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Soondeok's diary

I'm scared.

I can't bring myself to tell Eun that I'm sick. We've been through so much together, it's not easy being here today, me being healthy and all energetic again like the time when we first got married. I don't want my health to ruin it all. I should find a doctor, secretly, but Eun's been sticking to me lately, I can't even sneak out like I used to at night. I could ask Haesoo to summon a doctor for me in the palace, but the palace is full of people, what if I really am sick? What if I'm actually dying? I don't want people there to know, I don't want Eun to know. And father, the moment he looks at me, he'd know if I'm sick or not, which is why I must put make up on today before going to see him. He won't notice that I haven't been eating well lately, right? Oh, but what about dinner today? What if he insists that we say over for dinner? What if I want to vomit in front of everyone the way I did this morning when the maids came in with our breakfast? What if father makes a big fuss about it? And sister-in-law, she's had so many children, would she figure out that I'm not actually pregnant? Oh my head, so many things I'm worried about, I can't even breathe properly now. I should go out and get some air.

Eun's diary

Soondeok's in the garden now, don't know what's wrong with her, she won't tell me why she wanted to go to the picnic either. She's been acting so weird lately, it's like, her emotions are always going up and down. One moment she's smiling at you, the next she could be shouting at you or crying in a corner. Is this all part of her act? If it is, she's doing a good darn job scaring me. But what if she's not? What if there's really something wrong with her? The way she ran to the window this morning, that was no act, it's real, I could see it from her eyes, but she kept insisting that it was all part of her act. Is it because she doesn't want me to worry about it? Oh man, what should I do? Maybe I should tell the doctor to check out on her, but what can I say? She's supposed to be pregnant, she's supposed to behave this way, that's the only way we can stay together and dodge the divorce crisis.

I'm bringing her to a picnic today, will try to get some information from her then, when she's relaxed. I hope she'll just tell me everything instead of hiding things from me just because she doesn't want me to worry. But again, that's my wife, always so considerate...

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(Picnic)

'Oppa, we have pickles?'

'Ah, here. You told me to tell the maids to pack it, right?'

'Yeah, let me have one. Mmm! Delicious!'

'Honey, slow down.'

'I'm starving!'

'Your taste's kinda weird today. Radish pickle is too sour for me.'

'But it's super delicious! Gosh, I can have it all!'

'Honey, have some kimbap, there are pickles inside too. Here, ah~'

 Here, ah~'

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