Only Room For One

28 - Decisions

Selena's POV:

Once Justin left, my mind immediately began to bounce all over the place. He had left his tour just to come here and console with me. He had my living room filled with an assortment of flowers. His effort was outstanding, but it seemed almost too real.

Taylor was still at my house and we spent the whole night going over the pros and cons of getting back together with Justin.

On the positive side, Justin had treated me like a princess while were together. He loved me, and he was really trying to get me to forgive him.

But on the negative side, he had cheated on me. And I didn't want this to happen to me again. I couldn't handle another heartbreak.

Taylor fussed at me all night, telling me how I shouldn't get back together with him. She hated him because he hurt me. Which was appreciated, but too much. I didn't want her view of Justin to be clouded because of what he did to me.

In the end, it was all up to me. To take him back or to not take him back.

Justin was handsome. He had the voice of an angel and he was super sweet to me. But what if he was just disguised as an angel to hide his devil side?

It was 9 in the morning when my eyes finally opened. I remember falling asleep around 5 in the morning because the sun had just started to rise.

Maybe it was my 4 hours of sleep, but my decision had been made.

I grabbed my phone off the nightstand to see a couple texts from Justin.

From: Justin

sweet dreams princess. hopefully i'll see u tomorrow don't let the bed bugs bite ;)

goodmorning lovely. when u see this call me and i'll treat u to breakfast if I want

This had been a hard process for me to experience. But I just had to do the right thing for me.

I dialed his number and held the phone up to my ear. He answered seconds later.

"Hey! How are you? How'd you sleep?" His voice was full of eagerness. I couldn't help but smile to myself.

"Hi.. I'm good. I didn't sleep much, but I'll be okay." I rose from my bed, walking into the bathroom to examine my appearance.

My hair was in a mess. Bags resided under my eyes. The color in my face had faded away. I didn't look like the same Selena I did months ago. There was only one cause for that.

"Why didn't you get sleep?" He asked worriedly.

"Just couldn't get to sleep. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine, I promise." I tried to reassure him, but if I knew Justin, he'd still worry about me.

"Oh, well okay. Are you hungry? We could get some breakfast." He sounded nervous. I bet he was biting his lip or messing with his hair like he always did.

"Actually, could you just come over? I'm not really hungry." My stomach was in knots. There was no way I could eat with all of this on my shoulders.

I think I had scared him by my sudden question. The tone in his voice changed rapidly from nervous to fear. "Yeah.. I'll be there in 10."

"See you then." I waited for a moment for his response, but hung up.

As I waited on him to arrive, I rethought my decision. This was the right thing. I was doing the right thing. I'd be happy with this. I hope.

There was a knock at my door a few minutes later. I walked over to the door, pulling it open gently.

He was dressed in a black hoodie and blue jeans. It was crazy how he could wear something so simple but still look drop dead sexy.

My heart skipped a beat when his eyes found mine.

"Uh, come in.." I moved aside so he could enter my house.

His body moved across the threshold, his posture giving away his nervousness.

"I.. I thought a lot about what you said.." I began.

His eyes focused on my face. There were all these different emotions in his hazel orbs-fear, worry, hurt, anger(most likely at himself). He just kept my gaze, waiting for me to continue.

"What you did was bad. Really bad. I'm really not sure if you won't do it again. But I don't want to lose you in my life. You understand me better than anyone. I don't think it'd be best if we continued to date right now, but I figured we could be friends.." I bit down on my lip as I waited for his response.

He looked upset, like my answer was worse than what he was expecting. "Friends...? I-I don't know if I could do that.. I don't think I could just be around you but not be able to touch you or kiss you.."

Excuse me? I had given him the best, well second best, answer in the world. And he couldn't do it?

"Justin.. It's either that, or you can be without me in your life. I'm giving you what I think is appropriate." I didn't consider this a hard ultimatum. He was acting like it was the end of the world.

"Selena, that's a slap in the face. How do you expect me to do that?" He sounded baffled.

I couldn't wrap my mind around why he was upset right now.

"I figured you'd rather have me as a friend than nothing at all. But if you're gonna be that way.." I looked away, slightly hurt that he'd rejected my offer.

"Selena.." He spoke my name with indifference. It was like he didn't care about losing me at all.

"Go, Justin. You had your chance and you blew it." I couldn't look at him. He had hurt me once again.

"Selena.. I-I didn't mean that.. I'm fine with being your friend for now.." He stuttered as the words came from his mouth.

"You know what? I think we should just not even bother. It's only going to cause more problems and troubles for us. You go your way and I'll go mine." I didn't know what came over me or why I said that.

His eyes widened out of astonishment. "W-what..? No! No! Selena, I love you. I don't want to lose you. I'll be your friend, whatever you want. Just don't do this.." He spoke with desperation.

"I think it's best Justin.. we're not meant to be together. I don't want to have the struggles of being friends. I think you should go.." The words streamed from my mouth. It hurt me to say them, but the more they dissolved into me, I realized this was best for both of us. To just forget about each other and move on.

"Selena, no.." He took a few steps forward, but I only took steps back.

"Justin, I'm sorry... but I can't do this. I can't be worrying about you all the time and if you're doing something wrong. I can't be away from you all the time. I can't take all the hate I get. I can't anymore. I'm doing this for not just me, but you too."

For weeks I had cried over him and told myself that if he came for me, I'd take him back. But now that it was happening, that wasn't the situation at all.

"Please leave.." My voice was quiet but just loud enough for him to hear. I needed him gone.

I could feel his eyes boring holes through me. I knew this would hurt him, but only for a while. He wasn't tied down anymore. He could do whatever he wanted without the repercussions. This was the best for him to be happy.

He stared at me for what felt like forever before finally turning around and walking out of the door.

That was it. He was gone. Out of the door and out of my life.
__________________
uh oh....

Don't forget to vote & comment!! Tell me how you feel!
8+