Bexley

12 7 0
                                    

Guilt is to the spirit,

what pain is to the body.

what pain is to the body

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My chest hurt as I felt lost. I had felt the pain of losing my old pack members late in the night. My mother, father, and brother all running back home as quickly as possible to help Ellis and Wilder in the fight.

I felt helpless.

When I woke up, I woke up with a scream. Those who are sleeping when it happens are in a more vulnerable state. When we are sleeping, we are closer to the Goddess as we rest in the light of the moon.

Lazarus hadn't been with me when I woke up.

As I laid there, my chest pounding as tears unwillingly streamed down my face I was gasping for breath as I felt one of the connections still linked to my soul, my very being, disappear. I could hear the footsteps, but that did nothing for me as I struggled to breathe, no air willing to enter my body as I choked on nothing.

"Bexley," I could hear his voice as he screamed down the halls. "Fucking breathe, baby."

I wanted to laugh at the irony, Lazarus barely speaks, only taking when he finds it necessary. Yet here he was screaming down the halls of his home.

My bedroom door flew open, where Lazarus and I said goodnight not just a few hours before he went into a meeting with my family. Maverick and Emery had fallen asleep in the living room, but I could hear their cries and whimpers now.

"Breathe." He demanded, had I not been suffocated I would have snapped at him for trying to boss me around. His hand found my back, smacking it as I suddenly began couching. Drawing in the breath that had been stolen from me.

"Thank the Goddess," He whispered under his breath as he pulled me into his lap as I sobbed, another being stolen from my pack link as I clutched Lazarus closer to me.

I hadn't fallen back asleep after the event from this morning. Lazarus didn't let me leave a room unless he was beside me. I had grown agitated when he wouldn't let me move from his side so now we were confined to the same room.

I could feel his worry through the partial bond, so I kept my mouth shut when he would breathe in long breaths as my scent would calm him.

Sitting on the couch with Maverick and Emerson in Lazarus office, I was reading them a braille book quietly as Laz struggled to focus on his work.

"Where'd Momma go?" Emery asked out of the blue as we finished the book, sitting quietly on the couch as I watch Lazarus clench his hand around his pen.

"To help with the pack." Smoothing back her hair, I began to pull the strands into a dutch braid.

"Someone died, didn't they?" Maverick spoke up, my eyes found him as I took my hand from Emery's hair, rubbing my thumb over his cheek.

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