Finding Home (The Affair Series Book 3)

Awkward Dinner

It wasn't easy to say the least but Lena had invited Fran and Debbie for dinner after getting the ok from her girlfriend. Maybe they didn't have a big talk yet or the talk they needed but dinner with the family was possibly an ok step. Stef of course was nervous while Frankie and Jude couldn't believe how much their mother looked like the older blonde. They of course knew the situation was difficult for their mother as they help set the table and bring the food out.

"You ok mama?" Frankie whispered as she helped her mother add food to one of the serving bowls.

"Yeah sweets why wouldn't I be?"

"Well I know this is not easy for you. I mean your aunt being here and everything."

"It's ok love. Sometimes you have to face things no matter how hard they are."

"Yeah. She seems really nice. You look just like her."

"Yeah. She is nice baby."

"Well I hope you guys work it out. She seems like she really loves you and wants to be there for you and in you life. Kind of like you were when we first met. I didn't have anyone." Glancing at her daughter Stef let out  a soft smile as Frankie smiled wide at her. "You were really easy to love mama."

"You were really easy to love sweetheart. Still are." Pulling the girl in for a hug she kissed the top of her forehead wondering how dinner would go. Maybe she would try harder then she had been and give her aunt the benefit of the doubt. That was all she could do.

"So you are a cop too like mama?" Frankie asked rather excited as the family enjoyed the baked ziti Lena made. For the most part dinner had been going well even if Stef had barely spoken a word.

"I am. Well I was I retired a few months ago. Miss it at times but it's nice to relax now."

"It must be. Um Frankie actually is interested in being a cop. A k9 right honey?" Lena asked.

"Oh wow really the apple doesn't fall from the tree huh?" Fran said smiling at the young girl as her eyes glanced to Stef who continued to eat her food avoiding the woman's eyes.

"Yeah. I love animals  and I guess you could say I'm following in mama's footsteps." She said looking to her mother who smiled.

"Well that's really nice. It can be a tiring career but rewarding at the same time. You just need to be sharp and keep your eyes open."

"I definitely will."

"I am sure."

"Stef when did you join the police force?" Debbie asking trying to get the young blonde to talk as Fran glanced to her niece smiling.

"Um in my early 20s. Pretty much after I moved from here."

"And that was in San Diego?" Debbie asked treading lightly.

"Um no Sacramento actually. I didn't move to San Diego until much later."

"It's beautiful. San Diego." Fran said. "I mean much more beautiful than Michigan. The beaches alone and the sunsets. Frankie you must have been very little when you moved to California with your mama."

"Um..

"She didn't move with me. I didn't know her then. I had her when I was 17 and gave her up for adoption." Stef blurted out as the table went silent.

"Oh I didn't know ..I..

"How would you know." The younger blonde said rather coldly.

"Stef." Lena whispered gently holding her girlfriend's hand as Stef  let out a sigh.

"I apologize sweetheart."

"It's fine. You couldn't know. But um do you enjoy California?" Lena asked trying to change the subject as the tension was growing more and more.

"Yes. We both love it very much. It's a nice place to retire to."

"Yeah it's cool. We have the best weather." Jude chimed in.

"You definitely do. So what grade are you in Jude?"

"Oh I'm in 6th."

"Oh nice middle school."

"Yeah it's cool. Lena is  my principal."

"Oh wow." Debbie said smiling." Does that work ok?"

"Yes Jude is a good kid. Polite, hard worker. Very bright."

"Well all your kids seem to be very special Stef. You must be proud of them." Deb said trying  hard to help the younger blonde relax a bit.

"I am thank you. They are my babies and good kids."

"You were a good kid too." Fran chimed in. "You were smart, funny and I always knew you would make something of yourself. No matter what."

"Yeah well I tried."

"You succeeded."

"Yeah did I?" Stef asked rather sarcastically.

"From what I see yes. No one is perfect but you did."

"You don't have to keep telling me what you think I want to hear."

"I'm not honey."

"No? You don't know enough about me to make that statement."

"Stef..." Lena tried but the blonde was too far gone.

"I don't know everything that went on in your life but...

"So how can you come to that conclusion. Huh? Blowing smoke up my ass. You don't know what I was, you don't know what I did or how poorly I treated my kids. You don't know how poorly I treated my girlfriend, how many times I broke her heart, how many times I broke Lena's heart. You don't know. So stop sitting her and acting like you know who I am when you don't. You know who I was at 10. Not at 40. And if you did know who I was you would have been ashamed of me. I was not who you taught me to be I was the opposite.  I ruined and hurt my middle  daughter so much she won't speak to me, I hurt my son when he was little by accidently poisoning  him because I was drunk and messing around with some guy, I gave my little Frankie away because I was too much of a chicken shit to take care of her. I picked men  that were no good and I treated them no better. I was a drunk, I was a drug addict and I was nothing. I'm not this wonderful person you think I am. So just stop."

"Baby.." Lena said her voice cracking a bit as she tried to grab Stefs hand. But the younger blonde got up from the table as tears ran down Frankie's face as well as Jude's, Fran's, Debbies and Lena's. Maybe Stef needed to say that, maybe she needed to get it out and off her chest but it didn't mean it didn't hurt everyone at that table and the people that loved her. For it did as Lena soon got up when Fran stopped her.

"I will talk to her. I will. We need to have it out no matter what. And no matter how long it takes."

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This is not an easy process.