Blood deep (Black Series 3)

Chapter 38

Rose

'I want to leave this place, Selena. I can't stand being here anymore.' I tell her.

'Sweetheart... where will you go?' She asks me while looking at Dorian for help.

'She is right, Rose. Where will you go? You have a six months old daughter.'

My heart flutters in my chest when I think about my beautiful daughter. She was born on April 2nd, while I wanted to die that day. Hearing her cries for the first time has changed my entire perception about love. I've always thought I knew what love was, but I couldn't have been more wrong. Love is her. It begins and ends with her, and I know I will do anything to keep my baby safe.

'Yes, I do have a daughter. And she has a father that hasn't witnessed her being born, I also had a pregnancy that lasted only 1 month in my mind and millions in a bank account on my name. Nothing makes sense in my life. Did I forget to mention that I am a vampire now? Did I mention that my baby is also a freakin' vampire according to your tests?' I run my hand through my hair nervously.

'But you wanted this...' Selena cuts in.

'Well, I was stupid. I didn't know what a nightmare this would be. I didn't know I would get pregnant and become a vampire at the same freakin' time.'

'Rose, you don't mean that. Think about this.' He walks towards me and I can see how worried he is about me. 'You can't walk in the sunlight without the serum. I understand you are hurting, but you need to be strong. He will return.' Dorian tells me.

'I can't... this is too much. Why did I make him to turn me?' I start crying and collapse on the armchair in Dorian's office.

'He will be back.' Selena wraps her arms around me and kisses my hair.

'Even if he does return, I don't know how to pick things up from where we left. I don't know if I even want to. All I want to do these days is snap his neck.' I tell her while my sobs and anger choke my breathing.

'That's understandable.' Dorian gives me a small smile. 'But sweetheart, don't rush into decisions. You are a newborn vampire and a new mother. Your body is still adjusting to a lot of things. Your mind is clowded by thirst, raging hormones and other sensations that come with the new life you have now. Hell, you don't know how to control your instincts and from what I know, it will take years until you do. Give yourself a break.' He explains to me.

'Where is he, Dorian? This whole new life...I was supposed to live it with him? Where the hell is he? Why the fuck am I doing this alone?' I jump from my chair and lose control over my anger.

Before I manage to do something stupid, I hear my baby crying through the intercom and my mind calms down in a second. I turn around and walk to her room without saying another word to Selena or Dorian. My mind is focused only on her voice.

My baby girl is my anchor now.

Theo

I've just landed in Palermo. Officially, this has been the longest period I was away, controlled by my thirst. I have flashes during the day and also during the night with people I've killed. I am truly a monster.

It was a mistake to turn her. I should have let her go when I had the chance, let her find happiness with a normal man. I shouldn't have allowed our relationship to continue. I should have fought harder that night she made me turn her. But it's too late now.

'Where the fuck have you been?' My father asks me, shocked to see me in the middle of the living room.

'Lost...' it's the only thing I could tell him and it's also the truth. I was so lost, even when the fog of the thirst lifted it took me another three damn weeks to be able to walk out the hotel room without turning at the scent of flesh and blood.

'I don't even know what to tell you.' He says while looking at me with disappointment.

'You could start by telling me why the fuck didn't you search for me!' I tell him between my clenched teeth.

'Where the fuck do you think Alex and Cain are right now? They managed to catch up with you somewhere in Croatia and then you disappeared again. They are busy cleaning up your mess, making sure you don't fuckin' go to jail, creating you and Rose a new identity.'

'Yeah, yeah. Just great. But I should go to jail, shouldn't I? After all, I'm a fucking monster.' I sound like a mad man by now, and maybe I am. Maybe I've lost my fuckin' mind.

'Pull your shit together and grow the fuck up! You've lived all these years and learned nothing.' He says while walking towards his office. I follow him angry.

'Don't you dare judge me! You were still fucking and feeding when you met mom and you were 600 years old!'

'Well, at least I didn't turn anybody and I sure didn't go on a thirst rampage throughout the entire fuckin' Europe. If it weren't for Rose, I wouldn't even have bothered searching for you, this time. I'm tired of your shit.' He yells at me but I know he doesn't mean it. The sound of her name calms me down a little.

'You know I can't control it!' I lower my head with regret.

'Let me give you a hand with that!' I hear a wicked voice behind me. Before I can turn around, I feel a pair of small hands grab my head and snap my neck. Darkness takes over me in a fraction of a second as my body crumbles on the floor.

Rose

Damn, that felt good!