𝐁𝐓𝐒 𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐆𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐒 𝟐 | 𝐟𝐢𝐧.

jin - request

thank you to julie_nana12 for requesting! the song for this is lovely by billie ellish

Thought I found a way
Thought I found a way, yeah

Reminders of the past. Normally, it's blissful to sit and go through memories associated to certain things, places or people but for Seokjin, it's a curse. In his small apartment, everything reminds him of you. Even as he walks down the empty street, all he can think of is how you brought colour to the town that's now returned to its usual grey. If he's ever drowning in thoughts of you, he goes to drinking.

He found a way

But you never go away
So I guess I gotta stay now

He thought he found a way. Barely able to make proper sentences, your beautiful smile enters his mind. He goofily smiles, throwing himself back on his bed. One of the reasons why he doesn't go to drink at bar. He's thought about moving across the country to rid himself of these thoughts but the fleeting moments he experiences when it seems like he's sleeping next to you give him joy.

So he stays.

Oh, I hope some day I'll make it out of here
Even if it takes all night or a hundred years

He will make it out of the state his friends dubbed as 'post breakup depression.' It might take a while though considering he spends all day waiting in his apartment for you to knock and apologise. He closes his eyes to the drunk hallucination of you brushing his cheek with its fingers.

Need a place to hide, but I can't find one near
Wanna feel alive, outside I can fight my fear

His dreams hold a place for him that shows the life he wants, one full of colour, happiness and love. One with you. It makes him feel alive but he knows he'll wake up and it'll be gone, just like you that morning. He's scared that his home will only exist in his mind.

The emptiness in his home begins to take its toll.

Isn't it lovely, all alone?