Brave - FanFic CHIM/CHERYL COLE

Part 202

Julie's POV

Rehearsals didn't take too long, and Mam seemed eager to leave. Paparazzi were lurking around everywhere today, even at rehearsal - I was clinging onto Mam feeling very uneasy with their presence.

"Do you want to grab a bite to eat?" She asked nervously, her voice wasn't as confident as before - always shaking as she spoke to me

"Mm I guess" She smiled happily, collecting her things as fast as she could

"Cheryl!" Mel came over and spoke to Mam, I stood off to the side giving them their privacy - I over heard Mam ask Mel if she'd want to join us with her daughter. I wanted to scream and shout at her for even thinking that was a good idea. Why couldn't we just have a meal together? Preferably alone.

"Mel is going to j-"

"Yeah I heard" I rolled my eyes and walked away from her - she didn't come after to me and I was thankful for that; I would have probably said something I didn't mean. We all got into the same suv, Mam sitting right beside me with her arm wrapped around my shoulder

"Julie did you know Phoenix is the same age as you?" Mel says, if this is her trying to make us friends - it's not happening. I have Libby, that's all the friends I need

"Oh cool" I gave her a fake smile, and settled into Mam's arms - hiding my face into her side. 'Please don't talk to me, please' I kept repeating to myself. I've had trust issues with making new friends ever since Cameron, and I don't plan on making any

The car ride was filled with light chatter on Mam and Mel's part, but other than that it was pretty awkward with Phoenix and I. I almost felt as if someone was choking the life out of me. I was very uncomfortable. We arrived at the restaurant in no time, and I was thankful Mam chose a spot close to the X Factor studio. We were greeted and seated immediately - Mam was sitting by me the entire time, always giving me attention and I could see Mel rolling her eyes at the way Mam was babying me

"She's a big girl Cheryl" She said, hiding her annoyance with a chuckle

"She's me wee baby girl" Mam cooed, planting a kiss against my cheek and wrapping her arm around me; going back to her meal. I couldn't wait to go home, I felt as if we were being judged - judged for the way Mam loved me. Does it really affect your life if my Mam babied me? She fed me all throughout dinner, cleaning my mouth with a napkin - just like a child. I was her child, I was her baby - and she didn't care what anyone thought.

"I heard you're top of your class Julie" Mel said bringing me out of my thoughts, Mam was smiling like a proud mother - showing off her kids advanced academics

"Yeah.." I never did like speaking about myself, I was always told not to show off - never speak about my success, especially when it came to school. Dinner was coming to a close, and I was praying to god it would end already - I wanted to go home, see Mum and baby Izo. That's where I loved being, with Mum - she always knew all the right things to say

"See you tomorrow Chez" Mel said her goodbyes to Mam, whilst Phoenix and I stood awkwardly beside them

"It was erm.. It was nice meeting you" I gave her a light hug, and quickly followed Mam to our awaiting car - letting out a sigh of relief once I took my seat

"Did you have fun?" Mam asked, the driver began his journey to our house - the car was filled with light music filling the awkward and tensed air

"No" I said bluntly, leaning my head against the window - watching the world pass

"You know what-" I turned my head around to meet a very sad looking Mam

"You didn't have to invite her.. Yeah everything isn't perfect between us right now. So what? It's not like we couldn't have dinner just the two of us.. I told you I felt uncomfortable around Phoenix and you go and invite them to have dinner with us" I wasn't shouting, I wasn't yelling - I was speaking to her with a tone of hurt laced in my voice

"I just wanted to sit with my Mam and have dinner with you.. No one else" I sniffed, cursing myself for getting emotional - all I wanted was to have an intimate dinner with her, where we could talk about what happened and move on

"I'm sorry Bubba.. I asked her only because I had said we were going for a meal, I didn't think she'd accept me invitation" she shuffled over to me, she hesitantly took me into her arms - incasing me into a cuddle

"It just hurts" I whispered, melting into her arms

"I still need you, I know we aren't on the best of terms.. but I do need you, I promise I do" My throat was tightening as the lump began to form

"I don't like us being like this" I spoke in a squeak, I was fighting back the sob - I was sick of crying all the time

"Carl-" She spoke to the driver

"Can you take us to the Wetland Centre.. The one you always take us to" She said to him, he swiftly turned the car around - changing his destination

"I want to take you somewhere" She kissed my cheek - her grip never loosening around me - my brain was working a million miles per second; trying to figure out what she wanted to show me. I sat in the car patiently, paying close attention to the streets outside of the car - trying to understand where we were going

It was dark, it was hard to see where we were - It was a park, with endless grass fields; surrounding water.

"Be careful" Mam said, she took my hand leading me through the darkness - the moon shining down on us giving off some sort of light. It was quiet, and peaceful - not a soul in sight. We didn't speak as Mam led us onto a dock - the moon reflecting against the water.

"Where are we?" I whispered, it's as if my voice couldn't go any louder - it was too serene. The cold winter night brought chills down my spine, erupting my skin with goose-bumps - that didn't go unnoticed by Mam. She wrapped her arms around me, looking off into the distance

"This spot means a lot to us" She said, I didn't interrupt her - I let her speak her mind, because I knew there was a lot to say. We both had a lot to say.

"It's this spot that I realized I loved your Mum, I also asked your Mum to be mine here, I asked her out on our first date here as well... but its also a spot I come to when I'm feeling upset, or confused.. or when I just need a minute to meself" She said sadly - my face was snuggled against her chest, listening to every word she was releasing from her lips. I could hear her heartbeat pickup - and I knew she was upset, and worried about the situation she had put herself into

"Before you found us, I used to come here and think about you.. I would imagine how you would look, what your voice sounded like, what your laughs.. I always hoped I would hear your laugh" I strengthened my grip around her, I knew she was going to get emotional - and I would soon follow her

"I wished I would have kept you Jules.. and the thought of you being upset with us right now makes it even more harder.. I know I was hard on you this past week.. I was being stupid, I don't want to change you. You're perfect as you are" She cried, kissing my temple repeatedly - I let her, I let her do what ever she needed in this moment. I'd do anything to make things better, she was a mess and I knew she regreted it

"I'ts okay Mam.. It's okay" I was crying along with her, we were both crying; stood in the middle of this peaceful land - ruined by our emotions and loud cries.

"I forgive you! I promise I forgive you" I always did, I always will - I would always forgive her, I forgave her all those years ago. I have her now, and that's all that mattered to me

"I love you Mam" Our arms were wrapped around each other, heartbeats beating as one - because a love like this will never be found. It's one in a million and I was lucky to have found my soulmate. Sometimes your soulmate doesn't necessarily have to be your partner - it can be your best-friend, your sister, your brother or in my case my Mam