Finding Home (The Affair Series Book 3)

No Grudges

STEF POV

"I didn't know how I felt about it mom and I didn't want to upset you. I want to see Callie but I want to spend time with you and Frankie and Lena." Jude said as we sat in his room. After telling me his sister wanted to him to visit for the holidays I could see the confliction in his face. Sure I understood but I didn't want him to feel as if he had to choose or that he was hurting my feelings.

"Baby, I want you to spend time with your sister. Callie loves you. I told you she always, always has and if you want to spend the holidays with her of course have my blessing sweetheart.  You don't need to ever feel guilty, or like you are being disloyal."

"I just feel bad if I do mom. I don't want you to feel bad because it's kind of our first one since you have been feeling better. And it's our frist one with Frankie."

"Sweetheart there wil be many, many more. If you want to spend it with Callie you have my blessing and everyone in this home. You got me?"

"I'll think about it. But maybe just winter break."

"My love whatever you decide you let me know.  I don't have any objections ok? If you want to go for Christmas it's fine. Or if you want to go the day after and spend New Years there or the other way around you can my boy. I will not feel bad honey."

"Ok mom."

"Alright. Now what else? Anything else on your mind? MM?"

"Nah. Just that."

"Ok well if there is you tell me. And if you need to talk about this more you tell me. I will not break. Remember I'm the adult here you are the kid. Got it?"

"I got it." He  said smiling at me as I lend in and kissed his forehead.

"Good sweets. You get some sleep."

"I will." 

Kissing his forehead once again I walked off to head into the kitchen to make some tea as I soon heard Jude call my name.

"Mom?"

"Yeah love?" I asked turning around in his doorway.

"I just want you to know I love you. And I know Callie loves you too." Unsure of what to say I could only smile at him as the look of worry took over his face once again.

"I love you too sweetness and I hope so. Goodnight baby."

"Goodnight mom."

Smiling at my only son who brought so much joy in my life I quietly closed his door to make some tea. Lena had passed out already more then an hour ago as I walked into our kitchen to see Frankie in her pajamas and studying. Truth was I hadn't spoken to her much all day for I wanted to give her space from this morning and I wanted to try to approach this in a better way again. Last thing I wanted was another strained relationship with another one of my daughters. That my heart could not handle.

"Hey sweets when did you get in?" I asked her as I grabbed a mug and put the kettle on as a smile formed on her face. Truth was I didn't know if she was pissed at me or what but based off her reaction it didn't seem so.

"Oh about an hour ago. Did I wake you?"

"Nah I was up. I wouldn't go to sleep without knowing you were home anyway. Want some tea my love?"

"Sure." 

"So did you have fun with Aunt Fran?"

"Yeah. She's super nice. It's kind of like hanging out with you."

"Yeah how so babe?"

"Well she's super nice, gives good advice and just fun to be around. That's how you are." Turning around to look at her I could only let out a smile as she returned it. Maybe she didn't hate me for I had almost forgotten that Frankie was very much like Jude. Very much so in the fact that she didn't hold a grudge unlike me and Callie.  Pouring some hot water into mugs I took a seat beside her at the table as she glanced into my eyes.

"Frankie about our talk at breakfast. Listen babygirl I.....

"No wait ma." She said gently placing her hand on top of mine. " Look I'm sorry I stormed off on you like that. It was rude and I apologize."

"Frankie you have no reason to apologize love. I understand I frustrated you and most likely pissed you off. I got it and I realize I treated you like a child. You are almost 24 not 14 and I think I forgot that love."

"No, no mama I wasn't pissed off. I get you're overprotective. I do and I know you tried to help. I really do get that."

"I just want the best for you honey. I do and maybe I went about it the wrong way. Maybe I was too bossy and controlling."

"Well you can't help how you are." She laughed as I did the same.

"Yeah don't I know it. Still you are an adult love and I can't tell you who to date or who not to. I can advise but I can't forbid you. Unless you know it's an abusive relationship. That's another story."

"Well I know you look out for me mom. I know that. But I was honest when I said it was just coffee. He is a nice guy but I do listen to what you say. Honestly and I know it doesn't come from a bad place. I know you just started to be my parent a few months ago and you are an amazing  mom and I really love you."

"I love you too sweetheart. I do and listen if it turns into more then coffee I will um I will get use to it." I said sighing and trying not to show my lack of enthseum.

"Sure mama!" She laughed. "But I'm not in a rush to date anyway. I just want to focus on this exam and making the force."

"You will make the force honey. I have no doubts. You shouldn't either ya know. We have a long line of police women in our family and you are one of them. I need to trust you baby and your choices and I promise I will. "

"Thanks mama." Getting up from her seat she wrapped her arms around my neck hugging me. All I could do was hug her back for I loved this sweet girl. Damm did I ever. "I love you."

"I love you to Francesca. More then anything. But know you can always come to me. Always."

"Thanks mama."