Heal my wounds (hiccstrid)

Chapter 13

Chapter 13: all these little things

- Wednesday after school -

Hiccup POV

"What is white and lives in a tree?" I smiled at Astrid who was walking beside me, we where walking to my house we decided that she should come over to mine and we can do our homework together.

"I dunno" she shrugged her shoulders carelessly as she rubbed her arm trying to get some heat friction.

" a fridge" I started cracking up laughing, I slapped my hand onto my knee as I looked like a retarded seal. I whipped away a tear in my eye and turned to see Astrid reaction.

She was looking at me with such a scared face "why are we friends?" I heard her mumble to herself. But those words made my heart drop slightly I knew we where friends but I always knew we couldn't be anything more than that because she has a lot going on a so do I.

What's white and blue and lives in a tree?" I asked Astrid just made a sound for me to continue not wanting to say a wrord.

"A fridge wearing a denim jacket" I looked like a retarded seal that couldn't breathe. After a few minutes of recovering I walked with Astrid in silence. "Hey Astrid I just wanna say no matter what I'm here for you, you can call me anytime you want ok? No matter what" I spoke honestly as I glanced over at her making sure she understood exactly what I was saying was not fake.

"Thanks Hiccup I'll be, I'll be sure to keep that in mind," Astrid mumbled while she looked down, her hands subconsciously tugging at the bottom of her sleeves. The way she always looked down at her wrist to make sure they weren't exposed, or the way she would always flinch whenever someone's hand came near her she would back away, or whenever we where at the cafeteria she wouldn't eat because she had a big breakfast of she's eating a big meal with her family.

All of these things I notice about Astrid worry me, it makes me sick in the stomach because I really want to help her out. But I can't I just can't, I can take away everything that she has to hurt herself because that not how to do it it's to make her feel better and try and help her stop cutting and make her happier and more alive. I need to distract her I need to make her feel like there are no worries and that we all need to have fun. And I'm starting on my plan when we get to my house.

The rest of the walk was calm and easy going we talked about anything and everything. Every once in a while I would bring up another stupid joke and she would be laughing really hard. Her laugh was so angelic like she didn't have any problems and she was care free.

"Where here" I spoke out in a sing-song voice while I gestured to my house that stood proudly behind me. I looked over at Astrid to see her smiling fondly at the house and even added in "I like your house." I hummed in response as I started walking over the the front door.

Once inside and both of our bags placed on the floor I heated up some popcorn as Astrid was getting all the books ready, upstairs. "Ahhhhhh" I yelled when I heard the buzzer go off on the microwave. I looked around making sure Astrid wasn't there and the coast was clear.

A few minutes later and I was sitting in my room tutoring Astrid in maths. I know we where only supposed be doing work together but with the way Astrid looked close to tears as she worked on her maths problems scared me. I didn't was her to be sad because when she's sad she might want to, well harm herself.

I never understood self harm, hurting yourself to eventually make yourself feel better? I just know that I would never do it and I didn't want Astrid doing it. Just the thought of Astrid hurting herself would rip me apart. She's so beautiful and I didn't understand why she was so sad. But as much as it hurts to say, I don't know Astrid personal life that well so she may of had a hard time in her life to trigger it.

But I couldn't just ask Astrid is would make her uncomfortable and maybe triggered and I didn't want to do that. "Yeh that right, you bring it back down and put it to the power of 6, yep exactly" I encouraged her as o looked at the work that 20 minutes ago she had no idea how to do, but now she was aceing it!

I small smile spread its way across Astrid face. I felt accomplished, I had helped her while figuring out the answers to my questions along the way. I no longer saw a sad face I saw a happy face, with a small but visible smile that meant the world to me.

"Well now for history" I heard Astrid mumble as she pulled out the history text book that was the size of a fricken overweight cow. (No offence to cows, I love cows there cute and even fat ones)

"Wait that was last weeks homework, why are you so far behind?" I asked as I studied the page she was writing down seeing that we had been assigned this last week. "Oh well at home it's pretty busy and I don't have a lot of time with my dad always assigning chores for me to do and it's just really hard" Astrid stammered out, her wide eyes and uneasy face expression worried me.

"Oh ok" I decided not to push it because the last thing I wanted was Astrid becoming uncomfortable, and especially by me. But I couldn't stop worrying about her she didn't eat any of the popcorn and declaring that 'she had the biggest breakfast and she couldn't eat anything' along with her flinching away all the time anything got in her way.

The truth is I'm worried there's something more that's going on with Astrid, and I don't like it one bit.

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- Asty xx