiet.
But a comforting silence.
He reached into his side pocket and gave me two strawberry candies. He put them next to me so I could have them later.
"Thank you." I softly say and take the last bite of my crepe. I threw it out the trash in a bin that was just in reach.
Soonyoung then ate one of the candies and let out a breath.
"Aren't you cold?" He shivered and I shook my head.
"Nope, I'm nice and cozy." I confirmed.
We naturally found each other's hands again and tangled them.
It felt normal.
I closed my eyes and thought about the feeling.
How nice it was.
How nice it felt having him here.
He put his forehead against mine.
We both closed our eyes and stayed there, just enjoying the feeling of one another.
I heard his steady breathing and I copied his pattern to match my own.
We stayed like that for what felt like hours. But I didnt mind.
After a few minutes he pulled back and looked at me.
I blinked and he let out a breath and smiled. "You're so beautiful." He whispered and tucked a piece of my loose hair behind my ear.
My face went hot and as he moved and released my hands.
He cupped my face and gently rubbed his thumbs on my cheeks softly.
He looked at me fondly, while I didn't know how to react.
I didn't move away.
His eyes met mine and then my lips and I found my eyes trailing down to his lips too.
He pulled me closer and our lips were so close, I felt his warm breath against my cold skin.
My heart started beating quickly again and my whole stomach was twisting.
Until he finally moved and pressed our lips together.
It felt so right.
I felt sparks leave my lips onto his.
I took his hands off my face and twisted my fingers with his, pulling him closer, not breaking the kiss.
I squeezed his hands as our lips started to move in sync.
Shyly we both pulled away and I rested my head onto his shoulder to hide my face after.
I held onto his hands still.
"Jihoon I love you." He said.
I heard his heart beat quickly too.
"I love you more."