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"A visitor?"
"Yes Y/N - a visitor. Please get ready."
Your breathed hitched in your throat. Could it be? Despite Family day is two weeks away - could you Father have gone out of his way to come to see you today?
"Is it my-"
"No., "Jisoo says, "I'm sorry Y/N."
And just like that light feeling in your body disappeared and was now replaced with a heavy feeling in your chest. Almost as if something was actually weighed down by something in your chest. Everything seemed to have not mattered.
You knew - that this feeling was going to stick with you the whole day. No matter how hard you would try to push it away. Your loud Aura replaced with blue.
Sadness painted onto your features.
Gosh. You really hated this feeling. The depression. People always belittled it. As if feeling sad for a few hours was now considered as depression.
They don't understand. They never will. Nobody will ever be able to feel the heaviness in their own heart all the time. As if someone was harshly pulling on their arterial cords.
Causing you to feel like you couldn't breathe.
As if your own body was suffocating.
Suffocating on your self-hatred.
Months have gone past and you would try. Try and push this horrible feeling back. But the more you keep thinking about it. The more mentally drained you become. The more self-hatred grows within.
Maybe this is why your Father never visited you...
Just maybe you are too depressed to be around.
That thought alone just rips your heart into pieces.
With your eyes closed. You pull over the warm sweater over your head. Slightly shivering as goosebumps began to prickle your skin as the cold air nipped at your skin. Due to your eating a bit more than usual. Your system was almost clarified to be healthy.
Your hair, however, was damaged and you badly wanted to trim it down to be a shoulder-length hair. Maybe even dye it a different color. Your pale white skin had gained some of its colors. Some of your mother's yellow tanned skin finally seeping through. Giving your round adorable face a color contrasting from your bright pink lips.
